View Full Version : how i went from abusing adderall to controlling it. (quick read)


mattman423
01-29-14, 08:48 PM
The key is defining the difference between focus and a rush. I confused the rush with focus for a long time. The rush is the tingling sensation in the brain,the clenching of the teeth and the wide open eyelids.

Focus is being able to think clearly. So focus on thinking clearly. Don't focus on the rush.

I used to abuse Adderall. I would take up to 300mg a day. I now take 30mg a day and I've used my Adderall as prescribed for three months. My addiction therapist dropped a deuce When I proved that I took control of Adderall.

I hope this helps. It took me a week to control after defining what focus is and ignoring the rush.

mattman423
01-29-14, 10:13 PM
[QUOTE=mattman423;1608598]The key is defining the difference between focus and a rush. I confused the rush with focus for a long time. The rush is the tingling sensation in the brain,the clenching of the teeth and the wide open eyelids.

Focus is being able to think clearly. So focus on thinking clearly. Don't focus on the rush.

I used to abuse Adderall. I would take up to 300mg a day. I now take 30mg a day and I've used my Adderall as prescribed for three months. My addiction therapist dropped a deuce When I proved that I took control of Adderall.

I hope this helps. It took me a week to control after defining what focus is and ignoring the rush.

no_sleep
02-03-14, 04:24 AM
I am interested in hearing more about your story. Did you ever find it difficult to stick with just one 30 mg throughout the day? For me it's very hard to control my intake when I have access to them. I consider myself an addict and abuser, but it sounds like you haven't developed an addiction? I would really like to hear more details about how you got this to work for you

Dopes1
02-03-14, 05:54 AM
I am interested in hearing more about your story. Did you ever find it difficult to stick with just one 30 mg throughout the day? For me it's very hard to control my intake when I have access to them. I consider myself an addict and abuser, but it sounds like you haven't developed an addiction? I would really like to hear more details about how you got this to work for you

I've been an addict (to many substances) and I've controlled my own medication intake since I was diagnosed.

Why do I not go crazy and take multiple doses of Dexamphetamine at once to get high?

Because I know that these pills are to make me better. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I misused medication I genuinely need, and they just became another substance to abuse and give up.

Dex is the medication I've been most responsive to. Without it, I've got no idea where I'd be, or if I'd even be alive.

I can't treat it like another drug.

Raye
02-05-14, 11:23 AM
Dopes1-

congrats on controlling your med intake.

I abused xanax for months and had to detox. accidentally got re hooked 8-9 months later..legally prescribed a very low dose xanax, thinking if I didnt abuse them I wouldn't get hooked again.

I didnt abuse them yet when they were gone I began experiencing mild withdrawal symptoms and I knew I was in trouble again.

I was honest with a pdoc and prescribed klonopin so I would not withdraw. To this day I still take klonopin, I don't abuse it and I control the intake very well. Besides, I know if I was stupid enough to abuse benzos again I would run out and be in MAJOR trouble again.

Dopes1
02-05-14, 11:51 AM
Thanks for sharing Raye, it's good to see someone with a similar experience to my own. I had abused valium and nitrazepam for months. When I was in this polydrug abuse cycle, I acquired a couple bars of Xanax from a friend which I tried.

I have heard stories about addiction to Xanax, and I cannot even imagine how hard it must be to have a dependence on it.

I kind of had to quit all benzos cold turkey. I probably should have gone to the doctor and been honest but really, at that point I was starting Ritalin (which probably helped with some of the symptoms) and I was terrified that if I told my doctor I'd abused a medication that the medication I WAS being responsible with would be taken away from me.

Besides, I know if I was stupid enough to abuse benzos again I would run out and be in MAJOR trouble again.

That's exactly what makes me be a good boy today. :)

mattman423
02-07-14, 05:07 PM
I am interested in hearing more about your story. Did you ever find it difficult to stick with just one 30 mg throughout the day? For me it's very hard to control my intake when I have access to them. I consider myself an addict and abuser, but it sounds like you haven't developed an addiction? I would really like to hear more details about how you got this to work for you

When u tell yourself u aren't focused enough to complete a task get off your butt and start the task and you'll see just how focused u are.

I take three 10 mg a day. 1 in the morning one at 1 pm and 1 at 5 or 6

mattman423
02-07-14, 05:12 PM
I've been an addict (to many substances) and I've controlled my own medication intake since I was diagnosed.

Why do I not go crazy and take multiple doses of Dexamphetamine at once to get high?

Because I know that these pills are to make me better. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I misused medication I genuinely need, and they just became another substance to abuse and give up.

Dex is the medication I've been most responsive to. Without it, I've got no idea where I'd be, or if I'd even be alive.

I can't treat it like another drug.

Did you get anxious with Adderall?

Immaculate
02-07-14, 06:54 PM
The key is defining the difference between focus and a rush. I confused the rush with focus for a long time. The rush is the tingling sensation in the brain,the clenching of the teeth and the wide open eyelids.

Focus is being able to think clearly. So focus on thinking clearly. Don't focus on the rush.

I used to abuse Adderall. I would take up to 300mg a day. I now take 30mg a day and I've used my Adderall as prescribed for three months. My addiction therapist dropped a deuce When I proved that I took control of Adderall.

I hope this helps. It took me a week to control after defining what focus is and ignoring the rush.

How long did you go without adderall when you went from abusing it to taking as prescribed? If you really took 300mg a day, there is no way the medicine will work at all if taken as prescribed unless you take nothing for a few weeks for tolerance to go down.

mattman423
02-07-14, 09:13 PM
Yea I stopped for 4 months went back and the first month I went through a 600 mg script in 9 days then the second month I finished 6 days early then I went from 2 10 mg a day script to 3 10mgs and I started taking it as prescribed from there. I don't believe in tolerance when it comes to focus. I think ppl just don't get a rush anymore so they say that they're not focused when they are focused.
I don't have trouble focusing even after all the Adderall abuse. I think ppl just don't appreciate mental clarity as much as the rush.

mattman423
02-07-14, 09:16 PM
I'm bipolar so the 4 months I was off the doc got my mood stabilized with lamictal and Citalopram. But even with the stabilized mood I was hyperactive and inattentive. I dont have an ADHD diagnoses but Adderall calms me down a lot. I don't get speedy I get calm and focused:)

Dopes1
02-08-14, 04:25 AM
Did you get anxious with Adderall?
Hey, sorry for the late reply.

I've never taken Adderall. I live in Australia, and we only have Ritalin IR, Concerta, generic dexamphetamine sulfate (only in 5mg tablets) and Vyvanse has only fairly recently been made available here.

I never feel as anxious when I've taken my medication, at least not compared to when I haven't taken it. I believe when I had the dose that worked best for me of Ritalin IR it did make me quite anxious. 54mg Concerta didn't work at all for me really.

But yeah, the valium was for short term anxiety, before I was diagnosed, and the nitrazepam was to get me some sleep of an evening.

mattman423
02-08-14, 10:25 PM
No problem. I notice my eye contact is so much better. I feel comfortable looking people in the eye now.
Did u have trouble making eye contact before being medicated?

Dopes1
02-08-14, 11:20 PM
What, you mean like, not breaking eye contact in social situations for a long period of time?

I have been able to, yes. I did have trouble before I was medicated, particularly with my psychiatrist and people like that.

execfunc
02-09-14, 12:28 AM
When u tell yourself u aren't focused enough to complete a task get off your butt and start the task and you'll see just how focused u are.

I take three 10 mg a day. 1 in the morning one at 1 pm and 1 at 5 or 6

This underscores an important point that I think many of us, including myself, can forget: the medication is a very important tool, but it will not do the work for you. It gives you the opportunity to do the work that your untreated ADHD symptoms so often prevent you from doing.

I'm up to 50 mg of Vyvanse right now, and it's too much. When I see my pdoc in a couple of weeks, I'm going to ask for the same regimen you're doing with the 10 mg of Adderall three times a day. I do well on the 10 mg dose, but my physician would only prescribe to me twice per day. I think the psychiatrist will do three.

low_dopamine
03-04-14, 12:18 AM
Dex is the medication I've been most responsive to. Without it, I've got no idea where I'd be, or if I'd even be alive.

Good for you. I feel the same way about Vyvanse. I screwed up and abused it for a bit, and now I've been cut off forever and am strongly considering bleeding myself into a hospital.

By the way, I have a question for OP: how the f--k were you able to get prescribed Adderall again after such heavy abuse? Was it the same doc, or did you go to a different one? I abused Vyvanse for a bit, but nowhere *close* to the levels you describe. I'm now terrified that no doctor will ever prescribe it to me again.

Blackstar
03-04-14, 05:22 AM
If you ever feel tempted to abuse stimulants, go read on google scholar how damaging they are on animals and people in high doses.

They basically burn a brain out from oxidative stress, can put people in crazyland and make a heart into a misfiring, swollen mess, if it doesn't pack up and die.

TL;DR:

Want to life a long, healthy life? forget about abusing stimulants.