View Full Version : Healing And Coping


Bluerose
02-03-13, 03:26 PM
I’m just an ordinary member once again.

Being a moderator on here was an amazing experience but also a little overwhelming at times.

I feel for all you moderators and admire you all for your hard work on here to make everyone feel safe while posting.

This forum has helped me so very much over the last few years. You’ll never know how much.

I wondered if we could write here about healing and coping regardless of what disorder we are dealing with.

Can you post something that you feel might help others cope better with everyday life?

:thankyou:

Unmanagable
02-03-13, 04:51 PM
This gentleman and his teachings have done more for my peace of mind than anything else I've ever tried.

The bolded part was done by me because a lot of folks immediately dismiss anything with terminology like "raise your vibration", tossing it aside as new age crap, etc., without looking any deeper.

Based on my personal experiences, it is so worth a deeper look.



Raising Your Vibration
by: Jim Donovan

Much of what we are experiencing on the planet now has to do with a push towards exponential human evolution.

Though your condition has always been one of consistent change, the time has come for that change to happen more rapidly.

As we all know, our reactions to change are often accompanied by resistance.

This resistance is your natural defense mechanism designed to keep you safe.

The paradox is that to evolve involves taking risks, which inherently feels unsafe.

The main work each of us has to do at this point in time directly involves confronting those aspects of life that need to change and then to actively and briskly change them.

Raising your vibration is another way of saying, “let go of your fear”.

On a practical level, there are some key things you may consider doing that will EASE the discomfort of your fears as they arise.

1. CONNECT with others who are choosing to do their inner work. Act as sounding boards for each other. Listen to and witness each other. Find ways to physically meet together in a joyful way. These connections are an invaluable way of both offering and getting the crucial support each of you may desire.

2. BE IN NATURE. Go for walks outdoors, get your feet in the grass, breathe sunlight into your heart.

3. TALK with the divine. Whatever word you choose, whether it is the Universe, Great Spirit, God, higher self etc. is inconsequential. Now is the time to open, reopen or continue your connection with that which is beyond your daily drama and life roles. Consider talking/praying as if you are speaking to an old friend (very old indeed!). Ask questions, ask for help, and offer gratitude.

4. LISTEN. Quiet your mind through any technique you know; deep breathing, meditation, yoga, chant, drumming. Find ways, even if it is only for short periods per day to listen without expectations.

5. ACT on intuitive information. Once per day, consider making a conscious choice to “go with your gut” and take notice if and how your life begins to shift.

6. IT IS TEMPORARY.: Though there may be times when you feel utterly alone and flailing, remember that all discomfort is temporary AND that you are stronger than it.

PS: Remember to look back down the mountain once in a while to see just how far you’ve come.


(This is the website I got this from: http://www.smore.com/wb7p )

SquarePeg
02-03-13, 06:11 PM
I think it is our duty and purpose as human beings to spiritually evolve and not stay inert or stagnant. We often remain in once place because of fear, whether we are in a good or bad place, the familiarity of it feels somewhat reassuring so we stay.

We chose our paths in life but to move forward mean that we have to evaluate our path and decide whether it´s the right path, if not we need to chose another path. This can be difficult. It can involve making scary changes, moving into the unknown, upsetting people we love and care about.

Moving forward doesn´t necessarily mean becoming more successful or doing better. For those with adhd and other conditions, it can mean learning more about ourselves and trying out new approaches. It means connecting with others, sharing and trying to improve the world for ourselves and others. It´s a continual quest.

All of us here are moving forward spiritually. We listen to one another, we support one another, we share successes and failures, we are looking for ways to change our paths and to help others on their own road. We are trying to conquer our fears. We are striving to learn as much as we can about our conditions and pass on this knowledge to others, so that their struggles and burdens will be eased, if only a little.

So even if you feel you haven´t made any progress at all and feel stuck, this is not the case, by participating in this forum and sharing you have proved that you are evolving.

We should all be proud of ourselves and this forum, it´s truly a great place.

Bluerose
02-04-13, 02:15 PM
This gentleman and his teachings have done more for my peace of mind than anything else I've ever tried.

The bolded part was done by me because a lot of folks immediately dismiss anything with terminology like "raise your vibration", tossing it aside as new age crap, etc., without looking any deeper.

Based on my personal experiences, it is so worth a deeper look.



(This is the website I got this from: http://www.smore.com/wb7p )



Thanks for the link.

I’m really into this raising your vibration stuff because I truly believe what goes around comes around and that like attracts like. Therefore we must be the changes we want to see in other people - and the world. :)

Bluerose
02-04-13, 02:27 PM
I think it is our duty and purpose as human beings to spiritually evolve and not stay inert or stagnant. We often remain in once place because of fear, whether we are in a good or bad place, the familiarity of it feels somewhat reassuring so we stay.

We chose our paths in life but to move forward mean that we have to evaluate our path and decide whether it´s the right path, if not we need to chose another path. This can be difficult. It can involve making scary changes, moving into the unknown, upsetting people we love and care about.

Moving forward doesn´t necessarily mean becoming more successful or doing better. For those with adhd and other conditions, it can mean learning more about ourselves and trying out new approaches. It means connecting with others, sharing and trying to improve the world for ourselves and others. It´s a continual quest.

All of us here are moving forward spiritually. We listen to one another, we support one another, we share successes and failures, we are looking for ways to change our paths and to help others on their own road. We are trying to conquer our fears. We are striving to learn as much as we can about our conditions and pass on this knowledge to others, so that their struggles and burdens will be eased, if only a little.

So even if you feel you haven´t made any progress at all and feel stuck, this is not the case, by participating in this forum and sharing you have proved that you are evolving.

We should all be proud of ourselves and this forum, it´s truly a great place.



SquarePeg,

Well said. :)

I agree, whether we realise it or not, I believe we are all on a journey of personal and spiritual development. Each of us have a path to follow and that path includes pain and suffering. Thankfully the more we grow personally and spiritually the less we suffer. We often imagine that nothing changes but change is happening all the time even when we are unaware of it.

peripatetic
02-05-13, 12:42 AM
something that i found remarkable in efficacy and impact has been keeping at least one person, someone you really trust, in person or not, but since i'm posting here on the forum and find it applicable to my circumstances i'll go with saying "a friend".

no matter how hard **** hits the fan, and perhaps it's just me and a few i know really well, but for some there's a tendency to isolate...for various reasons...and it's especially hard during some of those times to not just extend self, but to let others' extensions of self in whatever capacity "reach" through the mess. historically i've been prone to just let people fade....especially those who get upset or hurt at my not being able to deal...i've just "handled" that when i'm back in action, so to speak, and see they've gone from inquiry to concern to hurt to anger and told me off and my response has always been, like, have a nice life because if you're not going to appreciate that i simply couldn't handle *anything* and so forth, best to nip it in the bud.

i'll admit though that i've seldom really been able to or been able to see the effort and respond at all and more recently i'm glad i've found the capacity and made the concerted effort to maintain at least a few. sure, for the most part i've been able to rekindle at least a handful of relatinoships even after some amount of total absence...but it's cost me far more than i've kept and only at this point can i see that maybe my reaction of "lif they're not still there ultimately, then they never really were" is shortsighted and more a "sour grapes" response than anything else.

while i still think that i'm never going to be great at constant reciprocity, i can say that there are people, even at horrible times, who ARE worth keeping on and who DO mean it when they say they want to take whatever i can give. having even just one person who expects nothing but will give whatever s/he can...is something i've come to realize is inestimable in impact. it's no exaggeration to say that having that link to someone outside your own head, someone who actively wants to understand and support, for however long, in whatever circumstance, can make all the difference in feeling like you can come back and that you're connected/grounded to someone somewhere. i've been kept on against all odds, by virtue of trust and hope that we don't live unwitnessed lives and i know how much it meant to me to be that person kept on, but only recently have i seen how much it can mean to have another be that person in my life.

who that person is.....who's kept on and who's not.....some choices are better than others...and we choose people....there's always a reason why this person and not that one....and the inclination to keep on or not....overall i've chosen wisely, but not perfectly. it's a work in progress though, you konw? if i could "do over", sure, maybe there'd be a slightly different line up....maybe i wish i had opted to keep this person on and keeping this other one on didn't end as well. and maybe, hopefully, if opportunity arises again, i'll be able to keep that in mind. it's hard to say as keeping folks on is a relatively recent thingl....but i do see some amount of "expansion"....once there was only one....more recently there were a whole handful. and, of course, there are those who've more/less demonstratively severed/faded, but regardless of how life transpires, i'll be eternally grateful to a couple of people who knew they couldn't "fix" me, but actively, even forcefully at times, opted to be present. having that support network, even if at times it felt cumbersome and i felt inadequate and so forth, didn't effect "similitude", but did give me a sense of not being one of those trees falling unwitnessed and unknown and, at the end of the day, was the single greatest factor in my being able to return to the forums and not feel like an unknown alien.

i guess my point here, and why i'm posting, is that there are some of us who have found it overwhelming and an impossible task to let others choose to witness our worst moments and/or if they really knew what was in store they'd run for the hills and so we're "protecting" them, or protecting ourselves from taking on too much...from being relied upon/depended upon....and that's the sort of person i'm posting this for. people who have significant trouble letting people invest in us when we can't fathom investing in ourselves....with few exceptions, letting that happen has been more important than i'd've ever imagined.

all that said selection is key and what would be huge for a person varies...but when it's the right person(s) knowing you aren't completely isolated is only possible if you make the choice to keep someone on and can be extremely rewarding.

Bluerose
02-05-13, 01:44 PM
Well said.

I think we all communicate quite well when we are feeling 'fine' but not so well when we are not, and the people who stick around and are willing to listen and offer help in those times are the people we come to know as 'friend'. And yes some people just don't get the difference. Everyone has their 'bad' days and, just like a naughty child, that's when they need our love and understanding the most. :)


The Friend Who Just Stands By
By B.Y. Williams

When trouble comes your soul to try,
You love the friend who just “stands by.”
Perhaps there’s nothing s/he can do—
The thing is strictly up to you;
For there are troubles all your own,
And paths the soul must tread alone;
Times when love cannot smooth the road
Nor friendship lift the heavy load,
But just to know you have a friend
Who will stand by until the end,
Whose sympathy through all endures,
Whose warm handclasp is always yours—
It helps, someway, to pull you through,
Although there’s nothing s/he can do.
And so with fervent heart you cry,
“God bless the friend who just ’stands by’!”

saturday
02-05-13, 02:17 PM
With out wanting to get too religious or anything, or rather give details about my religion, the one thing I value most about this institution that I subscribe to is the promotion of serving others. I heal when I've helped someone else heal, or maybe its just witnessing another person heal or seeing them make peace with their demons in life, IDK. But, stepping outside of my mind and internal term oil, though given there are times I can't escape, but when I can step out of my issues and help another walk through theirs, well I guess it seems like my issues dissapear too.