View Full Version : Does anyone here have a personality disorder?


Raye
11-22-12, 07:46 AM
I am wondering what it's like to live with this disorder. I don't know anyone who has it, and I'm curious to know more about it.

Plognark
11-23-12, 12:55 PM
Which one? There are a ton of different types and sub types.

Raye
11-24-12, 10:09 AM
I am aiming toward borderline personality

NonHyperHamster
11-26-12, 11:48 AM
Hey there Reye. When I was diagnosed with ADHD-PI I was also diagnosed with a personality disorder. Of course I've lost my papers thanks to my ADDish ways, and I cant remember which specific kind of crazy did the label me, but my recent experiences and a thread I started at another forum make me pretty sure it's BPD.

The thing that really freaks me out is my COMPLETE incapability to withstand even the thought of rejection or abandonment. Seriously, all I need is (what I consider) a weird look or tone of voice, and I go ape****. The other day my good friend didn't repeat my text immediately and in 5 to 10 minutes I was having a huge paranoid anxiety-attack. To put it short, I'm a really intense guy to be with. What really hurts with this weird symptom is how difficult it makes intimacy. I can charm you with a few words and a smile, but the minute things start to get serious, I get obsessed and urgent.

I've always known that this isn't a healthy level of intensity, so I keep it all in as much as possible. I know that my paranoia and despair make no sense, so I try my best not to pour it on others. I try to hide my GIGANTIC mood swings from my friends, family and the girls I date. Often I view myself way crazier than other see me, but it's hard to know what's real when you're living in constant pain.

There's an upside to this monkeybusiness though. The internal turmoil makes most other hardships feel like child play. When I was younger (roughly a year ago :D ) I used to overdose or even cut myself when the pain in my gut got too much for me to handle. Now that I've recovered (mostly) from my suicidal tendencies, I find relief in extreme physical exhaustion. Thai-boxing and martial arts have been my passion all my youth, and now I can really push myself to the limit. To me physical and mentalstruggle is therapeutic, so I can always go the extra mile when neseccary. This gives me a huge edge in life when it comes to combat-sports and achieving in general. It ain't worth the relationship-troubles though. Nothing is.

known_guy
11-26-12, 09:58 PM
I was at one point (such a diagnosis was short-lived) diagnosed with BPD. Independently from what goes on internally, emotionally, mentally, I found that living with the diagnosis was hell, in that mental health professionals treat BPD patients poorly. There is just this negative stigma and tendency toward(s) misunderstanding when it comes BPD, which is really unfortunate. The diagnosis in itself was detrimental to my recovery, in a sense. Whether or not I had/have BPD is a separate issue. The most difficult symptom I struggled with was the self-damaging impulsivity I exhibited. Impulse purchases, substance "abuse", promiscuity, physical self-injury, etc.

Dmitri
11-26-12, 10:02 PM
Yeah lol I got PP 1:2
Mine sucks because of the connotation... everyone who I've tried to tell thinks Im gonna shoot up the school or something lol so now I just kinda keep it secret.

Electra2
11-26-12, 11:46 PM
I haven't got one , at least not that I've heard of,
but my psychiatric nurse put me in a group with Avoidant
people to make me socialize with more people.
She said they were pretty much like me.
When I took an online test I scored most on,or very high on Avoident,and to a lesser degree Dependent.
I have the ADHD (inactive) diagnose, and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder,
and I used to have different Anxiety diagnosis and Depression
diagnoses in the past.

Raye
11-28-12, 07:25 PM
Non Hyper-

Of course I've lost my papers thanks to my ADDish ways, ///

Umm yeah i can so relate to that unfortunately. Thanks for the replies, I was just wondering what it was like to live with this disorder or know someone who has it.

Known guy,

I can imagine this is treated poorly, I'm so sorry you found living with it hell.
:grouphug:

Flory
11-28-12, 08:06 PM
hey raye :) , i don't have a pd, but i've experienced people with pd's and it wasnt pleasant have an aunt with some weird attention seeking pd, she used to od constantly and show up in a&e, had a surgery and deliberately picked all the stitching out, she drunk to the point that she now has liver issues and has had a lot of stomach removed etc has diabetes, gets herself arrested :/ was horrible..told my mum who had cancer that she was suffering with cancer and it was a lie, total eff up, had my mum who was ill herself trying to support her..i feel sorry for her but now noone wants anything to do with her because she is so destructive and nasty..literally most of the family refuse to engage with her

...im lucky i guess that for all of my maladpted ways im still fairly balanced..like im the same spaz today as i will be tomorrow, kinda cool about most things

MWalker
12-17-12, 03:30 AM
I have been diagnosed with schizoid personality disorder.
If you ever need an emotionally flat disinterested opinion
I'm your man, if I can sustain interest to form one.

I find with schizoids we're either real a**holes, or nice
guys with no personality. I tend to fall into the latter,
but I call it benign indifference.

Paradoxically I am married with children.
While I don't know if I can honestly say I love my family,
I accept that thier lives are just as important or
unimportant as my own, and I try to understand
what they need and give them that. I believe they feel
loved which I think is the main thing.

However, when I'm not around someone I don't
think about them, they kind of cease to exist. I don't really
find enjoyment in anything, but I do prefer some things
over others. For the most part I am not bothered by this,
though on rare occasions I will get a kind of frustrated
resentment that everything is so pointless. Never lasts long
though. Part of this is certainly related to my ADD
symptoms, the gaping chasm between my mind and the
outside world, my inability to stay focused for any length
of time etc.

Well that was probably more than I would normally
write anywhere in a month. As far as personality disorders
go, it's about the least interesting, but I will try to
remember to check back here if anyone has any questions.