I don't know if this is an ADHD thing or not, but I figured I would post to find out. Do any of you have a problem with missing things, like in conversations or when reading, etc? For example I have been able to function pretty well and not have my ADHD made too "obvious" because I learned when I was young how to pick up on certain important things without having to go through all the details. Sort of like reading a summary of a chapter but not the chapter. And I think that has been VERY effective for me. Unfortunately, in relationships conversations aren't so structured-- people don't start out with a paragraph of dialogue explaining what they are going to talk about, before they start in a conversation with me. So I have tended to miss things, a lot of things. It's caused me some really significant issues in the last couple of years that I am not going to go into, but I feel like a real idiot when this happens. I will pick up on some things but not others, or I will be unresponsive when someone is talking because I'm not really following them, so that when I'm asked a question I'm thrown or I tend to repeat things back to people that they just said, as if it's the first time *I'm* hearing it. Does anyone relate? Or am I just weird in this way? Now that I'm newly-diagnosed, should I explain this to people? That I never knew I had ADHD, but that it does explain some of the important thigns I have "misseD" in the past, and now that I know I have it I am going to be working on ways to ensure I don't miss things? I don't mean use it as an excuse but to explain...

This happens to me too... I think what's going on is our brain isn't patient enough to listen to the whole conversation, so it tries to boil it down to the important parts...

Sounds like an ADD thing to me. There are times when my wife is ready to brain me when I'm having a excessive streak of missing things.

David

Yes. I can relate.

As for explaining it to other people, I'd say it depends on the person. If it's a person who is important in your life, I'd say "definitely." If it's a person who is understanding, again, I'd say "yes." Unfortunately, I agree that many people don't understand (or don't want to understand) ADHD and will very likely think you are using it as an excuse. I'd say feel them out and you might want to explain it anyway. Then again, you might do your best at faking it. In those situations, I don't think there's a right or wrong answer. Much depends on what you're comfortable with.

(Yes, I know: "A preposition is a word you should never end a sentence with." Sometimes, though, it sounds better that way).

Sounds like an ADD thing to me. There are times when my wife is ready to brain me when I'm having a excessive streak of missing things.

David
all I can say is this applies to me to.

same here. Its starting to become a problem somewhat, but i am working on it. Everytime someone comes to talk to me at work i just remind myself, slow down, stop, listen, stay on task. Sometimes its hard when theres lots of people in the kitchen but i am getting better at it.

ahalo wrote: I have been able to function pretty well and not have my ADHD made too "obvious" because I learned when I was young how to pick up on certain important things without having to go through all the details. Sort of like reading a summary of a chapter but not the chapter. And I think that has been VERY effective for me. Unfortunately, in relationships conversations aren't so structured-- people don't start out with a paragraph of dialogue explaining what they are going to talk about, before they start in a conversation with me. So I have tended to miss things, a lot of things.
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Totally. I just got diagnosed this week (at 46 years old!) but I have been able to skate thru life most of the time, because I absorb the high points easily, especially when reading. Straight A's thru grade school, only started getting poor grades in H.S. and so-so in college (but graduated with a decent rank).

I don't believe I would be diagnosed ADHD even if I were a kid today -- when I look back, it completely fits, but wasn't obvious to others. The only reason I know today is because so many parts of my life were caving in due to ever-increasing procrastination and clutter.

Anyhow, in response to the thread, I feel like sometimes I only get like 5% of what's going on around me, especially in conversations or spoken presentations. If it's a movie or on TV, I absorb more like 90%. Weird, huh?

And it almost seems like, the more important the conversation, the less likely I am to hear it & remember it. I just zone out.

BTW, I just started taking Strattera yesterday, so I'm hoping that when it kicks in I'll be able to get a handle on things.....

Try as I might, some things just get past me. I can't focus 100%

Me :D

I get chastized quite often from my wife. She'll be talking to me about
things, for what seems like an enternity, and I'll do a good job at making it look
like I'm absorbing everything she is saying. When she's done many times I'll ask
her a question not realizing that she just told me what I was asking! arghh!!!
Gets her aggravated a bit. :)
In my work envionment I have learned to take a ton of notes during meetings or
when being told details of problems. I used to forget to fix or follow through
100% of the action items needed. Still happens at times when I misplace my
notebook :-)

I hear the same thing from my husband, it goes like "I know I told you that, you weren't listening", I just tune that out, I guess for defense, I must miss a lot of stuff-but don't you just want to Cut to the chase sometimes- not have to decipher through all the junk to get at what you really need or want to know? I love history I think cause that is all facts, truth, it really happened, anything else that is fabricated and based on someone's opinion I have no use for, sorry that was out of the blue, but I miss a lot I think in general.

I can definitely relate! "Missing" things happens to me all the time. One explanation I've heard that really makes sense in my case is, I tend to see things in a "big picture" context. Because of this, until I have an idea of where a person's comments are leading I don't have whatever it is I need in my mind to tie what I'm hearing with the end "goal" of the conversation. In other words, I don't have the slightest idea what we're talking about...

Also, I'm aware that I tend to form mental images in my head as people are talking to me. Sometimes (often) they talk faster than the speed at which my brain is capable of forming the image. Or, vice versa, they form thoughts so slowly it gives my mind time to get distracted--I'd guess this takes about 5 seconds, on the average! :) Either way, it's a problem.

At work I supervise a team responsible for solving inventory problems that involve multiple systems in a manufacturing and warehouse environment. I absolutely love the problem-solving aspects of my job. But, when asked for advice on how to solve a problem, I often have to politely stop a team member from continuing with various details of the problem long enough for me to ask pointed questions (that are popping into my mind and clamoring for attention) in an effort to "fill in the blanks". Usually it only takes few missing details for me to (literally) "get the picture". But until I get those essential details I may as well be lost in La-La land.

I often find myself saying things like, "Where are you headed with this?" or "Let's start at the end--tell me the nature of the problem (in a nutshell)." Then, when I have an idea of what we're talking about, my mind can quickly back up to collect details that explain how we got there. I always seem to do best if I start at the end and work my way backwards.

Even well-defined, linear details don't necessarily make sense to me until I have an idea of where they're leading. It depends on the subject and my interest level. (Trying to read a text book to learn something new can literally put me to sleep.) It feels like my mind can't collect, connect and hold onto detail long enough for it to get to the point where it starts to make sense--unless it forms a "picture" (or until I get what feels like a "sense" of understanding). Go figure!

(I'm new here...female, age 52...have always felt like it was "me vs. my brain"--although, I do, generally, really like how my brain works, except when it's not working! My GP started me on Adderall in April. First time on meds. Started with 5 mg once a day, then worked up to 10mg Adderall XR (a.m.) and 5 mg "amphetamine salts" (p.m). A dramatic change and relief at first, but now back to reality--searching for how best to let myself enjoy being me.)

I so do this all the time

Reading I'll miss a whole section cause my brain is going to fast

Writing I miss spell stuff all the time or leave out a letter cause my brain is just going and there is no stopping it

Also when talking I'll leave out words sometimes..funny thing is I swear I say them but my friends/family say I miss the words. :D

Also I'll "tune" out people but not realize it. And then feel sheepish cause I don't remember half of what they asked me or told me!

I guess at least I can "remember" some of the time! ;)

Good times!