View Full Version : Pursuing Legal Counsel/Advocacy

Blanched Dubois
05-10-13, 05:49 PM
Pursuant to;

18 yr old only son's diagnosed disabilities and the many Dr's, psychologists, VA, schools from kindergarten to 12th grade ( he's trying to finish but with great duress and until now punishment by authorities ) who blew us off and got away with it only due to our misdiagnosed, mismanaged and abusive care or the lack thereof leading to severe losses before and after Vet husband dies from service related death on 100% VA disability claim and SSI. Our child's plight and our own illness' and lack of education and all of us 'high functioning' despite symptoms and final diagnoses corroborating facts, medical history, got us the royal run around by those who didn't care.

First on list, as the mother of a disabled child since birth and filed as 'Helpless Child' with the VA ( no family but myself in his life since 2008 ) who has consistently been told he'd 'grow out of it' ( symptoms were not given proper attention or care possibly due to myself or my husband being unable to help due to our own disabilities ) and after years of insult upon injury - i filed disability for son last year and was 'denied' due to their answer 'he isn't eligible to receive disability because he's receiving a death benefit that is over at 18, unless he is still in school ( which he is ) and only then can he apply.

The lawyer I found recently who's specialties are real estate, mortgage and elder law and Veteran Admin rights/benefits is handling a case for me now. Upon research I believe that my son's and my current demise is due to lack of care for the disabled who are summarily dismissed as 'not worth the time or money' unless pushed by an expensive lawyer or an advocate for the disabled.

Wondering if anyone else has experienced any of this at all?

My son's case is my priority. His medical history will prove he's had a GI problem since his 'difficult birth' that also should have been sued for malpractice but since only my disabled husband was in attendance with me through the entire labor and delivery and our disabilities in general being 'forgotten' i was shot up with so much demerol from midnight until 4am due to only 'one anaestesiologist available to administer an epidural and he was tending to a code blue' my son was born blue, needed to be revived and I burst every blood vessel in my face and eyes and we were only grateful no one died and son appeared fine. Again, no advocacy and our ignorance or lack of ability to deal with it .....all no excuse not to fight now for some rights.

I'm posting this because it's really what has always been my greatest fight falling on deaf ears. I begged the schools to help - was not offered an EOC or IEP until my husband was dying and I was so overwhelmed by untreated ADD/PTSD, high functioning ( apparently ) I was already out of my mind trying to find Dr to treat son's GI issues never getting any Dr's or therapists to assess and tie together son's physical issues with his adhd/aspergers because - again - we're not the professionals and had no idea of our own disabilities until we were too far gone to seek legal counsel.

My death ( 3 minutes ) and 11th hour save in July 2011 is an example of this treatment we've experienced all our lives. I believe it's due to being treated prejudicially because of chronic pain treatment and plain lack of real care for those who are dealing with serious injuries that cause such severe pain and limit mobilization coupled with disability that limits ability to think and speak and act in timely manner - and - that when in crisis we don't 'speak' the 'right' way and are punished for that by those who could help if they wanted to but don't 'like' you so decide to blow you off. They think you're no threat.

I think 'they' need to be proved wrong. And, 'they' need to feel that pain where it hurts. In their wallets.

This 'fight' for respect and good care is a problem that is so vast it can and will effectively persuade one to 'give up'. 'They' count on that. 'They' are usually right. The VA tried to do this to me after my husband died. That blatant abuse that assumes that you're too stupid to do anything to alter the situation is what makes this happen over and over again.

What they didn't count on was that I could find people in local government, local medical fields and other's with clout to help me fight back and, ultimately, win what was rightfully my son's and my entitlement for my husbands life given in the service of this country and spit on until the day he died by all of the above 'officials'. I won one of the battles. I didn't win them all but I intend to win the war.

I don't like being underestimated. I especially don't like the mistreatment of public servants who abuse their powers of their office and get away with it.

This is what my life has been dealing with while seeking good care for myself, my son and my husband for over 18 years.

I hope it leads to legislation and advocacy that makes this type of F*&^erall something done at the peril of those who think their immune to 'the peoples' accountability.

Thanks for any and all feedback, experiences, resources or interest in what this serious lack of care is doing to sick people. I'm not dying quietly, and I plan to never go into that dark...softly....! This relates to all fields and professions that have direct impact on one's life or death and the quality or lack thereof but most especially for the 'disabled' and their loved ones, caregivers, all affected.