View Full Version : OLD" IS WHEN.....


Garry
02-07-05, 05:13 PM
"OLD" IS WHEN..... Your sweetie says, "Let's go upstairs and make love," and you answer, "Honey, I can't do both!"



"OLD" IS WHEN..... Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot.



"OLD" IS WHEN..... A sexy babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door.



"OLD" IS WHEN..... Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.



"OLD" IS WHEN..... You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.



"OLD" IS WHEN..... You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police.



"OLD" IS WHEN..... "Getting a little action" means I don't need to take any fiber today.



"OLD" IS WHEN..... "Getting lucky" means you find your car in the parking lot.



"OLD" IS WHEN..... An "all nighter" means not getting up to pee.

fasttalkingmom
02-07-05, 07:26 PM
You know I HAD to look at this one.......

Very good........ :D

Spacey Cat
02-07-05, 09:11 PM
OLD is when you hear the Musak version of your favorite song in the elevator.

OLD is if, on your last birthday, the cost of candles exceeded the cost of your birthday cake

OLD is when "stroke" refers to a medical condition, instead of your golf game

OLD is when most of your sentences begin with "when I was your age..."

OLD is when watching paint dry holds a certain fascination

OLD is when your bifocals need bifocals

OLD is when your back goes out more than you do

OLD is when you can relate to most of these!

casper
02-07-05, 09:18 PM
OLD is when u can't remember what u did today!

auntchris
02-07-05, 09:24 PM
OLD is when you can't remember what you ate for breakfast.

Digitl
02-07-05, 10:57 PM
your old when kids call you Ma'am....

auntchris
02-07-05, 11:02 PM
yes ma'am

Old is when you listen to music with your niece and dont understand the words .

free2bme
02-08-05, 01:37 AM
OLD IS WALKING INTO A DOCTOR APPOINTMENT AND SEEING THAT HE'S YOUNGER THAN YOU ARE.....

You have no idea how difficult it was not to ask this child for proof of his training!

RhapsodyInBlue
02-08-05, 01:53 AM
When I look at Andrei first thing in the morning:eek: :eek: :eek: !!!!!!!!! :p

Ancient Music
02-08-05, 02:02 AM
Right my Beautiful Wildcat,

A spanking is definitely in order for the very near future!!!!:mad: ;)


When I look at Andrei first thing in the morning :eek: !!!!!!!!! :p
P.S. I have never yet heard you complain about "old age " creeping up on
you! :p

All my love and kisses,

Andrei

Draga
02-08-05, 10:12 AM
Rotflmmfao!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

exeter
02-08-05, 02:53 PM
OLD is when you hear the Musak version of your favorite song in the elevator.

Here's a related one:

OLD is when the music that was considered hard rock when you were a kid shows up on the easy listening station.

No joke, this happened to me. I think it was an Alice Cooper song.

fasttalkingmom
02-08-05, 06:59 PM
Here's a related one:

OLD is when the music that was considered hard rock when you were a kid shows up on the easy listening station.

No joke, this happened to me. I think it was an Alice Cooper song.

Wow you are old..... :D

exeter
02-08-05, 08:13 PM
Wow you are old..... :D
Hahaha, very funny. :D

casper
02-09-05, 12:14 AM
Old is when u can't remember what u were going to type!

Decrovid
03-14-05, 09:34 PM
You Know your old when,
the bags under your eyes flap around under you suns glasses when your riding your Harley.
Of course it wasnt as funny when it was happening...

Andi
03-14-05, 10:30 PM
Old is when you have to grab your teeth out of the glass they're soaking in just so you can nibble on your significant other...

auntchris
03-18-05, 02:44 PM
Old is when ....you say When I was Growning up

crazymama05
03-18-05, 09:22 PM
I just want to say thank you to all of you for making me feel 38 years young.....although i could do without the gut that wont go away.

aneededchange
03-18-05, 09:55 PM
Old is when you have more joints that hurt than joints that don't.


Old is when you complain about how loud the music "kids" these days play.

FightingBoredom
03-19-05, 05:29 PM
Old is when you can't find your colostomy bag buried within the rolls of your sagging stretched out skin.

Sugarbossbabe
03-20-05, 05:28 PM
Old is when you hear yourself talk and think 'oh my god I sound like my mother'

broK
03-21-05, 04:46 PM
Old is when you have to grab your teeth out of the glass they're soaking in just so you can nibble on your significant other...now i feel like someones been watching...:eek: :o

old is when-1'st thing in the morning you make noises like your father did
old is when you remember your telephone exchange had a word ('stead of 3 numbers)
old is when what doesnt hurt doesnt work
:(

old is when...oh...i forget...

crazymama05
03-21-05, 05:14 PM
Old is when you bend over or try to get up out of a chair and you make those groaning noises like your grandpa.

witsend
03-21-05, 05:24 PM
Old is when you go to the store for one thing & gas cost more than the item did!

Sugarbossbabe
03-21-05, 05:55 PM
Old is...how would I know,I am only 35.:p

witsend
03-22-05, 01:45 AM
I only know about the store thin cuz hubby's gma lives next door & goes to the market abot 10x a day!!!

minn306
03-22-05, 03:13 PM
We were watching a movie the other night on tv, when my 10 yr old daughter asked what a "drive in" movie theatre was(they were showing one on the movie). OMG...........I did not realize that those were not around anymore. THAT was my dose of "being old"

witsend
03-22-05, 03:20 PM
oh man!! we still have 2(?) in san diego. but we never go. One has telephone lines passing through the screen & the other is in a not too good 'hood( if you know what I mean)

minn306
03-22-05, 03:35 PM
oh man!! we still have 2(?) in san diego. but we never go. One has telephone lines passing through the screen & the other is in a not too good 'hood( if you know what I mean)
I grew up in Southern Calif & I remember having several drive in movie theaters around. I just never thought about if they were still around or not, until my daughter asked me what they were

witsend
03-22-05, 04:21 PM
Are there any in Minn? I think i'll have to take him just for the expierience of it... pj's in the ca. I have wagon so he could sit in the back& watch the movie that way too.

minn306
03-22-05, 04:28 PM
My husband, who has lived here his whole life, said that they used to have them everywhere...............but I certainly do not see any around NOW!!!

I remember piling in the back of a truck(when that was still legal to do) with several of my friends to go to the drive in movie.............aaahhh those were the days!!

witsend
03-22-05, 04:32 PM
oh I know. When i was in TX for the 1st time i saw that everywhere!!! it was so strange. no motorcycle helmets, ppl in the back of trucks...did you know the age for carseats is only mandatory untill age 2!!??