View Full Version : It's NOT easy


BellaVita
01-21-14, 12:10 AM
To have Bipolar.

*note* - I'm just in a ranty, irritable, ragey mood. And this needs to be said.

Yeah, all of the conditions suck. Majorly. No questions asked.

But sometimes I don't think it is "appreciated" how excruciatingly difficult it is to LIVE and breathe with Bipolar.

Or any severe condition. (or non-severe! It doesn't matter!)

I'm tired of others attempting to explain and re-define what ONE CLEARLY STATED is happening to them/in their mind. STOP IT

You aren't in their mind, *you never will be in their mind*, so stop denying and invalidating - dissecting without thought of potential devestating consequence - other's valid self-perceptions.

Even the most seemingly - benign comment of what's been described above - IS STILL DESTROYING.

TAKE THEIR WORD FOR IT.

Then, once you agree their thoughts/feelings are valid, and with your pride shoved below so that the only thing that peaks it's head is the willingness to cause no harm - then comment.

It's been mentioned before, but I'd trade my mental conditions, more so the "Bipolar whatever" (since no one concluded what I have :rolleyes:) and trade it's existence by getting rid of a leg/arm/so on....

Then others would treat me better.

Sometimes I'm just tired of fighting.

It makes me MORE tired and fed up and "screw it" when I see others posting so cheerily about their ADHD, or minimizing the effects mental conditions have on individuals.

NO ONE'S CONDITION IS THE SAME AS THE OTHER'S.

It's so difficult to "live up to" the standards of this world, set by NTs usually, and cover up and behave in a way that suits them.

Because I know, if I even tried to explain my struggling, they wouldn't "get it."

HAVING BIPOLAR ISN'T EASY. :mad:

And all the CBT, behavior modification, environmental changes, lifestyle and thought-pattern changes- AREN'T GOING TO CURE IT.

I think we need to "take it as it is" a bit more, as in, resist the urge to invalidate others who post certain struggles or try to "make light of it" because all it does is cause pain, further individual frustration, and self(and other)-loathing to a degree that is insurmountable.

(Not everyone reacts the same, but just getting the point across: you can easily inflict pain and anguish upon others by lack of deep consideration before responding)

I suggest: Don't reply at all, unless you already feel that what they've said is valid and your doubt is obliterated.

Thank you.

(***Disclaimer*** Forgive me for making lots of assumptions about people, I am going to the extreme in assumptions and I know it - it's only because I've mainly *dealt* with those type of people lately and all of my life. Also, this thread is not meant to invalidate anyone. Not meant to cause strife, hateful feelings, nor disputes.)

Fraser_0762
01-21-14, 12:38 AM
Edit: Read the last part. I'm not going to waste my time on this.

BellaVita
01-21-14, 12:40 AM
Edit: Read the last part. I'm not going to waste my time on this.


Gotcha :)

....

fracturedstory
01-21-14, 06:33 AM
I will take your suggestion to heart and apply it next time I come across these people. I might also put a pot on my head and start bashing on it with a metal spoon. I don't know why but I think it will make me feel better.

I've been dealing with this too. I'm sick of being told it's my own character or attitude while my brain feels like it's been put into a blender. But those people are ignorant fools and aren't worth my time.

Anastasia
01-21-14, 07:00 AM
I feel I am guilty of this, in my recent response to Fractured, on her thread. I mention it because it applies to this thread and you are present here as well.

I gave a very light hearted, and basically, ignorant response to your update.

Then you mentioned "you hardly feel in control of yourself". Then I realized my error. I didn't completely understand your sufferings and concerns that come along with a hypomania. I responded as if it was unipolar depression, and you were coming out of it. When in fact you still weren't feeling well.

I want to take the opportunity to apologize to you, no matter who or what thought process the thread is directed at.

fracturedstory
01-21-14, 07:16 AM
I didn't even notice it. No, it's been other people who have upset me, not you. And it's still keeps happening. Can strangers please stop telling me I have borderline personality disorder? I probably have it too and have done a thorough investigation into it and it sounds more like the traits come from having a childhood with autism. I wrote an investigative blog on it. I just don't seem to be as emotionally reactive as most people with BPD. I feel as though I've already done DBT.

I feel like I could be borderline bipolar or borderline borderline. My symptoms aren't just that extreme but they are hard for me to live with.

BellaVita
01-21-14, 08:06 AM
Screw it screw it screw it

Anastasia
01-21-14, 09:14 AM
I just wanted to apologize for not noticing you were still hurting, I did not completely understand what was going on.

I was not aware that borderline personality disorder was mentioned at all.

I wish you the best,
Ana

Rebelyell
01-21-14, 09:16 AM
I dont discount or write you off Bella hugs

BellaVita
01-21-14, 09:22 AM
:grouphug: to all

My apologies for any off-the-wall behavior.

Trying to hold it together until I can contact psychiatrist

Anastasia
01-21-14, 09:27 AM
:grouphug: Right back at ya!