View Full Version : i don't want to be bipolar

12-17-12, 07:16 AM
life as bipolar nutcase #3

I took tamazepam x ii and 0.5mg lorazepam x ii

why the h*** am I still awake

i can't have stimulant

i can't have my atypicals

daydream never ends

voice in head is loud and won't stop

f**k the world

f**k bipolar disorder

i hate this

i hate everything

12-17-12, 07:26 AM
Alpha, I'm getting evaluated for bipolar disorder tomorrow and I can so relate. I don't want to be bipolar. I don't have anything constructive to say but here's lots of hugs. :grouphug:

12-17-12, 08:58 AM
:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

12-17-12, 03:50 PM
*hands you a drink* Yep, f**k the world, that'll never go away, but neither will the disorder.

I've dealt with the daydreaming by creating personas that get stuff done individually.

Luna: Daily chores, takes over when I'm stressed at night and just want cuddles

LM: Successful writer with her own business. Takes no **** from nobody but stays professional about it. Doesn't want to deal with distractions and has door to door people dealt with by her security.

Joy: Security. Psycho coco puff. Does not speak, but screams inwardly and outwardly.

Daith: Sex. Just... sex.

James: mood control.

It's like a huge roleplay. Sounds stupid out loud but it works miracles. It also helps with the sounds in my head telling me I suck because they have been replaced with new sounds.

Negative Voice: You suck Sarah. You'll never amount to anything. You're fat, ugly, and no one loves you.

Luna: Sa-chan is so squishy! I lerves her! =^-^=

LM: Ha! I'm 25, own my own house, have a successful writing career which includes the FamiKamen Rider series with THE Justin Jewwario Carmical, am in a strong marriage people only DREAM of, and I volunteer on the side... all in one day. Now if you'll excuse me I don't have time right now to talk. You'll have to schedule an appointment which I have none available. Security, please escort this failure out of my office.

Joy: I will protect you from that voice and KIIIIILLLLL it from the cords outward. Crawl back inside. You don't want to see this.

Daith: I can't make the mental pain go away, but I can make you forget it for a few hours with a simple touch. It's alright. I've got you. Don't be scared. I'm not going anywhere.

James: **** off dude. I'm fat so I can bounce your *** out. I ain't ugly, I'm boyishly good looking for someone who can whoop you at Tekken. Which reminds me I left my game on pause. I'd invite you do play but... I don't want to embarrass you.

Pretty soon, the negative voices go away.

12-17-12, 04:23 PM

12-18-12, 09:17 AM
I just told a close friend I am bipolar and he said I should just snap out of it.

12-18-12, 09:18 AM
I just told a close friend I am bipolar and he said I should just snap out of it.

Moron. I'm annoyed on your behalf. :mad:

12-18-12, 09:31 AM
I just told a close friend I am bipolar and he said I should just snap out of it.
Okay *snaps his neck*

12-18-12, 02:50 PM
Moron. I'm annoyed on your behalf. :mad:

Okay *snaps his neck*

It took me a lot courage to put myself out there and now I feel silly.

Thanks guys people are so ignorant. Because they are fine we should be too.
All we have to do is change out mindset we can be fine aswell. Theirs stigma attached that we just lazy or stubborn. Now I'm really annoyed.