View Full Version : Do you know when girls are interested?


cybrix101
10-11-11, 05:50 PM
I can never work out when girls are flirting with me, this is a major downfall of mine. I will chat with anyone when at work, and i chat to a lot of girl as i work in a nightclub. But I can never work out when girls are being friendly or flirting with me. It is very frustrating, especially when you find out weeks/months later that the really nice girl you have been chatting to for ages was trying to flirt with you but gave up as you never caught on!

Is this normal for people? Working with lots of doormen that seem to get any girl they want it frustrates me that i cant work out if someone is interested in me, and i cant for the life of me chat ladies up!!!

Ahh, rant over! I think i've posted more today than i ever have over the last year of being on this forum, but everything seems to have boiled over today and i needed to rant! I'm sure others know the feeling!!!

pechemignonne
10-11-11, 05:52 PM
You could always try asking them out...

cybrix101
10-11-11, 06:28 PM
Lol, but then if they say no, I've lost someone who could be a friend instead! That has worked out badly for me in the past where girls who thought we were "just friends" have been offended when i asked them out on a date!

scars
10-11-11, 06:57 PM
You'll never know if you don't ask. Just be cool and shrug it off if you get rejected, they aren't going to not be your friend because they said no. Also work on how you ask the girl out.

For instance,

"Hey I'm going to see a (insert movie or other activity here) Friday night at 7pm and was wondering if you'd like to go with me?"

If she says no, then shrug it off, but make sure you go do that activity anyway so she doesn't think it was just for a date. :p

QuantumIguana
10-12-11, 02:17 PM
I remember when I was a teenager, there was one girl who was laughing at my jokes when no one else was. Now, I know my jokes merited no more than perhaps a chuckle, so I figured that she might be interested me. The funny thing was that this made me rather uncomfortable. The reason for this was that if no one was interested in me, that was safe, you knew what you were getting. But someone who seemed to be interested in me, well, that was fraught with danger. I might be mistaken and embarrass myself - things that are minor embarrassments for others tend to be major for me, and I remember them when most people forget them quickly. And if she really is interested, how should I proceed?

So, rather than taking the next step and talking directly to her, I just sort of drifted along. But the thing is, if you ask someone out, and they aren't interested, they are just going to say no, they aren't really going to be offended. I fully realize it doesn't FEEL like that. I would suggest not trying to jump into a relationship all at once. A date doesn't mean you are a couple, it's just step one of seeing if you are really compatible.

RedHairedWitch
10-12-11, 03:57 PM
A woman worth dating, or being a friend, will be cool if you tell her "hey, I am not very good at this flirting thing, if you are into me, let me know."

Aside from that, girls who are flirting will do things like stand or sit really close to you, touch you (like playing with your hair) and will show off (play with her hair, brag about something she is good at)

Hints might include asking if you are single, asking if you are busy on the weekend, asking about the kind of things you like to do, learning what you like in your coffee or what your favourite food is

It's okay to gently tease a girl and be like "are you flirting with me? "

Rebelyell
10-12-11, 09:26 PM
RHW you need to start charging for your priceless advice and before ya know it you'll be a gazillionaire.Yes us guys are that clueless especially the adhd 1s

anonymouslyadd
10-12-11, 09:40 PM
A woman worth dating, or being a friend, will be cool if you tell her "hey, I am not very good at this flirting thing, if you are into me, let me know."

Why? Can you explain this more? How would she be ok with that?

Abi
10-12-11, 09:48 PM
I *think* I know.

Then again it happens rarely, so maybe I'm missing some... :confused:

BR549
10-12-11, 09:51 PM
A woman worth dating, or being a friend, will be cool if you tell her "hey, I am not very good at this flirting thing, if you are into me, let me know."

Aside from that, girls who are flirting will do things like stand or sit really close to you, touch you (like playing with your hair) and will show off (play with her hair, brag about something she is good at)

Hints might include asking if you are single, asking if you are busy on the weekend, asking about the kind of things you like to do, learning what you like in your coffee or what your favourite food is

It's okay to gently tease a girl and be like "are you flirting with me? "

It's always nice when you are unsure if a guy is into you if they will just come out with it. Especially if you are trying really hard to figure out how he feels. Sometimes flirting just doesn't cut it. If the guy is really shy or unsure of himself it may take him ages to finally realize that you are interested in him. Simply because he can't believe that anyone could be interested in him.

RHW, you've pretty much nailed it.

One thing to add is that girls will also make it a point to be where you are going to be. If you go to the break room at 12 each day to get your lunch, she will find some excuse to be there as well. She will find reasons to be near your desk at work or walk the same route you walk to class. She will go out of her way to make sure she sees you and that you see her. Even if it's just to smile or say hi.

KronarTheBlack
10-12-11, 10:48 PM
I just assume all girls are flirting with me cuz I am so devilishly handsome :0

RedHairedWitch
10-13-11, 02:38 AM
Why? Can you explain this more? How would she be ok with that?


Most women would be cool about a guy being straight forward that he is not the world's best flirt. We don't actually expect you to be perfect. Not those of us worth spending time with, anyways.

Most women would be worried that they themselves are not being a good enough flirt, especially if he doesn't seem to be getting the signal! :rolleyes:

There's a young man at my workplace who is a quite the ladies man. He actully said something the other day to another coworker about meeting women it was something like: Just talk to her, walk right up and say something, even if it's stupid. Sometimes stupid is good, it will make her laugh. What's the worst that can happen?

Apparently this strategy works for him. I'm not surprised.

Driver
10-13-11, 08:58 AM
Here's what you do: grab your favorite female friend (yes, I'm generalising, I know some girls are clueless too), take her to a nightclub, club, pub, cafe, bar, etc, grab a table in the corner and sit there and casually watch people. Ask her to point out the girls who are flirting with guys, and the ones who are showing absolutely no interest in the guy who's trying their luck.

In no time, you'll learn the signs.

mr_goodwrench
10-24-11, 10:27 AM
I have traditionally been almost completely oblivious to women flirting with me. Every woman I have ever dated had to essentially ask me out.

I met my wife at a dead end factory job that I took after I dropped out of college. We worked in the same area and would sit and talk our entire shift. On breaks, we always hung out and chit-chatted and most days, we ate lunch together (albeit in a group) After about a month and a half of this, she finally cornered me and asked if I was ever going to ask her out on a date! This year, we celebrated our 14th anniversary.

Now, the only way I know if a woman is flirting with me is when my wife gets angry about it... grocery cashier, waitress, etc.

sarahsweets
10-24-11, 03:43 PM
A girl is defiantly interested if she takes her clothes off in front of you. ;)

anonymouslyadd
10-24-11, 05:08 PM
I was at a bar the other night with this band I promote. I stood at the end of the bar where servers would go underneath to obtain whatever they needed from behind the bar. At the front of the bar, three giggling girls sat looking at me and then whispering to each other. They repeated. I think one remained interested in me, but I'm not sure.:)