View Full Version : Feeling Sad and those who 'try' to help... feeling uncomfortable


ban_ban
01-07-14, 03:33 AM
Anyone who feels depressed including my self can appreciate those people who take time to try to help or give attention.

But to those people who try why do they always make you feel worse if their efforts fail to make you feel better?? Geeze sorry you cant make me happy =_=

The the attention just gets overwhelmingly uncomfortable! Is it okay to refuse? If i were to be physically sick and the medication you give me isnt working cant i take a different medication!?

sorry just ranting =_= (lol) People who try to help always seem to have the agenda of helping.. depressed people can have a normal conversations too you know!!
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Okay so this really came up with me since my boyfriend's step dad keeps asking me about how I am... HE MAKES ME VERY UNCOMFORTABLE. Always in my face and trying to touch me (eg. hugging, arms around my shoulders) SUPER CREEPY.

Just yesterday he was talking to me and said flat out; "I am seeing a professional, my appointment with the psychologist is next week, so ill see whats up with me then." He then goes on to reply 'well if that doesnt work you can talk to me, ill help you out..'

Look im sure he means well.. he is a bible basher (dont get me started on that), but being a psychology student myself I find that suggestion highly unethical =_=

Whats worse is my boyfriend says im being disrespectful and unappreciative of his family's concern of me.

I dont want to seem like a whinger :/ just sharing something thats bothering me.
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Other than that my psych appointment is next week and ill go on from there, not looking for a particular diagnosis just a start.

Fuzzy12
01-07-14, 07:49 AM
The problem is that most people can't really help with depression and their attempts to do so leave me feeling even more inadequate and guilty, in the sense "He/she is trying so hard to help me and I'm STILL depressed."

My mom tries to help me by telling me constantly to BE happy and to anxiously ask me: "You are happy, right?" I don't have the heart to tell her that well, no, I'm not actually.

My dad tries to deal with my mom's depression by bullying her into doing things (which wouldn't be so bad, if he was just a bit nicer about it) or mocking her about her depression.

Pep talks are the worst. Listing all the things that are good in my life and all the reasons why I shouldn't be depressed makes me feel guilty and inadequate. Yes, I know, I've got a roof over my head, a job and a loving family but I'm STILL depressed. Sorry. :(

I'm not really sure how other people can help you. I think all that other people can do is to try to not make it worse. And maybe just listen.

I guess, your boyfriend's father meant well. Maybe that was his way of saying that he's there for you when you need him. I understand how frustrating it is though.

By the way, nice pic. You are very pretty :)

ban_ban
01-07-14, 09:56 AM
Haha thanks :)

Yeah helpingg someone depressed is quite difficult, but having normal conversation helps, nothing overly loaded or with some agenda =_=

I just feel super uncomfortable, dont really like people being too touchy anyway haha I always move away slowly.

Oh god yes, my bf always forces me i don't mind too much.. and we exercise quite regularly and it helps but only shortly.

But honestly I just get angry and try to avoid people in these situations