View Full Version : Was I misdiagnosed?


dasikins
02-14-13, 03:23 PM
I was just diagnosed for ADHD after going in for what I thought was for Depression.

I started Depression meds in 2008 because I felt very up and down and when my mom suddenly died I was a wreck. They were incredibly helpful in keeping the depression away. I got off Effexor in 2011 and noticed I could not control my crying. I would cry about everything-work, home, running, you name it.

I got on Pristiq about a year ago. Was great for 2 months and then stopped.
All the ADs I have tried have made me very flat. No motivation, apathetic, and just plain flat.

BEFORE my ADs, I was up and then down. I remember thinking once and have never forgot-wow I am so grateful my highs are so high, no one normal feels like this. The down side was of course the cutting, the depression. Then again I come from a very rocky past so I didn't think I was.

I don't fall into the manic category, but hypomanic maybe? I use to do a ton of coke when I was young and my happiness was NOTHING like that or euphoric in nature.

Every psy says no, but I miss feeling stuff. I miss empathy and happiness and even the sadness (ok not really but...)

Thought you guys might have some more insight rather than a questionnaire, which seems to always state 'you maybe.'

dvdnvwls
02-14-13, 03:28 PM
Sorry - more insight into what?

Oh, I see, I should have remembered the title "Was I misdiagnosed?"

I have no idea. Do you really think you were?

dasikins
02-14-13, 04:24 PM
Oh idk-I think there is a good chance and maybe that's why I respond the way I do to the stims or ADs.

keliza
02-14-13, 09:23 PM
Antidepressants have a pretty strong tendency to make people with bipolar disorder switch into mania, about 50% of the time. The fact that you have been on them for so long and never experienced a manic switch indicates that it's probably not bipolar disorder.

Of course it's only half and half, so it doesn't mean definitively that you don't have it, but if you've done cocaine in the past AND taken antidepressants and NONE of those things triggered a long-lasting manic episode? Did you say that you take stimulants for ADHD and it doesn't trigger mania either? That makes me highly doubt it's bipolar disorder. I would think that at least one of those substances would have triggered a manic episode at some point if it were. I've had manic episodes triggered by antidepressants, stimulants, caffeine, even simply not getting enough sleep during a particularly rough period of time.

What you said about your history is that you were up and down before, and then your mother died and you lost it from there. First, I'm really sorry to hear about your mom. Second, I don't mean to pry, but what was your grieving process like? You said the antidepressant helped keep away your depression after that, but when you went off it 3 years later, you couldn't stop crying. Do you feel like the antidepressant might have stunted your ability to fully grieve your mother's death, since it gave you such severe blunt affect? (Blunt affect is the name for what you described, the utter lack of feeling while on antidepressants.)

I'm not saying that there isn't a chemical component to this, because there very well could be. You had issues with depression long before your mother's death... although you also said you had a rough childhood, as evident by your dabbling in cocaine. But the fact that it got so much worse after your mom's death, and that you haven't really had an extended period of time off medication since then... that has me wondering what kind of a role repressed, "stuck" grief might have to do with this.

Have you spoken to a therapist at all, or just a psychiatrist?

dasikins
02-14-13, 10:27 PM
Antidepressants have a pretty strong tendency to make people with bipolar disorder switch into mania, about 50% of the time. The fact that you have been on them for so long and never experienced a manic switch indicates that it's probably not bipolar disorder.

Of course it's only half and half, so it doesn't mean definitively that you don't have it, but if you've done cocaine in the past AND taken antidepressants and NONE of those things triggered a long-lasting manic episode? Did you say that you take stimulants for ADHD and it doesn't trigger mania either? That makes me highly doubt it's bipolar disorder. I would think that at least one of those substances would have triggered a manic episode at some point if it were. I've had manic episodes triggered by antidepressants, stimulants, caffeine, even simply not getting enough sleep during a particularly rough period of time.

What you said about your history is that you were up and down before, and then your mother died and you lost it from there. First, I'm really sorry to hear about your mom. Second, I don't mean to pry, but what was your grieving process like? You said the antidepressant helped keep away your depression after that, but when you went off it 3 years later, you couldn't stop crying. Do you feel like the antidepressant might have stunted your ability to fully grieve your mother's death, since it gave you such severe blunt affect? (Blunt affect is the name for what you described, the utter lack of feeling while on antidepressants.)

I'm not saying that there isn't a chemical component to this, because there very well could be. You had issues with depression long before your mother's death... although you also said you had a rough childhood, as evident by your dabbling in cocaine. But the fact that it got so much worse after your mom's death, and that you haven't really had an extended period of time off medication since then... that has me wondering what kind of a role repressed, "stuck" grief might have to do with this.

Have you spoken to a therapist at all, or just a psychiatrist?

Ah, thanks Keliza-that was super helpful! I will stop worrying about it. Once I started on these stims, I didn't feel any reprieve, which was shocking. I started to analyze everything I guess.

Definitely no manic episodes on my previous drug usage, which was a lot back in the days. No mania really ever, but definite highs and lows!

I have always struggled with depression. I did seek psychotherapy help when I was 24 (I'm 31 now) for awhile. She had me try some meds, Zoloft I think, but I was very 'anti meds' at that point. Then did some more psycho therapy through the years until finally I started meds for real after my mom's passing. Cymbalta made me suicidal or maybe it was the situation-who knows, then Cym and Well, and finally Effexor.

Yah, that brings up a great point-about the grieving process. Although, the Effexor by no means made me apathetic like the Pristiq has. I will ask about that one next week.

Thanks so very much for your helpful insight!

keliza
02-15-13, 02:31 AM
Ah, thanks Keliza-that was super helpful! I will stop worrying about it. Once I started on these stims, I didn't feel any reprieve, which was shocking. I started to analyze everything I guess.

Definitely no manic episodes on my previous drug usage, which was a lot back in the days. No mania really ever, but definite highs and lows!

I have always struggled with depression. I did seek psychotherapy help when I was 24 (I'm 31 now) for awhile. She had me try some meds, Zoloft I think, but I was very 'anti meds' at that point. Then did some more psycho therapy through the years until finally I started meds for real after my mom's passing. Cymbalta made me suicidal or maybe it was the situation-who knows, then Cym and Well, and finally Effexor.

Yah, that brings up a great point-about the grieving process. Although, the Effexor by no means made me apathetic like the Pristiq has. I will ask about that one next week.

Thanks so very much for your helpful insight!

You're welcome! I hope you are able to find a medication that helps alleviate the depression without making you feel like an apathetic zombie. That is a terrible feeling to have, it's almost as bad as the being depressed itself, sometimes worse. It's not either-or, you don't have to either be profoundly depressed OR have completely blunted affect.

Fortunately there is a world of medications out there that you have only dipped your toes into, and there may be an alternate to SSRI/SNRI antidepressants that works better for your depression. There are alternative antidepressants like Remeron, or tricyclic antidepressants, an older class that sometimes works better when SSRI/SNRI drugs do not. Also, Lamictal (an anti-epileptic/mood stabilizer) is also sometimes used with great efficacy for treatment-refractory unipolar depression. Sometimes even Lithium will be used for severe, unremitting depression that has not responded to antidepressants or other lesser medications.

Atypical antipsychotics have a habit of turning people into zombies... it's because the illnesses typically treated with those meds (bipolar, schizophrenia, and schizoaffective disorders) are so severe that sometimes blunting is the best you can do, versus all-out psychosis. But sometimes people find that better than crippling depression and suicidal feelings. But not all medications do that. Hopefully with more playing around you can find one that has more tolerable (read: fewer) side effects.

dasikins
02-15-13, 11:15 AM
You're welcome! I hope you are able to find a medication that helps alleviate the depression without making you feel like an apathetic zombie. That is a terrible feeling to have, it's almost as bad as the being depressed itself, sometimes worse. It's not either-or, you don't have to either be profoundly depressed OR have completely blunted affect.



Ha-exactly! This is the first time I have had this blunted effect. Maybe it's because my life is drama/stress free. I use to pray that I would feel nothing, because as you mentioned, sometimes apathy outweighs the lows. Ooops-got what I wanted lol.

I have read a LOT into alternative therapies like you mentioned. Between that that new meds coming out hopefully there will be some relief for all of us.

Thanks again!