View Full Version : How do u know if counseling is for u?

11-19-04, 12:39 AM
How do u know if u need counseling? I think it would be of benift to me, but I am unsure. Any adivice?

11-19-04, 03:13 AM
Here's my advice: find a therapist, make sure it's someone you like, maybe see if he/she has dealt with adults with ADD before, and give it a shot. Worst case, therapy rarely has negative side effects, even when done badly. It takes a completely irresponsible therapist to do any kind of actual harm; you might not make progress, but I wouldn't expect to pick up any new problems by going to therapy.

11-19-04, 10:09 AM
progress is subjective
best thing you can do is try it
if you don't like it you don't have to keep going do you?
just keep in mind, therapy can be painful
painful in a good way- it takes a lot of introspection and
that can be painful when you have to be utterly honest with yourself..
i personally love my therapy

11-19-04, 11:24 AM
In meeting with a therapist for the first time one of the things he/she will consider is whether or not there is a medical necessity for counseling. If, for example, a coach might be more appropriate then I would hope that would also be discussed. On the other hand, if the reason for the referral is more suited for a therapist, then I hope you find someone you can connect with, who also knows what they're doing. Good luck.

11-19-04, 11:26 AM
Do the thing, have the power. :)

11-19-04, 01:39 PM
Most people ADD and non-ADD can benefit from a good therapist or counselor. One main reason for choosing therapy over coaching would be because there are issues in your past which are preventing you from moving forward. So a therapist would help you deal with a lot of the past issues before moving forward in your life. A coach pretty much works in the present and future to help you move forward. A lot of people work with both a therapist and an ADD Coach.

11-19-04, 05:56 PM
Any suggestions on how to find a good therapist?

11-19-04, 06:41 PM
All I can say it have a chat with them on the phone & see if you connect. Therapy can be good for exploring buried troublesome emotions and it can also be useful like a coach to get the professional opinions and knowledge of someone who has spent years in school studying how the mind works. My mother says it's essential because trying to change on your own is just impossible because we tend to build up incredibly complicated and convincing rationalizations for our mis-behavior and it's necessary to have a detatched viewpoint to assess when we might be fooling ourselves. Personally I've got a lot of emotional pain in my past and therapists always seem to zone in on that & frankly it gets old after a while going over that crap again & again. There are some other novel treatments like eye movement desensitization therapy which supposedly have magic powers for unveiling repressed emotions and psychodrama is another one you can search for here with the potential for digging out those deep emotional blocks. I have benefited from crying sessions in therapy but only to a certain point then it's like they are tyrying to keep you addicted to the emotional vulnerability aspect of that & it seems like too much dwelling on the negative but certainly it's worth going through that stuff a couple times & feels good to get out of your system.

11-20-04, 12:53 AM
I don't know if I would say I have issues from my past, but there are things from my past I do think about often. For instance, my freshman year of college i took a psych class. The prof was a psychologist. After the first class I disclosed to her that I was ADD and LD. She told me I was more then welcome to come up to her office and talk to her about it anytime. Well she offered this on numerous occasions, but I never took advantage of it. Its been 5 years or so, and I still think about it. And the what ifs.....what if I had gone up and talked to her.....what if I got put on meds again.....what if...... The list goes on. I have thought so many times about driving up there and just showing up at her office and saying I need to talk. But that sounds kinda crazy don't u think? Plus, would she still remember me??

11-24-04, 12:19 AM
Any thoughts on my above post would be greatly appreciated!

11-24-04, 11:23 AM
It doesn't sound crazy to me. However, you might want to consider choosing a therapist to work with if the professor in question doesn't have a private practice on the side. Either way, it makes sense to me. As far as "what if's?" go, I try to avoid that type of thinking because it will only make you more anxious.There's no closure to that question,so my standard comeback is "What if aliens were on my roof?" I also remember a Saturday Night Live skit from about 10yrs ago that was entitled, "What if Superman Had Been A Nazi During WWII?" Suffice to say those are irrational questions.The old mantra from Rational Behavior Therapy (RBT) still rings true tho...." Everything Is As It Should Be." Good luck and remember to be good to yourself and give yourself a break.:)

12-01-04, 11:23 PM
It seems to me that there is something behind the fact that you have thought about that professors offer for years... I don't think the prof would find it odd, but I do think that while it is okay to talk to her, she is somewhat limited because she cannot provide 'true' therapy because that is a dual relationship which is frowned on by the APA code of ethics, which all psychologists have to subscribe to (profs and doc students too).
Therapy does work, I have seen it from both sides of the coin, both as a client and as a therapist. There are all different kinds of therapy; some work on the past and others are more present oriented. For me this changes somewhat with what I feel the client needs- not everyone has to rehash their past in order to make their present work, but some people really truly do. You probably know best. I would call several therapists, have a list of questions prepared such as-
What is your orientation? (With this you are asking what is the basic theory they subscribe to, this will give you information about how they will conduct therapy- go ahead and ask them to explain it)
How do you see change occur?
What are your fees?
What is your experience/background in working with... (you get to fill in the blanks).
Therapists are basically trained as experts in human behavior and development (well, I guess that sort of depends on your training, but most programs are like that) so they should be able to help you with just about anything, from emotional/behavioral disorders to career to relationship/eating disoders... the list goes on. What I feel is the most critical element is the relationship you have w/ the therapist- do you like them? Do you feel they like you? Do they make you feel accepted, not judged? Do you trust them? That is why I suggest you call several, and whoever you seem to connect with on the phone might be a good person to start with. Hope that helps!

12-03-04, 01:29 AM
I think its odd that i have thought about the profs offer for years also. I guess that is why I asked. I guess I should clarilfy, after that year she stoped teaching and just did the private practice, to avoid such situations as not being able to help students such as myself. The prob is, I no longer live in that city, in fact I am 3 hrs away. HOwever, I really liked this therapist. I felt like we connected and that it was someone I could talk to. I think that is importnat. I just don't want to show up there one day and say, hey do u remember me? I ws in a class of your 5 years ago.......and so on. To me that seems really wierd. What do u think?

So what does this mean, I need to "re-hash" the past or what? I am lost. I just want to go in and have them ask me questions, rather then me ask. Does that make sense?

12-03-04, 09:10 AM

Everything you say makes sense to me, anyway.
I would definitely give this professor a call, she may not have any openings for new patients, but she may be able to refer you to someone...maybe even someone closer to you.

I just spent the last 2 days trying to connect my daughter to a pDoc and 13 offices were booked thru February! Sucks when you feel someone needs help NOW. Anyway found someone finally. But I was told over and over again, 'we are referring patients 2 hours North and South of our county because there are not enough pDocs locally:(

In my opinion you cannot get enough counseling. Counseling to me feels like something good you do for yourself.

Just do it;) FIrst you have to find someone with an opening, it may be easier to find counselors than psychiatrists. A good counselor will be able to refer you to a pDoc.

They are professionals; use to dealing with all types of personalities, people that are shy and they have to pull words out of, people who babble when they're nervous that they have to rein back in to stay on relevant 'issues' {like me:)}, etc.

You'll have to fill out paperwork, they'll ask about insurance and how you will pay. All in all once you enter their domain you won't have to do a thing except offer as much info as you are comfortable giving.

My unprofessional opinion is it's time for you to get counseling and that's why you are thinking about it --alot.
All this beating ourselves over how things might have been IF, we got help earlier, IF we took meds earlier, etc. I'm to the point of forgiving myself now, the RIGHT time is when we finally follow-thru and get help!

Come on casper, call around, get in to see someone and let us know how it goes:).

12-05-04, 11:24 PM
This all sounds fine and dandy, but until I get my own insurance I can't do it. I can't believe places are booking that far out. I totally hear u abot when u need it, u cant get it.

I have always thought counseling was a healthy thing, but as many of u know, its simply not viewed that way in the real world. I would think it would be a great opp for people to get things off their chests.

Whats the difference between a counselor and a psychiatrist? Is it just the degree or what? Are they cheaper then a real doc?

What do u expect at a first meeting? It takes me a while usually to get comfy with people. I don't know if I want to open up to just anyone. U know what I mean?

I feel weird even thinking about this, being younger and all. I am only 23, I feel like I should not have that many issues at my age.

thanks all

12-05-04, 11:53 PM
The difference between a counselor and a psychiatrist is that a psychiatrist is a medical doctor and can prescribe medication, while, generally, a counselor does not have that ability.

I'll give you an example of how much I would have to pay to see my psychiatrist and my therapist if I didn't have health insurance, just for comparison. My psychiatrist would cost me $85 per visit (which is not bad for a medical specialist), and my therapist would run me $115. The difference is that I see my psychiatrist once every 3 months for 15 min or so, but I see my therapist for an hour, twice a month. If you recieve both medication and psychotherapy from a psychiatrist, then I would probably expect it to be more expensive than if you saw two different people.

Your first visit with either a therapist or psychiatrist will involve taking a medical and psychological history. I'd expect this to take around an hour or so.

BTW, I'd be glad you're getting your ADD issues taken care of at 23, rather than later, like many of us. :) It's not easy to ask for help.