I've tried so many times.

Is it just out of my hands or am I going about it all wrong?

I have tried and tried.

I just can not find a calm place.

I pace like a caged tiger.

;) Allow me to repost a message I posted in the peer coaching forum. It really belongs here anyway, but I was answering someone else who had the exact same question.

I have used meditation for my ADHD going on 1-1.5 years now. I have hyperactivity so you can imagine the struggle to sit still for very long. What I have read above is pretty much normal for ADDers when dealing with meditation. You may also want to try walking meditation if your physiology won't allow you to sit still for long. I do this type of meditation a lot and it works well for me.

Yes. it will help, but it will take awhile. The key is to gradually build yourself up to longer and longer periods of time. don't try to start out at 20min, because you are setting yourself up to fail and we don't want that. Try doing it for just 10 minutes/day for 2-3 weeks and gradually add 5 minutes every 2-3 weeks until you can sustain it for 25-30min.

As far as if you are 'doing it right', their isn't really a right vs. wrong. If it is working for you, then it is 'right'. You may also want to try a technique called 'watching the breath' this entails concentrating soley on breathing and allowing your thoughts to drift through your mind. If you find yourself wondering then, gently bring your attention back to your breathing again. You will find yourself very distracted in the beginning, but over time you will realize that you are staying focused on your breath longer and being distracted less.

Some good books to help with meditation (in order of recommendation):
1. A path with heart: a guide through the perils and promises of spiritual life by Jack knornfield. Bantam Books: 1993. ISBN:0-553-37211-4. (highly recommended book, it has wonderful information on meditation and is really atheological)

2. Teach yourself to meditate in 10 simple lessons . by Eric harrison. Ulysses press: 2001. ISBN:1-56975-275-3.

I hope this helps you.
MightyMouse

hello captain,

have you read anything written by pema chodron? (she's a buddhist monk) or Shambhala? (the tradition she follows -- not sure if i'm wording that correctly, but anyway...)

it might be worth a google. i had a hard time trying to "empty my mind" -- seemed nearly impossible. but apparently there is more than one way to meditate... who knew??? ;)

this is a summary of what i am learning about shambhala -- the distilled version. when i meditate, i cultivate an awareness of where i am, in the present, rather than aiming for a particular state of mind.

i'm lifting this quote from the following article, "Why Meditate" by Cynthia Kneen (http://www.shambhala.org/teachers/pema/meditation2.php)

(from page 3 of 9)

"usually our experience of being present is very momentary before our mind jumps again —trying to understand what is happening, connecting things, moving on. In Shambhala, the actual practice of meditation takes that natural process of being present, drifting and coming back and highlights it, works with it, so we can learn to be present all the time. It accomplishes everything by going along with the natural processes of our mind.

There is a tendency in our culture to think meditation is a different state of mind than our everyday state of mind. But meditation is a natural state - just being."

you said,

"I have tried and tried.

I just can not find a calm place.

I pace like a caged tiger."

the beauty of this form of meditation is that you don't meditate with the goal "find a calm place." instead, your goal could be to "be present with your thoughts." that's where i started. ultimately, there is no goal -- i'm not there yet... heh.

this is my interpretation of some of the articles i've been reading. it's been working for me. now i just need to cultivate some consistency! :eek:

like you, "i pace like a caged tiger." (love that description!!!) so, another type of meditation that works for me is walking meditation. makes sense, right? our minds are pacing, our bodies may as well be too. this is where i started last fall. my goal was "be present in the present" and when my thoughts would start to wander, i'd bring myself back to my 5 senses, the crisp air, hair blowing in my face, smell of burning leaves, sight of the colors in the sunrise, dogs barking, children laughing, the bitterness of my morning coffee.

and every once in awhile, my mind is still. this has happened occasionally during meditation. and i recognized the feeling because i've felt it when i see something so beautiful that it takes my breath away. sunbeams get me almost every time... :rolleyes:

i don't need to change who i am in order to meditate, i learn to be who i am.

thanks for being my muse. :)

w.

I rarely find a place where I am calm. I don't really expect to find much peace directly. It's a long process like Mighty says above.

Consistency pays the big dividends. Forming the habit is tough for me. The shorter the period the better for me when I'm trying to get going again but I'll do it twice a day. Even if it's just for a very short period it provides me with a way in again.

I don't expect much from sitting in meditation but big things tend to happen even when I'm under the impression I'm not doing a dang thing worth doing!

I seem to benefit from the practise of letting go. I constantly identify distractions and bring my attention back to counting my breaths to ten and repeating. Again and again I don't focus perfectly and I have to gently and without repremand bring my attention back to my breathing and the count.

It all seems pointless for the longest time until people start commenting that I seem really happy these days. It's all quite humbling.

I run to balance the sitting and it really works well for me when I'm working it.

Good luck. Ian.

As with anything practice and the drive to do it are what gets you to your goal. Sounds like you are trying to empty you mind of all thoughts. That will never happen. The mind wonders to much, thoughts are always coming and going.

You can not ignore them, you just have to accept them for what they are, stray thoughts about everything, your inner mind. Your fears, worrys, Things you have to do,etc...
Just accept them as thoughts and let them Go out the otherside with out thinking about them. Focus is the key and being able to find something to focus on, The suggestion of the breathing. Control the breath and "Listen to it", practice to relax, Start with you feet and concentrate on letting them relax, once you have mastered that, relax the lower legs also. eventually you will get better. I also agree about starting out in short sessions. And practice, practice, practice.

There are alot of good books and tapes on the internet and stores, find something to focus on, the thoughts will come, you just need to let them keep on going out the other side..... bring yourself back to the moment
Its really Just living in this very moment, not tomorrow, yesterday, last week, this week, the here and NOW.
Hope it helps.

In your pursuit of mindfulness, you might wish to consider walking a labyrinth.

There's quite a few web pages with discussions of this:
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=walking+the+labyrinth&btnG=Google+Search

Alternatively, ever consider hypnosis? I recently purchased an audio file recommended at http://www.calming.org - I find that it's extremely relaxing.

HTH.