View Full Version : Ask a girl out


Conman
06-05-11, 12:02 AM
not gonna BS it. due to lousy social skills (despite my awesomeness), i dont know how to ask a girl out on a date, or relationship stuff. any tips or whatever?

NOTE: im not currently interested in anybody right now, but this'll be good for reference.

Driver
06-05-11, 12:05 AM
Approach them within 3 seconds of making eye-contact, strike up a conversation, then invite her to accompany you to something she might enjoy.

Conman
06-05-11, 12:25 AM
is it truly THAT simple? and it must be with a girl i have already talked with and become friends with though right?

Driver
06-05-11, 01:05 AM
Yes it's not rocket science. And it can be any girl.

And if the studies are anything to go by, you've got a 50:50 chance she'll say yes.

Bluerose
06-05-11, 08:10 AM
This is not intended to bring you down but…..

Imagine yourself at the age of fifty and alone. That should be enough to get you out there. Life is far too short to spend questioning yourself. Get out there and have some fun. Be yourself. Women like cute, awkward guys. It puts them at ease. And don’t let rejection get you down. :)

Some of the best authors in the world received many, many reaction notices before becoming very successful. They simply filed them away and got back to work. :p

Brob2
06-05-11, 09:56 AM
This is not intended to bring you down but…..

Imagine yourself at the age of fifty and alone. That should be enough to get you out there.

Like what's wrong with girl?!!? :(

Oh wait, I've got another year to get to my butt back in action. After that I'm apparently a bag of wrinkles wondering around looking for my virility!:eek:


;):cool:

Conman
06-05-11, 10:22 AM
look, im stupid, and lack social skills for god knows what reason. cuz when a time or 2 came for me wanting to ask a girl out, i got all tense and stuff. most likely cuz i never did it before, but i didnt ask and just as well, they were not interested or the other way. dont i know how to pick. hahahahahaha.
thanks for advice and other pearls of wisdom

Conman
06-05-11, 10:27 AM
This is not intended to bring you down but…..

Imagine yourself at the age of fifty and alone. That should be enough to get you out there. Life is far too short to spend questioning yourself. Get out there and have some fun. Be yourself. Women like cute, awkward guys. It puts them at ease. And don’t let rejection get you down. :)

Some of the best authors in the world received many, many reaction notices before becoming very successful. They simply filed them away and got back to work. :p

oh, and i dont fear rejection. the fears i do have dont interfere with life right now. i dont know why girls like cute awkward guys, but i guess ill see how that goes as opposed to the fearless hellraiser with great advice i usually am. it's ironic: i can give great advice that helps, yet at times i cant help my ****ing self. it's a laugh

Driver
06-06-11, 04:02 AM
i got all tense and stuff. most likely cuz i never did it before, but i didnt ask

Just remember: he who hesitates, masturbates.

Conman
06-06-11, 11:37 AM
Just remember: he who hesitates, masturbates.


i dont hesitate. and if i do, it turns out later i did the right thing to go back on it. 1 girl i used to be interested in turned out to be lesbian, dont i know how to pick them, but my friends said some stuff like they think she is. probably shouldves listeneds to them.

but when the time comes for dances and ****, afterwards ill start all this up and whatnot.

anonymouslyadd
06-06-11, 09:47 PM
is it truly THAT simple? and it must be with a girl i have already talked with and become friends with though right?

It actually can be quite simple, but it's something that doesn't happen overnight. Maybe a Cassanova like Driver can pull it off without practice.:rolleyes::p It's something you get better at too.

I've approached a girl right as I passed by her, because I thought she was really pretty. They love confidence, and if you can go up to someone you don't know and do it, then I think you will have a lot of success.

Start off slow at first. I would choose someone you already know and have a decent amount of comfort with.

anonymouslyadd
06-06-11, 09:48 PM
Just remember: he who hesitates, masturbates.


Jim Carrey said that ^ in the Cable Guy.

Conman
06-06-11, 09:54 PM
i thought that sounded familiar. i love that movie, dark comedies are the best genre ever.

i already feel girls im comfortable with. WAIT BEFORE YOU CHEW ME OUT. when i say feel, i mean there's a certain circle of girls i hang out with (how frequently varies), and i hug them as friends and such, i massage some because it's a former job of mine, or ill just stroke my hand down their arm or back(not all the way down back) and apologize for that in a comic manner. these are some conman shenanigans i pull with girls. and they all like it and dont mind. is that already a good comfortability level?

anonymouslyadd
06-06-11, 10:01 PM
i thought that sounded familiar. i love that movie, dark comedies are the best genre ever.

i already feel girls im comfortable with. WAIT BEFORE YOU CHEW ME OUT. when i say feel, i mean there's a certain circle of girls i hang out with (how frequently varies), and i hug them as friends and such, i massage some because it's a former job of mine, or ill just stroke my hand down their arm or back(not all the way down back) and apologize for that in a comic manner. these are some conman shenanigans i pull with girls. and they all like it and dont mind. is that already a good comfortability level?

If they are comfortable enough to let you give them a massage, that means there's a good comfort level to me. It seems like you have the social interactions there with a lot of success. The next step is to figure out which one you want to be with. Then, you can ask them out on a date. Don't look at it like a date though! Look at it as an opportunity to get to know someone better.

Conman
06-06-11, 10:10 PM
aaaaahh...ill do that when i feel interested. i guess im sorta interested, but im more looking to maybe doing a dance with them, then following it up with datesy stuffs.

RedHairedWitch
06-06-11, 10:15 PM
"Wow, you're amazing, I would love to take you out for dinner." either she says yes or she says no.

Another good one. "You're so cute/beautiful/smart/awesome you make me nervous, but I just gotta ask you out!"

Conman
06-06-11, 10:30 PM
"Wow, you're amazing, I would love to take you out for dinner." either she says yes or she says no.

Another good one. "You're so cute/beautiful/smart/awesome you make me nervous, but I just gotta ask you out!"


about dinner....im in high school and have little to no job. im going to avoid the dinner idea aside from maybe grabbing food at a concert.

RedHairedWitch
06-06-11, 11:12 PM
So get some take out from Subway or McDonald's or whatever and take her to the park, or riverside ... light a candle or something, lay out a blanket. Romantic picnic for the win!

Conman
06-06-11, 11:20 PM
eh. why not. ill try to find a park, or a river in the heights.

Conman
06-06-11, 11:45 PM
Oh. im in a poke war with a girl i met at a party, and have talked to regularly enough since then. but she started poke war after i did my trademark awesome advice, yet cant help my own sorry ***. so i assume this is more than enough comfortability.

Andon
06-11-11, 03:30 AM
girls are soooooo easy, but they suck up all your time it gets annoying.

Brob2
06-11-11, 04:00 AM
"Wow, you're amazing, I would love to take you out for dinner." either she says yes or she says no.

Another good one. "You're so cute/beautiful/smart/awesome you make me nervous, but I just gotta ask you out!"

Let me try this first Conman and I'll let you know how it goes.

Witchy, you're amazing, you love dawgies as much I do it seems, and your passion to help folks really shows in your contributions to this forum. It would be an honour for me to have a such beautiful red haired woman on my arm for dinner. My treat! What do you think????

Conman
06-11-11, 11:17 AM
sure. that sounds like it would go well. ill just morph it into my own context naturally.

Pears
06-18-11, 08:33 PM
How do you take a girl on a date when your parents won't even let you have a gf, and you have to ask them for the money also?

Conman
06-18-11, 09:22 PM
where did you get those ideas from? my parents would be downright throwing a party if i got a girlfriend, and probably help out with money at some point, like prom since my school is a piece of **** and demands about $200 for prom

Aspie101
06-27-11, 06:31 PM
Go up to them and give them a ridiculously impressive confident compliment (IN PERSON) and walk away. Magically receive Facebook message from them the next day with their phone number. Well that's what I did with my girlfriend lol it may or may not get you a date but then again I guess you have to take risks. She basically said it was the sweetest thing ever but I'm going to go on a hunch and say that some other girls might find it stalker-lishish! :D:D Haha.

Anyways I'm in highschool (well just graduated!) and have no licence on account of my laziness and neither does my girlfriend so that is always a pain BUT not a reason not to date! Just go and be confident and social, talk to her like a human being, listen when she talks and show interest and try and relate your stories but not excessively or intrusively. Don't try and make any moves on the first date or anything and just be all "There" what I mean is think about the conversation not how ****** nervous you are, trying to imagine her with minimal clothing or quoting her interests from Facebook. Poke a little fun at her too, girls are really easy to make laugh and even more so if they like you...I mean jeez I'm pretty funny sometimes but for example last night I was operating on maybe 4 hours of sleep and I was on the phone with my girlfriend and like by the time it hit 12 at night I think spaghetti started coming out of my mouth but she still laughed and was understanding. I'm no expert BUT that seams to be the general concesus among people I know who have dated allot more than me. Good luck! If you have any questions feel free to PM me I enjoy helping people out if I can :):)

Spacemaster
06-27-11, 07:23 PM
I'm a girl, although I'm kind of a weird one, so I don't know if I can accurately speak for my sex. Anyway, as long as a guy is respectful in his approach, whether or not I'm interested, I'll at least be nice in my response. Even if I'm not interested, I still enjoy the flattery, I'm insecure to the max! The worst she can say is "no", and if so, move along to the next girl.

Conman
06-28-11, 12:16 AM
well thank you for the ideas. ill be sure to keep these things in mind should i find me a girl, or continue from a homecoming date if i get one, with dopes to infinity, i will.

MMetelli13
06-28-11, 12:41 AM
it's ironic: i can give great advice that helps, yet at times i cant help my ****ing self. it's a laugh

The story of our lives my friend! I was helping my friend through job anxieties and now I'm having them and having a hard time being consoled!

Brob2
06-28-11, 01:51 AM
Let me try this first Conman and I'll let you know how it goes.

Witchy, you're amazing, you love dawgies as much I do it seems, and your passion to help folks really shows in your contributions to this forum. It would be an honour for me to have a such beautiful red haired woman on my arm for dinner. My treat! What do you think????

Conman, RHW never responded to what should have been an irresistible invitation:eek: so scratch my suggestion and I too will look to be educated by this thread.;)

Conman
06-28-11, 10:43 AM
i doubt you were serious. probably a ****s and giggles invitation to see what happened

Spikey
06-28-11, 10:18 PM
Try saying something ridiculously flattering in the middle of a normal conversation. Not kidding. (Example below, taken from the conversation in which the last person I dated asked me out).

"So, yeah, this trip is awesome. I can't wait to go hiking tomorrow."

"Yeah, hiking is fun. I'm going upstate this weekend too. You're as beautiful as Athena. I really like you. Will you please go out with me?" (You should say Aphrodite, not Athena, unless you REALLY think she'll enjoy correcting you and telling you that Athena, as one of the virgin goddesses would have been rather unhappy with him having said that to her).

"... What? Excuse me?"

"Um. Heh. Will you go out with me?"

It eventually worked we were on the phone while I was away on a school trip. Worst she can say is no.

NOTE: It probably helped him that I preferred to be compared to Athena than Aphrodite though.

You COULD purposefully screw up the goddess and say "You're as beautiful as _____" insert the goddess that closest resembles one of her favorite traits about herself. This may not work as well if she doesn't know the Greek gods well though.

Conman
06-28-11, 11:50 PM
err? just spontaneously stick an 'ask me out thingy' in the middle of an actual conversation we're having?

Conman
08-27-11, 11:10 PM
well homecoming season is hitting my school now and since im a senior im actually going to try and make this year good. any creative ideas on how to ask a girl to homecoming?

Blueranne
08-27-11, 11:12 PM
No, but I am sooo glad I am not in high school anymore... **shudder**

Conman
08-27-11, 11:18 PM
screw you, be thankful every day of your life. it's just a social nightmare

but i need answers

Blueranne
08-27-11, 11:25 PM
Sorry Conman, me and my friends never went to homecoming. In stead we pooled all of the money we would have spent and threw our own party. Of course I have nothing to compare it to but I highly suspect we had a lot more fun that way.

tired1823
08-28-11, 01:30 PM
I think asking people to homecoming in creative ways is a new thing that started with reality tv shows filming high schoolers doing that kind of thing. When I was in high school all it ever was was, "will you go to homecoming with me." I probably wouldn't be able to help you out with a creative idea. It sounds like fun though! Maybe you could google it.

Conman
08-28-11, 03:24 PM
too many sites and too many ways mushed together in a sentence to help.

anonymouslyadd
08-28-11, 03:48 PM
How about you find out a trendy place where a girl would buy a dress? Then, you ask her out, kinda like a date and just *happen* to walk past this store. You spot a nice dress (on a manikin) and tell her how she would look amazing in it. You give her a second (she's gushing with joy because of your compliment). You say, "it would be an honor to me if you would come with me to homecoming and wear that dress."

I don't know Conman. Do you have the girl picked out?

tired1823
08-28-11, 04:02 PM
edit: nevermind. I read it wrong.

Conman
08-28-11, 04:07 PM
dont really have one picked out yet, im working on that. i need more a method to ask so im ready for whoever it may be

tired1823
08-28-11, 05:03 PM
oh, and i dont fear rejection. the fears i do have dont interfere with life right now. i dont know why girls like cute awkward guys, but i guess ill see how that goes as opposed to the fearless hellraiser with great advice i usually am. it's ironic: i can give great advice that helps, yet at times i cant help my ****ing self. it's a laugh

Me too Conman. I think you have the right plan down for yourself, though. You're on a great path. If you're like me you worry about nothing. You are really doing well in everyone else's eyes, but it's hard to just sit back and enjoy things sometimes.

I don't think you have to know the girl and be friends with her.. but maybe you do. How many options do you have? Which girl do you think you'd have the most fun with?

anonymouslyadd
08-28-11, 05:14 PM
it's ironic: i can give great advice that helps, yet at times i cant help my ****ing self. it's a laugh


We, as in ADDers, have a hard time solving our own problems.

tired1823
08-28-11, 05:23 PM
We, as in ADDers, have a hard time solving our own problems.

ain't that the truth.

Conman
08-28-11, 05:37 PM
i have maybe 3 options. maybe.

tired1823
08-28-11, 05:45 PM
I was soo happy when my friend asked me to go to a dance with him. I wasn't expecting it. I wasn't even thinking about it. If it weren't for him I would have been dateless maybe. Looking back I'm really glad he stepped up and did that. I was really happy he was my date.

Conman
08-28-11, 06:06 PM
problem: cant telepathically know if a girl is thinking that or not

tired1823
08-28-11, 06:16 PM
problem: cant telepathically know if a girl is thinking that or not

I didn't realize it until today actually. Just looking back, that's how it happened. I wasn't thinking about him asking me out. I wasn't worried about anyone asking me to go. Point was.. the guy was worried about it. And I appreciate that now. Kind of like what you are doing right now. It's a good thing. Is there a girl that likes to hang out with you? chances are she'd want to go with you.

Conman
08-28-11, 06:53 PM
more problem: social skills suck, and people like being with me when im there, but dont make effort otherwise. girls like me cuz im funny, but ive never really hung out with girls. and if i have, it was with other people there too, guys dont hang out with girls solo, or else it means theyre dating.

tired1823
08-28-11, 06:59 PM
more problem: social skills suck, and people like being with me when im there, but dont make effort otherwise. girls like me cuz im funny, but ive never really hung out with girls. and if i have, it was with other people there too, guys dont hang out with girls solo, or else it means theyre dating.

I never hung out one on one with this guy. It was always at school and in class. There were always other people there if it was outside of school. He was definitely just a friend/acquaintance. I'm sure some girls think they are in the same boat as you as far as social skills go.

Alex9
08-28-11, 07:07 PM
more problem: social skills suck, and people like being with me when im there, but dont make effort otherwise. girls like me cuz im funny, but ive never really hung out with girls. and if i have, it was with other people there too, guys dont hang out with girls solo, or else it means theyre dating.

Wow I feel like I'm in the same boat, except I'm not sure if my social skills actually "suck" or not.

Another problem for me is that I don't really understand how girls view me. They generally think I'm funny but I'm not sure if they think I'm "cool" or someone they would actually consider dating.

Also, most of the girls who I can tell like me are not girls that I want to date at all. I'm not one of those people who doesn't like people if they're not popular, but I don't think I should date someone who I don't like who doesn't have good looks or a good personality. Maybe I'm too picky, but I don't really think I am.

Conman
08-28-11, 07:12 PM
there's a psycho who is ugly i might add, cuz if she was a hot psycho i could work with that; who was kinda obssessed with me last year but i kept shrugging her off and ignoring her. so now she hates me, but im glad she hates me.

i think my social skills just suck. my brother pointed this out to me about a year ago when i just downright thought i wasnt attractive, it's not that, my social skills are bad and as such i think im unattractive.


i agree with the girl viewing. they all know im funny and confident, but dont know me that well. and most girls that know me well are too hot and high status to be with me, and already in realtionships.

but back to the main thing here: creative ways to ask

anonymouslyadd
08-28-11, 07:23 PM
more problem: social skills suck, and people like being with me when im there, but dont make effort otherwise. girls like me cuz im funny, but ive never really hung out with girls. and if i have, it was with other people there too, guys dont hang out with girls solo, or else it means theyre dating.

Girls love for a guy to make them laugh. You got that. I don't think your social skills suck man. I've hung out with my friend solo, and we've never dated or hooked up. Having a girl as a friend is actually a great resource.

Thoughts ARE really important to us Conman. If we think something like I'm lazy, it will get in our heads and prevent us from doing what we want. In your case, "ask a girl out."

I know you can do this. I know it.

Alex9
08-28-11, 07:48 PM
Also, it doesn't help my confidence that I recently got rejected in quite possibly the most humiliating way ever.

So, I got a voicemail from this girl, saying she wanted to hang out sometime. I knew that because of status (she is pretty good looking and popular and it was pretty much out of nowhere) that something was kind of fishy. But I texted her anyways, no response. Finally a couple days later, I called her and told her that I got her voicemail and that I would like to hang out and she said she had no idea what I was talking about. This means that either it was a really good prank call/fake voicemail or she just decided to mess with me. I still don't know what exactly happened, but it was one of the most awkward and humiliating things to happen to me in a while.

I keep trying to tell myself that it was a good prank and that it wasn't my falt, but it made me scared of rejection again just when I started to be more adventurous when it came to dealing with girls. It's a situation where I took one step forward but 2 steps back.

anonymouslyadd
08-28-11, 08:16 PM
So, I got a voicemail from this girl, saying she wanted to hang out sometime. I knew that because of status (she is pretty good looking and popular and it was pretty much out of nowhere) that something was kind of fishy. But I texted her anyways, no response. Finally a couple days later, I called her and told her that I got her voicemail and that I would like to hang out and she said she had no idea what I was talking about. This means that either it was a really good prank call/fake voicemail or she just decided to mess with me. I still don't know what exactly happened, but it was one of the most awkward and humiliating things to happen to me in a while.

I keep trying to tell myself that it was a good prank and that it wasn't my falt, but it made me scared of rejection again just when I started to be more adventurous when it came to dealing with girls. It's a situation where I took one step forward but 2 steps back.

I can understand why it affected you this way. That was a cruel thing to do.

Alex9
08-28-11, 08:35 PM
Ok so back to how to ask a girl to homecoming:

I think the best way is to just approach the girl and say something like "Hey, I was wondering if you'd go to homecoming with me?" Keep it simple.

Also, if you're going to ask a girl to anything, it can be helpful if you're friends with one of her friends. Usually, a girl's friends can help get you an idea of the girl's thoughts and even how likely she would be to say yes if you asked her. Just be careful though because sometimes using this strategy can backfire and "blow your cover" so to speak.

pechemignonne
08-28-11, 08:48 PM
Seriously, if someone likes you, and they want to go with you, it won't matter how you ask. As long as you're nice about it, of course.

And if they don't like you, and don't want to go with you, it probably won't matter either.

I think people get this idea from movies and tv that you have to do something big and exciting. Just ask.

Conman
08-28-11, 09:37 PM
yeah but everybody does do something creative

tired1823
08-28-11, 09:41 PM
hmm, i'm thinking something with flowers... maybe you could get her a bouquet with a note in it and have it either sent to her room or the office for her to pick up.

tired1823
08-28-11, 09:42 PM
Or.. if it's a specific girl.. think of an inside joke between you all.. let us know and maybe we can work on it based on that.

tired1823
08-28-11, 09:43 PM
does she have a parking space? or does she drive to school?

Conman
08-28-11, 10:01 PM
i think i may haveth an idea. one of said option girls really likes dark chocolate. maybe i tamper a bar somehow to have a homecoming? message in it, on it, something

tired1823
08-28-11, 10:03 PM
yeaa! You can also order m&ms that have things written on them. I'm not sure if you can get dark chocolate m&m's but.. I bet you could do something with a dark chocolate bar!

anonymouslyadd
08-28-11, 10:05 PM
yeaa! You can also order m&ms that have things written on them. I'm not sure if you can get dark chocolate m&m's but.. I bet you could do something with a dark chocolate bar!


LOL....:p

tired1823
08-28-11, 10:06 PM
http://www.chocolate.com/dark-chocolate/
You could write on the white cardboard part that she'll see when she opens it.

tired1823
08-28-11, 10:14 PM
LOL....:p
haha, I tried but I can't figure out what you're laughing at

anonymouslyadd
08-28-11, 10:14 PM
haha, I tried but I can't figure out what you're laughing at

I think you're funny. You just crack me up.

tired1823
08-28-11, 10:16 PM
haha, ok good! my pleasure. Conman that is a great idea, though!

Conman
08-28-11, 10:24 PM
sweetness

tired1823
08-28-11, 10:28 PM
bitter sweetness

Conman
08-28-11, 10:44 PM
dare i ask what that means?

tired1823
08-28-11, 10:55 PM
haha, dark chocolate is bitter sweet

anonymouslyadd
08-28-11, 10:57 PM
haha, dark chocolate is bitter sweet

I didn't know that.

Alex9
08-28-11, 10:57 PM
lol that's actually pretty sick

Conman
08-28-11, 11:03 PM
haha, dark chocolate is bitter sweet

ok dont do any goofy omen stuff on me now.

tired1823
08-28-11, 11:11 PM
uuh... don't worry. i don't know what youre talkin about. :)

Rebelyell
08-28-11, 11:20 PM
Give me the damn candy bar then I'll eat it:D

Spacemaster
08-28-11, 11:25 PM
I've been missing from this thread for a while, but I gotta say I love it! I'm in a committed relationship, and have been for a while. I need constant stimulation and excitement, and well, let's face it. The same old person gets boring after a while.

I miss that new relationship excitement. Does he like me? Should I get up the courage to ask him out? How will it all pan out?

Since I am off the market, it's fun for me to be an observer. I have to live vicariously through Conman. I'm pulling for you!

You could do it like in the movies and stand outside her window with a boombox, blaring a cheesy love song while declaring your love. with a bouquet of daisies. :p

Conman
08-29-11, 07:17 AM
A-i dont know where she lives
2-...no

Alex9
09-01-11, 06:46 PM
Just let your adhd take over and just impulsively ask her in the first way you think of.

Impulsiveness is your friend sometimes, especially when dealing with girls

Conman
09-01-11, 09:21 PM
when you say the first way i think of, you mean just all-out ask her or elaborate cutesy accepted methods of society?

johnny_walker
09-01-11, 10:30 PM
Just let your adhd take over and just impulsively ask her in the first way you think of.

Impulsiveness is your friend sometimes, especially when dealing with girls

Yep, Johnny did it and he never looked back ever again. :)