View Full Version : how do you feel during mixed episodes?


Fuzzy12
11-01-13, 11:56 AM
I'm wondering if I have one. I've read the official descriptions, etc but I'm still not sure. I'm definitely depressed, no sign of euphoria or anything pleasant but I'm also uncharacteristically irritated and annoyed, angry almost. I've been punching random stuff and letting out little (or not so little) screams of frustration over the silliest of reasons (like running out of shower gel, dispensing too much of my make up foundation (though strangely, when a big blob of foundation fluid landed on my pullover, I didn't mind :doh:)).

Suicidal ideation is running high as well. Nothing to worry, it's just ideation, annoying and unsettling more than anything else.

Uggh..I just want to punch something. :mad:

silivrentoliel
11-01-13, 12:35 PM
find a punching bag... it might help release a lot of that energy.

that said, during mixed episodes, i feel like every cell in my body has an electric charge and they are just vibrating, constantly. the movement, or feeling of, drives me crazy. i itch to go go go go go, i'm very animated and talkative, but also so very "Eeyore" that the good feelings are always interrupted. i hate feeling like that.

i'm sorry you're feeling this way... have you talked to your doc about an actual mood stabilizer? the one i'm on has done really well for me (i'm on abilify)

Fuzzy12
11-01-13, 12:40 PM
find a punching bag... it might help release a lot of that energy.

that said, during mixed episodes, i feel like every cell in my body has an electric charge and they are just vibrating, constantly. the movement, or feeling of, drives me crazy. i itch to go go go go go, i'm very animated and talkative, but also so very "Eeyore" that the good feelings are always interrupted. i hate feeling like that.

i'm sorry you're feeling this way... have you talked to your doc about an actual mood stabilizer? the one i'm on has done really well for me (i'm on abilify)

I didn't know you were bipolar sil. :grouphug:

I feel both incredibly tired and incredibly agitated. One moment I feel like I just can't move but then when I'm moving I've got this unpleasant almost violent energy in me.

I was taking lamotrigine till a few months ago, but while it did get rid of euphoria, it also made me extremely tired and numb. It seemed to stabilise my mood, but towards depression. So I quit and till this week, I didn't have big problems with mood swings. But then I also quit Sertraline about 3 weeks ago :scratch:

silivrentoliel
11-01-13, 12:45 PM
i'm cyclothymic, but they have me on a BP dose of my mood stabilizer.

i don't know that the withdrawl of the sertraline would last 3 weeks unless you quit from a high dose... would it?

has your pdoc started you on adhd meds yet? if i were in your shoes, i'd ask for a different mood stabilizer along with a stimulant so you don't go totally hypomanic or depressive (although, i think hypomania is what happens when you add stimulants...)

Fuzzy12
11-01-13, 01:14 PM
i'm cyclothymic, but they have me on a BP dose of my mood stabilizer.

i don't know that the withdrawl of the sertraline would last 3 weeks unless you quit from a high dose... would it?

has your pdoc started you on adhd meds yet? if i were in your shoes, i'd ask for a different mood stabilizer along with a stimulant so you don't go totally hypomanic or depressive (although, i think hypomania is what happens when you add stimulants...)


From what I read the withdrawal can last up to 6 weeks and on here some have said that some withdrawal symptoms lasted for almost 2 years. (((:eek:)))

My other withdrawal symptoms, i.e. nausea, lightheadedness, ear ringing etc, have only become much better this week though they are still there. I quit cold turkey from 200mg, by the way. I know stupid idea. I ran out of meds and then just couldn't be bothered to start again.

I'm not keen on trying another mood stabiliser. It's stupid, but I'm kind of scared of gaining weight. I'm also not sure anymore if I really am bipolar. The psychiatrist who diagnosed me with ADHD thought that I'm not.

No stimulants yet. The pdoc still has to send his report to my GP before I can get anything prescribed.

Rebelyell
11-01-13, 07:32 PM
I think I had a mix 3pisode last month, it got to point I felt very high, ,hyper n pressured and it went from fun to kind of scary.1 day I was so hyper but my mood was like irate where i was looking to argue w someone.ive never had a hypomanic episode last 12 days.

BellaVita
11-01-13, 07:41 PM
It isn't pleasant...

Racing thoughts, deep depression(almost unbearable at some points), with energy and also angry sometimes....often times actually...

Stomach hurts really bad and just feel pain. Low self-worth feeling and feeling incompetent. Want to get things done but racing thoughts are like speeding trains in head and make me want to scream. I often end up rocking back and forth or just throwing and hitting things cuz the thoughts won't shut up. So many things to take in at once - but can't.

Delusional, especially paranoid and think people are upset or hating me or planning evil towards me.

But yeah...mixed episodes hurt like hell. Thoughts of suicide/even homicidal thoughts(which I don't like to admit) are common...

Sorry if what I wrote didn't make sense, and for typos, out of it....

Forgot to add: Pressured speech, often people don't understand me and I just go on and on about something...often about something I'm paranoid about or a delusion....none of it makes sense usually or *maybe* very little...

Rebelyell
11-01-13, 09:22 PM
My mind was sooo tuned up I couldnt sleep focus or concentrate for ****.

fracturedstory
11-02-13, 01:54 AM
Scared, confused, frustrated, depressed, oh wait, happy now, and now it's gone.

I think brain explodes is the most apt definition I can give.

fracturedstory
11-03-13, 11:02 PM
This is my second second day into my mixed episode.

I'm in the regret phase of my actions. I keep switching being depressed and fine, to angry ranty and a glimpse of excitability. Anxiety hit last night and I couldn't sleep until 2am. I don't think it was a hallucination because I couldn't see nor feel it, but I thought there was a snack next to me in bed.

Anyway, there's a glimpse into my current nightmare. I'm avoiding people and missing people. Not the ones I fight with because they think I can control being this way.

I tried to book an appointment with my psyche but his calendar system is down again. I'm led to believe I'm not supposed to get help from him because I can never seem to get through to him.

Oh now, don't cry.

Rebelyell
11-03-13, 11:14 PM
Dr told me it sounded like I was slightly hypomanic but I think I was waaay past that point, it was very very uncomfortable, best feeling to describe it was the fight or flight feeling you get when u get off a roller coaster, mixed w dread and feeling like your insides are being pushed over or pressured like in a windstorm.a few days I wanted to fight someone, not like me at all, 1 day I crashed w bad depression followed by 3 days of intense annxiety, felt like I was breathing thru a straw and then joy back to hypomanic, before it resolved itself somehow.

purpleToes
11-03-13, 11:42 PM
Another term for it is "agitated depression." If you don't normally have episodes like this when you're untreated, it could be related to sertraline withdrawal. You may recall I described having uncharacteristic rage attacks/tantrums after discontinuing sertraline too quickly.

I had forgotten about this detail until now (it happened almost 20 years ago) but those incidents occurred some weeks after discontinuation, which is why at the time I didn't make the connection. That irritable, agitated state did not last long for me, even though I had been on sertraline for years, though at the time I had no idea how long it would last which made it even more upsetting. I felt irritated, frantic and angry all the time, but only had a few really dramatic outbursts, and I think it passed in a couple of weeks.

Fuzzy12
11-04-13, 12:57 AM
I don't think i feel as extreme asmost of you are describing. Maybe its jsut a normal mood swings. The annoyong bit is that my mood swings are pretty extreme again.. One moment I feel on top of the world super excited and thrilled and the next I'm in the dumps.

BellaVita
11-04-13, 12:58 AM
I don't think i feel as extreme asmost of you are describing. Maybe its jsut a normal mood swings. The annoyong bit is that my mood swings are pretty extreme again.. One moment I feel on top of the world super excited and thrilled and the next I'm in the dumps.

could you be cyclothymic?

or do you get severe PMS? sometimes that can look similar imo

Fuzzy12
11-04-13, 01:04 AM
Cyclothymic maybe but that doesn't have ultra ultra ultra radius switching mod swibngs rightpms.. . .not right now. :o