View Full Version : Vyvanse and my Heroin Addiction


modestvolta
08-25-13, 08:19 PM
Ello, I'm an I.V. drug user. Drug choice of heroin. Yea, been struggling for a while, I'm 22 been using opiates since i was 16. Just been using heroin for the past 3 years. Anyway, I am back on Vyvanse, I took it about 2 years ago. 40mg in the morning. Anyway I've been on a little heroin binge the past 2 weeks, I just had 90 days sober and relapsed. Today is my first day without the heroin. I just started the vyvanse again yesterday, and when I did my shot yesterady it was pointless, which I suppose is a good thing. I feel alright and am not going through withdrawals, which is primarily from taking the vyvanse. Its just my god, I hit a wall in my day, and just want to kill myself. Or just shoot some dope. But I don't want to use, I want to stay clean. I can't tell if its my disease talking to me or if I'm actually depressed. I'm just irritable and on edge, just want to be left alone, but need to be with people. It's like the only way I know how to deal with feeling like that is a shot of dope. Any advice? Will this wear off in a week or two of being on vyvanse and it gets in my system more? I take nuerontin also with it, 300mg 3x a day, and ultram 50mg as I feel I want one. Anyway, am I actually depressed or is it just the medicine? Any similar experiences?

sarahsweets
08-25-13, 08:27 PM
I would recommend counseling with an addictions specialist because the psychological component of addiction is much harder than the physical part.

Nate W
08-26-13, 08:27 PM
It sounds like you are in that dark place where you can't live with the heroin and you can't live without it. I would follow Sarah's advice and also look into NA with an open mind. This addiction is stronger than you, or anybody else that has it.

--Nate

janiew
08-26-13, 09:57 PM
I don't have experience but google "opiate addiction loperamide." See what you think. I came across the topic on accident one day while researching one of my adhd special interests. Can't vouch for it but it lodged in the brain. I recommend drug addiction counseling after your detox. Or during if needed.

Best wishes!

modestvolta
08-28-13, 05:23 PM
I appreciate the input very much. Currently in Intensive Outpatient, it helps a little bit. Just need to remain open minded, take suggestions. I have been attending meetings regularly, still ashamed and embaressed about the relapse. So i've yet to even come clean to anybody. Just guilt I suppose. I need to get it off my back though, maybe that will allow me to progress in my recovery and accept. Things have been going well though with the vyvanse, just having a hard time getting sleep. Haven't really been having those terrible mood swings anymore. Things are only looking up, and I can just move forward. I'm no longer in the quicksand, and I never want to go back.

ferrarl
09-10-13, 02:58 PM
I'm not a specialist in addictions by any means but month ago I finished a book called "Chasing the Dragon" which described the heroin epidemic there in the 80s. I think you could really benefit from reading it. According to the book (which has a Christian point of view), people who had been using opium and heroin for years got free of the addiction in a day and whenever they started getting withdrawal symptoms, praying immediately worked. Supposedly this happened to 100s of people and I'm sure there is documentation buried somewhere.


And in case you are wondering, I'm a sophomore in college.

Oregon
09-10-13, 03:48 PM
Brother/Sister, are you addicted to the needle as well, or is it the chemical addiction to heroin? I've lost over a dozen friends from heroin, and many of them became addicted to the needle nearly as much as the heroin (hard for most people to understand). Heroin is a tough one to kick, but trust me, it can be done!

Sarah gave some really great advice. Please get yourself into a programme and get the support you need.

Debibw
09-11-13, 02:54 PM
Modest, I have never been addicted to a substance.... other than food so can not give you honest input; however I can only offer "virtual" support. You have been offered great advice. Praying all goes well for you.

blondie65
10-17-13, 09:08 PM
You sound like my heroin addicted son. He's twenty eight and is on Suboxone but if he feels the world is caving in on him, he'll stop the suboxone to get high and there is no withdrawal the next day. He is no longer a chronic user, but has had several relapses in the past year. Twelve step didn't work for him as he is bipolar one, ADD, ASPERGERS and anxiety. The Aspergers is the kicker because he processes info slowly and the steps are hard for him. People really do exclude him from conversations. I hope you are well on your way to sobriety and your life is going well.

Raven Poe
12-30-13, 06:59 PM
I was a heroin addict from 16 until 19 years old. I became addicted cause it cured all my ADHD symptoms. Recently (9 years after I got clean from heroin) i began to crave heroin again which scared the he'll out of me. I knew I had an undiagnosed mental disorder, namely ADHD and began seeing a psych. She has out me on concerta 36mg but I have yet to see any improvement at all. I still have moments where I crave heroin and I try my best to convince myself that heroin is not a solution it only creates more problems. I know what you are going through and I'm really sorry. You need to ask yourself why do you crave heroin. Write down all the reasons. Then talk to your psych about those reasons and see if she can put you on meds that take away the symptoms that make you crave heroin. For example, I crave heroin cause I'm an extremely restless person who can't stay still, can't relax, and am constantly feeling anxiety. Heroin used to take away all these unwanted symptoms and that's why I was hooked on it. You need to figure out truly why is it you are craving it. I assume you crave it because it takes away unpleasant symptoms thus making you feel good. You need to find psych meds that take away those symptoms you try to cure with heroin. It takes time and patience, I know.
Even if you are put on the proper psych meds you will still crave heroin as nothing is more potent than heroin. But you must fight the demon inside you and through proper psych meds along with personal effort, resist heroin as much as you can. Find a hobby or something that gives you pleasure and when you find yourself craving heroin jump into anything else that may satisfy you. Don't just sit on the couch, bed or wherever, trying to talk yourself out of doing heroin, that will only frustrate you furthermore, I know first hand.
So through proper psych meds and proper hobbies or interests, along with a strong will I have faith in you that you can fight this demon. But you must get put on psych meds that relieve you of those symptoms that you try to cure with heroin. I believe this is the first step in fighting heroin addiction.
I wish you plenty of strength, much courage, and above all determination to resolve your problems with psych meds combined with life's pleasures. Without proper psych meds, and no real life hobbies or interests I fear this demon will always come back to hunt you and will win as you will have nothing to combat the strong urge with.
If you ever feel the urge to do heroin stop thinking immediately and do something that interests you even a link bit and or call up friends or family to talk to, and of course I will always be here to comfort you no matter what. Just send me a private message and I will gladly talk with you.

Rebelyell
12-30-13, 07:14 PM
You need to go to NA or see an addiction specialist as it sounds like a combo of depression and your addiction talking to you trying to take over again.Were not drs or counselors here at addF either.You have to take care of yourself as well you don't want to get Hepatitis C,pericarditis ,HIV or even OD and die:( Have you ever read 6 am diaries by six from motley crue?

Dmitri
01-09-14, 07:27 PM
Can you hook me up

shane watson
10-21-14, 06:53 AM
Heads upó22.4 MILLION adults in the U.S. used illicit drugs in the past month. These are not some numbers dreamed up by a scaremongering entity with an axe to grind. They come from a governmental agency, the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA). Get a New FREE eBook: Discover the Latest News and Valuable Information on Drug and Alcohol Addiction PLUS 2013 Drug Statistics from SAMHSA - Instant Download: http://bit.ly/addictionebook

sunnydaysahead
10-24-14, 12:56 AM
I don't know if you're still around... but I got off the BLACK.. with SUBOXONE..
and it saved my life,
I'm certain of that.

you can find a dr from www.suboxone.com (http://www.suboxone.com)
or www.naabt.org (http://www.naabt.org)

you never know,,, it might just save your life...