View Full Version : Worst Pick-Up Line EVER.


Mesaana
05-05-11, 03:40 PM
Just curious, what is the worst pick-up line you have ever heard of? Or you can make one up. I wanna see the cheesiest, corniest pick-up lines EVER.

Offle
05-05-11, 03:59 PM
Him: "J'achete des belle chaussettes. It's french for I think you're beautiful."

Me: Je parle franšais.

Him: Never mind.

Clearly someone didn't pass french 1.

ginniebean
05-05-11, 04:02 PM
The worst one I've ever used was "tonight we will discuss "all is illusion". Bone up!

It was a txt message

Blueranne
05-05-11, 04:02 PM
Do you know the essential difference between sex and conversation? (No.) Do you wanna go upstairs and talk.

Blueranne
05-05-11, 04:04 PM
Hi, I just wanted to give you the satisfaction of turning me down; go ahead say no.

Mesaana
05-05-11, 04:04 PM
i had a guy tell me that if i was a lap-top, i would melt in his lap. oh yeah, and this one- "you have the kind of face that belongs in movies, and the kind of body that belongs in my bedroom." from the same guy.

Mesaana
05-05-11, 04:05 PM
if you were a laser... you would be set on stunning?

Blueranne
05-05-11, 04:05 PM
Question: "Excuse me, do you have the time?" answer: "Yeah! Do you have the energy?"

BR549
05-05-11, 04:07 PM
This one sticks out because the guy was creeping on me all night: "Is it hot in here, or is it just you?"

Blueranne
05-05-11, 04:10 PM
You see my friend over there? [Point to friend who sheepishly waves from afar"> He wants to know if YOU think I'M cute.

peripatetic
05-05-11, 04:32 PM
i don't know if this counts as a "pick up line", but i was once approached by a fellow student i semi recognized from class before...and defo did after...with an air of urgency and pleading who said to me:

i think you're so beautiful and i'd do anything to take you home tonight. i've seen you around and i know you're not going to be my girlfriend--but i'm totally down with that if you want? but would you hook up with me just once? if you need to get real drunk i'll buy your drinks. oh, and if you black out i swear i'll wear a rubber.

:eek:

if he hadn't been completely socially awkward in general and practically begging so that i ended up feeling badly for him...i'd've been seriously freaked out. seriously. as it was...i told him to stop talking, turn around, and walk directly out of the bar. as he was doing so i dumped out my drink on the off chance my astonishment enabled some quick slight of hand roofying of it.

Mesaana
05-05-11, 04:33 PM
you're like a pokemon, i wanna peek-at-chu!!!!

Blueranne
05-05-11, 04:36 PM
oh, and if you black out i swear i'll wear a rubber.

OMG that is just too dang funny! This story belongs in a movie or something.

BR549
05-05-11, 05:38 PM
if you need to get real drunk i'll buy your drinks.

At least he was willing to buy you drinks :p I sure hope you plan on writing a book. I imagine you have lots of funny stories!

Surly Dave
05-05-11, 05:44 PM
Sorry, but I got one: "I've got roses, chocolates, and a gun..."

And: "I hear a lot of you women are inhibited and have reservations. That's what the ropes are for."

peripatetic
05-05-11, 05:44 PM
At least he was willing to buy you drinks :p I sure hope you plan on writing a book. I imagine you have lots of funny stories!

i swear to you he was pulling out his wallet as he said it. the boy was pulling out all the stops:p

Rebelyell
05-05-11, 06:15 PM
if I told you,you had a nice body would you hold it against me

Nifferka
05-06-11, 12:58 PM
if I told you,you had a nice body would you hold it against me

I've heard that one before!

"I'm not clever or rich, but I'm not psycho or diseased, either. Just tell me what I have to say to get you to come home with me."

Umm...something better than that, maybe?

Rebelyell
05-06-11, 04:01 PM
Would you like a piece of gum?Puts gum in his mouth an has girl take it and kisses her.
Could I get a shake w them fries?:D

Offle
05-06-11, 08:04 PM
"If you come home with me, I'll keep you screaming all night long."

That one creeps me out. It makes think I'm being hit on my a serial killer.

Grasshoppaa
05-06-11, 08:20 PM
The one I have the most success with is: "Say girl, are those astronaut pants, cause your butt is out of this world!"

Sorry, but I got one: "I've got roses, chocolates, and a gun..."

And: "I hear a lot of you women are inhibited and have reservations. That's what the ropes are for."

ummm, I sure don't get this one and I read it like three times. I must be missing something.

"If you come home with me, I'll keep you screaming all night long."

That one creeps me out. It makes think I'm being hit on my a serial killer.

This pick-up line and a few other sure do make me curious about what you galls look like................:cool:

Offle
05-06-11, 08:29 PM
This pick-up line and a few other sure do make me curious about what you galls look like................:cool:

I think alcohol plays a bigger part in guys hitting on me like that than my actual level of hotness.

BouCoupDinkyDau
05-08-11, 09:26 PM
Guys actually say sh*t like this?! On a regular basis?! The very few times I have overheard pickup lines, I feel sorry for the dude delivering them. They always seem to be balding, over-the-hill types that still want to bed 20-year-olds. It's like some sad cry coming from a dying animal that just wants to get laid one last time. The death-mating call of species Patheticus Penius.

It's like saying, "Hi, I would like to use your vagina for the next ten minuets but I have no skills, no talents, no prospects, no looks, a repulsive personality, a very checked reputation, a possible social disease, and this is the best excuse for charming I could come up with. Will you please sleep with me?"

BR549
05-08-11, 09:46 PM
It's like saying, "Hi, I would like to use your vagina for the next ten minuets but I have no skills, no talents, no prospects, no looks, a repulsive personality, a very checked reputation, a possible social disease, and this is the best excuse for charming I could come up with. Will you please sleep with me?"

That's EXACTLY verbatim what women think when guys hit on us using lame crap lines. How on earth did you know that?

BouCoupDinkyDau
05-08-11, 09:49 PM
That's EXACTLY verbatim what women think when guys hit on us using lame crap lines. How on earth did you know that?

Because that's what I feel like they are saying! :eek:

tipoo
05-08-11, 10:31 PM
The word of the day is legs. Want to go spread the word?

Joker_Girl
05-08-11, 10:34 PM
"Can you help me find my puppy? I think it ran into that cheap motel across the street."

tipoo
05-08-11, 10:38 PM
You'll do.


That's EXACTLY verbatim what women think when guys hit on us using lame crap lines. How on earth did you know that?

Lol...Its sad how many people I know who still think that they work. Not like you could just talk to someone normally, as if they were an actual person or something crazy like that.

BouCoupDinkyDau
05-08-11, 10:45 PM
Do you want to have sex with me while we eat pizza? What's wrong, don't like pizza?

BouCoupDinkyDau
05-08-11, 10:47 PM
I think alcohol plays a bigger part in guys hitting on me like that than my actual level of hotness.

I don't know. That fairy avatar is pretty hot. I think Arsonist Charlie Brown digs her.

Joker_Girl
05-08-11, 10:49 PM
I actually, in college, had a guy ask me if I would like a job planting tulips. As in TWO LIPS. Omg. Really?

Like I was gonna be like OMG YES YES take me now. Let me get my pants off, here its taking too long i will just tear them off you freaking stud.

Granted, it was in a bar, and he was probably drunk.

BouCoupDinkyDau
05-08-11, 10:53 PM
I have four words for you: Hol I Day Inn.

tipoo
05-08-11, 10:54 PM
Does this smell like chloroform?

BouCoupDinkyDau
05-08-11, 10:54 PM
I'm good at math: U + I = 69

BouCoupDinkyDau
05-08-11, 10:56 PM
Granted, it was in a bar, and he was probably drunk.

Don't make an excuse for him. Anyone lame enough to remember these lines in advance cannot use drunkenness as an excuse. :D

Rebelyell
05-08-11, 10:57 PM
Can I have a shake w them fries:D

Simenora
05-09-11, 12:31 AM
Him: "J'achete des belle chaussettes. It's french for I think you're beautiful."

Me: Je parle franšais.

Him: Never mind.

Clearly someone didn't pass french 1.

:Dha ha ha ha ha
socks!!!, now that's funny

Simenora
05-09-11, 12:35 AM
had to steal these because I don't know any

1. Your name must be Daisy, because I have the incredible urge to plant you right here!
2. Roses are red, violets are blue, I like spaghetti, let's go screw
3. Just call me milk, I'll do your body good
4. Your body's name must be visa, because it's everywhere I want to be
5. Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?
6. I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your Bed Rock
7. I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you
8. My love for you is like the energizer bunny, it keeps going and going
9. That shirt looks very becoming on you, but if I were on you, (guess what was here but it was really bad taste so I have bleeped it my self)
10. Yo Baby, you be my Dairy Queen, I'll be your Burger King, you treat me right, and I'll do it your way right away



Disclaimer; I did a google search and got 800 000 hits these were on the first page, hope they give you a laugh.I'm an old married broad. I don't go to bars.

Joker_Girl
05-09-11, 12:57 AM
My husband told me this one and it made me laugh. (Like a month ago, after nearly 16 years of marriage LOL).

"You must be a traffic ticket cause you've got FINE written all over you!"

LOL

Im sure he saw it on TV or something. If he made it up, well, I guess he was being very witty!

Kaimei
05-09-11, 03:36 AM
And: "I hear a lot of you women are inhibited and have reservations. That's what the ropes are for."

LMAO. You got hit on by someone into kink, I'm guessing. Or...someone very, very scary.

"You smoke, you drink, you're not fat, and you don't act like a child. So far, I like you."

Less of a pick-up line, but it was delivered on a first date. I'm sorry...was that supposed to be a compliment.

And -

"You're hot, and chicks in bands always put out. What kind of drink should I buy you after your show?"

Simenora
05-09-11, 03:40 AM
how bout " I have NEVER seen anyone eat BBQ ribs like that before"

tired1823
05-16-11, 12:47 AM
Wanna Dip?

...What do you mean?

I put my hand up on your hip, when I dip, you dip, we dip.

sighduck
05-22-11, 11:24 AM
If i give you a nickel, will you tickle my pickle?

BR549
05-22-11, 11:25 AM
In my alphabet, I'd put "U and I" together.

sighduck
05-22-11, 11:28 AM
In my alphabet, I'd put "U and I" together.

theres an epic comeback for that one.... "i like it just the way it is, with n and o together"

salleh
05-23-11, 03:44 AM
Nope the worst is what some guy said to me ....Hot Hot Hot afternoon, about 3 PM, across from CBS in LA, I am standing outside my bank waiting for my friend to come and pick me up ( not that way, I needed a ride back to my shop) .....I am wearing shorts...very...


I looked down the street and there's a guy walking determinedly and then straight up to me , without a pause, no slowing down ....just walk walk walk, stop......he's now about a foot away ,.....and without preamble, asks me " Wanna F***?"


I dodn't know whether to smack him upside the head or be flattered....( I was uhm ..leessee about 47 at the time, and that's not usually the kind of thing that happens to us old broads....oh , how un PC, us mature women .....that's better....)

stef
05-23-11, 04:24 AM
We went to this horrible nightclub in paris once when I was a student, and this guy came up and said "ooh you're blonde! I like swedish type women".
(I dyed my hair at the time...)

Andon
05-26-11, 02:59 AM
Hey your jewelery would look great on my bedside table ;)

Canuck223
05-26-11, 12:20 PM
I was once propositioned by a female friend in high school. I was 4-5 months between girlfriends, and she wasn't a likely candidate to become one. She was a nice girl, but off the charts on the batshiznit crazy scale.

While sitting with a group of friends,she wandered over and whispered in my ear, "My folks are out and my sister's in the city. Want to come over to my place for scotch and sex?"

"Gee, thanks, but I'm not that thirsty right now."

sarahsweets
05-26-11, 12:51 PM
Actually had someone say "would you have sex with me"

TheChemicals
05-26-11, 01:29 PM
can i get some fries with that shake baby.

jennsation
05-26-11, 09:24 PM
I like your shoes...can I light them on fire?

Someone said that to me at a bar once. And he was seriously trying to pick me up with that. Seriously. Worst EVER! LOL!