This is the second time for me typing this.............hope it works this time!!

I am hoping that this thread does not cause a lot of harsh feelings, but it is something I think needs to be brought up. There has been several other members that have asked me how I feel about all the negativity in the threads lately. How does every one else feel about this? What do you think is causing all the harsh replies?
Are new members getting the feeling that questions they are asking, are causing negativity between other members?

Please share your comments, suggestions or ideas of how we can make things more supportive on the issues that people are not seeing eye to eye on. Everyone's opinions are so important on the forum and we do not want to stop people from voicing how they feel about a situation.........but how can we do it in a less harsh way?
Can we make a thread only for debates on situations?

Thank you

I can't say I have seen any amount of negativity that has jumped out at me, but I have only been reading cetrain posts so maybe the negativity is only on certain threads..

would you care to share which threads you feel were negative

Rach, Thank you for a great question. I will be brief in my reply. For me, the concern is not the content of the material to be debated, but rather, the emotions that are brought up, because of the issues. Personally, it is important for me to learn how to process the feelings.

By nature of this mode of communication, there can't be. I can't call someone up and work it out nor can we get a cup of coffee. I would love to reach through this screen and shake your hand but I can't. Therefore, I am at a loss as to how to work it out with my forum friend.

I find that I react to a perceived put down instead of taking a moment or more to just sit back and think about it. I find that it might not even be directed at me. Yet, even if it is, I just don't know how to deflect it or appropriately react. There really isn't the give and take. I am absolutely sure that some of the conversations that I have participated in could have been worked out.

This manner of communication is so different for me. The rules have changed and I am at a loss. I am willing to learn. I need a guide.

Took me a long time also

But one thing I have learned here is the "Abillity to speak without" "Emotion"

[QUOTE=Deeperblue]Rach, Thank you for a great question. I will be brief in my reply. For me, the concern is not the content of the material to be debated, but rather, the emotions that are brought up, because of the issues. Personally, it is important for me to learn how to process the feelings.

I think you said something so very true..................it is not the content but the emotions that are being brought up


I find that I react to a perceived put down instead of taking a moment or more to just sit back and think about it. I find that it might not even be directed at me. Yet, even if it is, I just don't know how to deflect it or appropriately react. There really isn't the give and take. I am absolutely sure that some of the conversations that I have participated in could have been worked out.

I think that the majority of the members here feel this same way. Well put DB :D

Another thing to consider is that ADDers often have difficulty processing information when emotions become involved. Once the emotion switch has been pushed, the natural reaction is to fire back emotionally without thinking about the conent and intent the original author intended. When we have this many ADDers in one area, I imagine that this would happen frequently.

For myself, when I feel a wave of emotion building in response to someone's post, I try to step away from it until the emotional side passes and the thinking side regains control. When one of my posts causes a negative reaction, I make the effort to hear the message behind the response and then make every effort to apologize and clarify the meaning of my statements without the negativity.

I take time when I post to make sure my mouth doesn't get ahead of my brain - but it still happens every so often.

David Pershing

If I notice fighting or bickering in a thread I report it and move on...too much drama in the real world to participate in it here. Sorry I've got incredibly important things to do...washing my hair, brushing the cat you know real important things.

Congrats on the mod position.

If I notice fighting or bickering in a thread I report it and move on...too much drama in the real world to participate in it here. Sorry I've got incredibly important things to do...washing my hair, brushing the cat you know real important things.

Congrats on the mod position.
Hey Futs~
My life is just so much more interesting with you in it!

Thanks for the laughs

and don't forget flossing your teeth...

lol I'm just saying that when I'm offended or hurt I find that walking away and returning to the thread later usually ends up with me feeling like a fool for feeling that way in the first place...sheesh really it's in my brain just won't make the transition from there to my fingers. But, I'm sure you get the drift.