View Full Version : Is Church a good thing if you dont believe in it?


TheChemicals
02-26-12, 01:53 PM
A girl at work started going to church because she has some marital problems. She also has some strong emotions that make her cry and getting btchy at her man. She admits she gets angry and mean and doesnt want to be like that so she started going to Church. I dont think anything is wrong with her but she did tell me i should go to church to so that i can live a normal and better life and possibly meet a stable companion.

Should i go to church even though i am not religious? I always feel weird or awkward in place that i dont agree with but maybe i need something to fill the emptyness and meet healthy minded people?

nevermessymind
02-26-12, 06:14 PM
I think it can be a good thing if you are open-minded.

And as long as you understand that "the church" itself probably won't fill your empty feeling. God has filled that need for me through the church.

And as long as you understand that the church is full of very imperfect people (even the ones who seem to have it all together) who are there (for the most part) because they want to know the God who loves them in spite of it.

strengthouweak
02-26-12, 06:31 PM
it wouldn't hurt, just as long as you respect and encourage others beliefs while you're there.

I think you will gain a lot of knowledge, you just have to respect the members and let them know, you are observing and are not a believer, in some way or another, at least with people you are going to talk to, because that could get awkward.

if you are comfortable with doing so, Let us know how it goes.......

Kunga Dorji
02-26-12, 06:55 PM
Just keep an open mind.

I left the Christian Church because of the poor quality of the spiritual friendship available in the particular churches I had access to, and because I did not agree with the model being thrust down my throat.

I am a committed Tibetan Buddhist now- but have a deep and positive relationship with many committed Christians.

Watch for bossy, controlling behaviour, especially people who try to impose their truths on you.

In my path we are encouraged to experiment- try the teachings and see if they bring happiness to ourselves and those round us and to see if the trying brings more friends, more kindness and love into our circle. ( It does- those who know me will know that at surface level my life looks pretty chaotic right now. Equally- I can be pretty outspoken- and even now will call someone out if I feel they are not being real. At a deeper level I am still, at peace and surrounded by loving friends. The fact that I can be outspoken just means I see, and I care).

I know many Christians who have exactly the same experience in their churches- and I have the deepest respect for people like these, even tough our "surface level" paths are so different- allegedly!

As far as the Christian teachings go- I stick as closely as possible to Christ's words, rather than somebody else's idea of how they should be interpreted.

Be open to the true power and love in what is said there.

Fuzzy12
02-26-12, 07:03 PM
It depends on what you are looking for. If you are looking for a new experience and to meet some new people, then I'd say go for it.

I don't see though how going to church will help you lead a normal and better life, in particular if you aren't religious or aren't going there for any spiritual purpose.

I doubt that everyone who goes to church is necessarily healthy minded or that you can find healthy minded people only in church.

I feel empty at times but it's not a void I can fill with religion. I mean, I can't make myself believe in something that doesn't make sense to me just to fill the void with something.

trishcan
02-26-12, 07:17 PM
I'll admit that at times, I've given brief consideration to checking out the Unitarian church in my city. It's non-denominational and they're involved in a lot of social justice-related work that I respect. They also have singles mixers, which appeals to my total desperation.

ginniebean
02-26-12, 07:21 PM
I tend to think not. While there are a lot of churches that play to the 50's Americana wholesomeness unfortunately many are let down by that. I do think there is a need for meaning and depth in everyone's life but you may find it just as well in a philosophy club or something of that nature. There is no harm in checking it out and seeing if it suits you tho. It's never worked for me.

TygerSan
02-26-12, 08:52 PM
Should i go to church even though i am not religious? I always feel weird or awkward in place that i dont agree with but maybe i need something to fill the emptyness and meet healthy minded people?

I think that one of the things that strengthens people's bonds with their congregations/religious communities is a sense of belonging to a group of like-minded individuals. I do think that visiting surrounding congregations may not be a bad thing for anyone to do, but you have to think about what you want to get out of the experience.

I would second the encouragement to find a Unitarian Church or similar-minded congregation. Disclaimer is that because UU churches are congregational in polity, there's a *lot* of difference between the individual congregations. Some are overtly Christian, and others lean very heavily secular humanist (and thus eschew references to "God" all together).

If you're athiest, you may also want to check out secular humanist organizations like the Ethical societies.

Kunga Dorji
02-26-12, 09:50 PM
I tend to think not. While there are a lot of churches that play to the 50's Americana wholesomeness unfortunately many are let down by that. I do think there is a need for meaning and depth in everyone's life but you may find it just as well in a philosophy club or something of that nature. There is no harm in checking it out and seeing if it suits you tho. It's never worked for me.

One of the great pleasures for me since I have come to my senses is that I reallyblove the company of my fellow travellers along my path ( well - most of them anyway!)

Yes - I am having a good time, and have met some very kind friends where I am.

Andrew

sarahsweets
02-26-12, 10:55 PM
Church or any religious group is what youget out of it. I get my spiritual connection at home.

karbouris
02-27-12, 12:36 AM
Church or any religious group is what youget out of it. I get my spiritual connection at home.
I have to do this. LOL. My mind wanders too much at church. My mind is like, I wonder if I am going to lunch after this. Oh Shony's sounds good. OMFG I used to go to shoneys after church when I was little. Oh man I used to ride forwheelers when I was a kid. I wonder how much another 4 wheeler would cost. ETC. Why is time going so slow... XD You get it.

randoreds
02-27-12, 02:42 AM
I would say no. If you have add, you'll be bored as hell. And anyway, people aren't genuine at church. It's pretty brother some.
No need to waste your life praying to something you don't believe in.

TheChemicals
02-27-12, 01:57 PM
I would do it for like 2-3months and then quit and ignore all the people i met there and eventually see them on the street and avoid them like the plague. Pretty much story of my life. Better to have 1-2 friends and a woman than try to be part of some large community that i dont have the energy or commitment to follow up on. Thanks for your feedback, i believe what i hear here more than anywhere else because everyone else is an idiot when you arent add and still trying to give advice through their own normal brain.

Abi
02-27-12, 01:59 PM
No.

===

Rebelyell
02-27-12, 02:20 PM
:yes:Yes Im all for the church of four wheelers!:giggle:

Bluerose
02-27-12, 05:40 PM
Just a thought but when I was really struggling with life in general I choose to read the bible in order to stay grounded and cope with life. It worked. It didn’t change my deep down beliefs but it did help me through a really tough time. I say go with the flow. Whatever gets you through the night. Go for it.

oneup
02-27-12, 06:48 PM
If you're an atheist and have no interest in learning or converting to the religion then it will be a waste to attend services, you'll just get really bored. Some churches have volunteer organizations--these can be a good thing to participate in and help out people less fortunate, whether or not your religious, it still feels good to help peoples out.

TheChemicals
02-27-12, 07:25 PM
Yeh i want to help in those kind of volunteer activities but my energy levels are too erratic and i would end up being the guy who didnt show for the "battered wives" volunteer program, and then id really feel bad.

Raumvogel
02-27-12, 07:30 PM
:yes:Yes Im all for the church of four wheelers!:giggle:

Yes! wide open spaces, sunshine...god's country!

Abi
02-27-12, 07:35 PM
Yeh i want to help in those kind of volunteer activities but my energy levels are too erratic and i would end up being the guy who didnt show for the "battered wives" volunteer program, and then id really feel bad.

BS. You'd be the guy who battered someone's wife :D

Just kidding.

I know.. the fear of being a disappointment sucks.. and means we do even LESS than we are inclines to (which is already very little).

Aaah, life in the neuropsych lane. :|

TheChemicals
02-27-12, 08:04 PM
BS. You'd be the guy who battered someone's wife :D

Just kidding.

I know.. the fear of being a disappointment sucks.. and means we do even LESS than we are inclines to (which is already very little).

Aaah, life in the neuropsych lane. :|

some women love to be lightly battered and dipped.

In high school i volunteered to help out in a daycare center for inner city kids....One kid was like magnetized to me and we hung out all the time. When my hours were complete i stopped going and didnt even say goodbye. Id like to say i didnt care and wanted only my hours but the memory is pretty etched in my brain and its not a positive one. Im convinced church is a bad idea at this time.

Spacemaster
02-27-12, 08:28 PM
I drew a cartoon of a battered woman once. Sorry, off topic. but it's true.:lol:
She was laying on the plate next to a bunch of french fries.

Insensitive? You can say so, but I thought of it after I had been a victim of domestic assault. I find humor in EVERYTHING.

I used to close all the curtains on sunday morning in the hopes that my parents wouldn't wake up on time for church because it was still dark in the house. As if THAT worked. I was a little kid, OK? I had to sit still during the entire service, and I couldn't even have color crayons because to sit in church and color was disrespectful! :eek: So...I sat there. I sat there and counted the minutes until it was over.