View Full Version : Royally screwed myself (desperately need help)


ILikeHats
04-12-13, 03:47 PM
So I think I royally screwed myself over. I've been in swim and water polo for more than 3 years now (it's my senior year). And I've had a really bad run. I've been terrible for the past three years I've been in it, the head coach HATES me with a passion and has kicked me off and put me back on at least 3 times. All I do is screw around and talk all the time. This year, I didn't do water polo because I missed hell week and my coach wouldn't let me do it so all I could do it swimming. Needless to say, I've had problems over they year but I've gotten better. Recently, during swim season I've really started getting serious and paying attention. I've been getting really good swim times and everything's been going good. But old habits die hard, yesterday I had a fieldtrip to go whale watching (I'm in the Gray Whale foundation) and everything was fine until the end. When we got back to the school and my teacher was doing a head count. I thought it would be freaking hilarious to hide behind the seat (I was in the back of the bus) and make him screw up his head count. I did it like 3 times until I finally sat up. He was ******. I lied and told him that I was looking for my phone but he didn't believe me. He told my coach that I was messing around (the head count issue) and lolligagging on my way to practice (which THAT is bs, I walked straight there), and so my coach told my dad that we was fed up and is telling me to join 0 period P.E. if I need the credits, or quit. I have to talk to him during lunch. Swim season is over in two weeks and me and all the other seniors already planned on quitting. So hopefully, I can convince him to let me stay for two weeks until I quit. But I really screwed up :(. I've been working SOOO hard because my grandpa was going to come from maryland (who I only see once a year) to watch my last swim meet since he hasn't seen one but since I'm probably going to get kicked off, my dad is making him cancel the trip. I feel like crying and doing TERRIBLE things to myself because I've been so terrible lately. I've been lying CONSTANTLY to my parents and everyone around me and I've been getting really bad grades that I'm desperately trying to bring up and everything has gone (pardon my french) to ****. I'm seriously breaking under the pressure and I'm falling apart. I got into a few UC's as well and it might go all down the drain if I don't bring up my grades. I just CANNOT bring myself to do my homework, everytime I get home, I just sit around and watch tv. EVEN WHEN I HAVE NO TV, NO GAMES, NOTHING, my brain TRIES to find something OTHER than doing my homework, it's MISSION in life is to stop me from doing my homework :(. I'm thinking of doing drastic things just to stop all the pain I bring everyone. I don't know what to do and I have to see my coach in about 30 minutes. :( Please help me someone. >_< :(

midnightstar
04-12-13, 04:10 PM
Are you on medication for ADD? I practically had to self-diagnose myself because I always struggled with lack of concentration (I still do), trust me you need to get help now so you don't end up struggling with ADD in adulthood as well :grouphug:

ILikeHats
04-12-13, 04:51 PM
Are you on medication for ADD? I practically had to self-diagnose myself because I always struggled with lack of concentration (I still do), trust me you need to get help now so you don't end up struggling with ADD in adulthood as well :grouphug:

Yeh, I'm on straterra 60mg for my adhd but I don't think it's helping a all. :(

midnightstar
04-12-13, 05:26 PM
Yeh, I'm on straterra 60mg for my adhd but I don't think it's helping a all. :(

Maybe tell the doctor it's not helping any more? :grouphug:

dvdnvwls
04-12-13, 05:55 PM
I think you really should go back to the doctor (as in, dial the phone right now) and say how bad things are going in your life. Maybe a change to your medication, or a change in your strategy, or both, would help.

SquarePeg
04-12-13, 06:31 PM
Sorry to hear you are struggling so much. You need to go back to your doc and tell him the meds arenīt working. Do you parents understand ADHD? can you talk to them? I think you need to share with a close family member how you are feeling. :grouphug:

BellaVita
04-12-13, 07:44 PM
:grouphug:
So sorry that you're going through so much. You're at the right place, though, as I'm sure many of us can relate. I know I can.
I agree with the others about talking to your doctor about your medication situation. Also talking to your parents.
Also, do you have any siblings? Any friends? Maybe you could talk to them. (It's totally up to you.)

We've all been through places in our life where we aren't too happy about ourselves. I wouldn't beat yourself up so much about it. Honestly.
You seem like a smart individual, your life has a purpose and it can take time(hard for us impatient ADHDers, eh?) to figure that out.

BTW - that's awesome about the gray whale foundation thing. (that you take part in it.) Whales rock. :) :cool:

ILikeHats
04-12-13, 08:25 PM
I'll talk to my parents about going to the doctor. Thanks guys. >_<

BellaVita
04-12-13, 08:29 PM
I'll talk to my parents about going to the doctor. Thanks guys. >_<

That's good.
Hope all goes well. Hang in there!!
:)

ginniebean
04-12-13, 09:06 PM
Awwww I feel for you. That's an awful lot of stress. Were you able to talk the coach into letting you stay? I say kicking you out of the swim class was wrong!

ILikeHats
04-13-13, 12:46 AM
Awwww I feel for you. That's an awful lot of stress. Were you able to talk the coach into letting you stay? I say kicking you out of the swim class was wrong!

Nope :/ He kicked me out an there's nothing I can do. Swim season is over in 2 weeks anyways and it's my senior year.

ginniebean
04-13-13, 03:49 AM
Nope :/ He kicked me out an there's nothing I can do. Swim season is over in 2 weeks anyways and it's my senior year.

I'm so sorry you had to go thru that, it's terribly unfair can you appeal to someone higher up? The principal? He's not teaching anything, he's retaliating.

He needs to grow up.

:grouphug:

someothertime
04-13-13, 06:25 AM
Great to know your aware of what's going on!

The fooling around stuff will get better with better treatment + practice but you'll always get those inklings ;)

Don't stress about everything at once....take a deep breath.....be good to yourself and chug along bit by bit where it most needed.

Regarding homework.....do it outside if the house...pack your lunch and go to a library or park for 1-2 hours and just take your study stuff.

ILikeHats
04-15-13, 01:53 AM
I'm so sorry you had to go thru that, it's terribly unfair can you appeal to someone higher up? The principal? He's not teaching anything, he's retaliating.

He needs to grow up.

:grouphug:

As much as I wish there was a way to retaliate it, my coach has worked there since the 70's, so it's his word against mine. :c But beliee me, my parents have fought HARD in the past against him, but it just isn't worth it now. :/

Ninjas
04-15-13, 07:59 AM
Welll It's probably too late but...

-Talk to your parents. They'll probably find you some help...
-Talk to your coach. Ask him why you were kicked (as obvious as it may seem... Just make him say it.)
-Then, ask HIM for advice. (If people want to criticize you, they must have a solution, no?) Telling him that 'you can't help it' isn't going to work, to be honest...
-Talk to the school nurse. If you guys have one.