View Full Version : A New issue with my sons teachers..

12-06-13, 06:06 PM
So you might remember my other post about the teacher denying him the right to eat unless he finished his work.

Well a new issue has arose and again I'd like to know your opinions (you were all so helpful last time!)

My son is going to be seen by a new psychologist here soon, but in the meantime he's having a lot of issues with the other kids in his school. While on the bus he's been smacking the other kids with his winter gloves (not with his hands in them).

Now they're saying he can't bring them to school? It's below freezing here. Can they actually deny him wearing winter gloves? I've never had issues like these with a school.

He's in a learning center where they have assistants not only in the class but on the bus as well to deal with and handle the children (it's a learning center for kids with ADHD so they're expected to expect that kind of thing).

I'm not saying I condone his behavior but they really seem to be taking this too far. Not only that but they have him completely secluded from the other kids everyday now. What is the point to him going to school if they're going to treat him like a prisoner?

12-06-13, 09:54 PM
What kind of school is this?
It must be private or something.

Do all the other kids have gloves?
Is it your opinion as a parent that being in the weather without gloves could be harmful to your child?

Again, If he hit them with his shoe, are they going to make him wear one or no shoes to school?

This behavioral modification method is very strange!

Put his seat as close to the driver or assistant as possible.
That's where I sat.

No, if no gloves is potentially harmful to your child then you cannot accept that consequence.

12-06-13, 10:21 PM
Try to inform your teacher about the right way to do things. Maybe she’ll respect the needs and feel confident in handling things like extra work. That way she won’t be scared of what to do and hold him to unreasonable expectations, taking her emotins out on your son. It will help her A LOT with her job from now on every year.
The school management system is toward the bottom of this article.

12-06-13, 10:22 PM
It sounds completely unreasonable to deprive your child of necessities.

There is a toll free number.

Have you asked for an IEP? His behaviour issues definitely suggest he needs one.

Also, each time they insist on some sort of punitive situation for your son I'd be getting that in writing.

Most schools have e-mail.

Write what the teacher has told you. Ask if you understand her correctly. Even if they do not answer you have documentation.

Having your child isolated each day is unacceptable.

I'd be asking for dates and times of how often your son is being isolated.

It sounds like he's being punished for having a disability. If this is a learning centre for adhd children, I would question their philosophical stance. It sounds like your child is being set up for problems with other student by abusive teachers etc... Not acceptable. I'm sorry you're going thru this, but no way is any of this OK!

Ms. Mango
12-06-13, 11:27 PM
I'd ask for a meeting to see what's going on and how the school plans to address your son's behavior.

In addition to an IEP, you can request a functional behavior assessment. This will look at all your son's behaviors and has the school develop a plan to be followed by teachers, aides, etc. Right now it sounds like they are being very reactive without having an overall plan of action. They need to be proactive.

Um, Utah in winter is a place where gloves would be necessary. Again, they need a better plan than he can't wear gloves in winter. Like take gloves off in the bus and put them in his backpack or hand them to an aide. For a school for special needs kids it's a bit surprising that they don't seem to have a clue as to how to work with kids like your DS.

12-07-13, 08:52 AM
If they want to confiscate his gloves, why don't they just so it as he gets onto the bus, and give them back when he gets off of it? That way he can't smack anybody with them, but he still has them when he needs them.

I'm kind of puzzled. If this is a school that's focused on dealing with kids with ADHD, wouldn't you think they'd have dealt with an issue like your son's before? He can't be the first kid to have trouble sitting still on the bus.

12-08-13, 11:00 AM
Yes you're all exactly right with your points.

He is supposed to have an IEP, which he does but they do not seem to follow it. He has certain goals he's too meet in regards to his behaviors but so far i've seen no true plan of action from the teachers besides knee jerk responses.

They have assistants on the bus and in the class, I would think they would just confiscate the gloves or have him sit by the bus assistant but they're doing none of that! It's ridiculous! Again, I don't condone his actions but my god this is what you pay those people to do! And They're simply NOT doing it.

And to answer some questions no it's not a private school (I was told public schools had a better learning center program simply because it's funded by the govn't). Like I said I have never had issues like these with ANY school in the past and it just seems ridiculous that they're not working WITH him. I firmly believe his outbursts in school are more so because of how they treat him. They've created an enviroment where he feels attacked if he messes up. Where he's threatened with punishment (of a most ridiculous nature) and they do not get to the root of the cause! The other children know what sets him off but they do not get punished when they purposely make him angry. (I've talked to the teacher about certain arguements between the kids and nothing happened to the other children in question. Only MY son was put in time out)

12-08-13, 11:44 AM
The IEP is a legal document. If it is not upheld lodge a complaint with the dept of Ed in your state. It will get turned around real fast. It's a serious offense.

I say this as a special education teacher.

12-08-13, 11:48 AM
It really sounds like you're right. One year I had my children in a school and it was a disaster. Unfortunately school culture amongst teachers and administration can make or break our children.

I moved my kids the next year to a different school. They both did so much better. Some school cultures are more prone to blaming parents and home environment and resent children with problems. This isn't going to be easy. Please document what is going on and the link above I gave deals with special needs kids, please contact them, they'll know the laws in your state and should be able to give you very specific ideas on how to deal with this.

Hugs for your little one.

12-10-13, 03:10 PM
Yes, the environment can definitely impact their behaviour. My son did great in 1st, 3rd and 4th grade. Different teacher approaches made all the difference. I hope you get this sorted out. This environment has got to be so stressful for him!