View Full Version : heavy depressive episode

mrs. dobbs
02-06-14, 04:39 AM
Not sure what kicked it off. I have been off of my trigger foods for a while. My daughter deserves better. I can't seem to move. Tried to keep the t.v. off but now it is babysitting her. She is singing along. I can barely get a cup of coffee let alone get dressed or go outside. It is so hard living in a nother country with no friends or family nearby.

02-06-14, 04:45 AM
I know the feeling. :grouphug:

(though not with the added pressure of having a child -> :grouphug::grouphug:)

The only thing I can say is go easy on yourself. Guilt won't help but will just paralyse you more. You are ill and you can't expect your body to work as if you weren't. I've always felt that depression was as much of a physical illness as a mental one. Well, one with significant physical repercussions. Maybe try and stick to doing the minimum. The bear necessities. A bit of TV won't hurt your daughter for now. Be good to yourself!! :grouphug:

Also are you getting any treatment for depression?

mrs. dobbs
02-06-14, 05:03 AM
:grouphug: x5 Fuzzy. I know you know what this is like.

Not being treated bc I am trying to breastfeed to two years.

My husband also has clinical depression and until recently I didn't realize just how much us both having depression makes mine so much worse.

I don't call my mother in law bc she doesn't believe in or have sympathy for mental illnesses. I am guessing she resents my father in law's mental illness and puts it down to alcoholism. He isn't that nice to her though. I don't want a marriage like that.

02-06-14, 05:04 AM
I've been through this!!!
It is OK to just let your daughter watch TV occasionally if you don't feel up to things. she is singing along, really that's nice and kind of cute!
you could just sit near her and watch too! take it easy. :grouphug:

mrs. dobbs
02-06-14, 05:07 AM
Thanks stef! I know you 'get it'!! :grouphug:
Yeah I am sitting here with her with my leg against her back to she knows I am here. She is upset I am on my phone... but seems to have also occupied herself with her baking set. I love her singing.

02-06-14, 09:46 AM
RE: the breast feeding. I totally get why you want to do this. I breast fed my 3 kinds BUT i was already diagnosed with BPII,GAD and ADHD when I had my third child so the foolish doctors were like "you have to stop your meds while you breast feed"
So I stopped them and ended up in the hospital. Sometimes you have to look at whats best for you. Your baby would do much better with a happy mentally healthy mama right? I am not trying to push drugs on you, just trying to offer a different perspective.

mrs. dobbs
02-06-14, 10:19 AM
I hear you sarah and I know you have been through this. It is a really hard decision and I can't tell if my mental illness is taking more of a toll on her than not breastfeeding would. I keep telling myself just a little longer. She is going to daycare soon, want to nurse through her transition period but not sure I can.

At least I took a shower and got dressed! Yay!! Time to try to get the baby dressed and go outside.

02-06-14, 12:15 PM
Having your first child changes your life so radically it alone can cause depression. Don't feel bad about the tv, whatever gets you thru.

02-06-14, 03:05 PM

sorry mrs dobbs

02-06-14, 03:44 PM

02-06-14, 05:53 PM
:grouphug: I hope you start to feel better soon

mrs. dobbs
02-07-14, 01:37 AM
Thanks you guys!! :grouphug:

Me and baby made it out to the play area at the mall. One of my husband's friends was there with his kids so my daughter played a little with them. But she was so happy to be out and around people that she climbed to the top of the slide and was yelling with glee to everyone in the mall. Also waving at them. I love my toot toot!!