ahalo
03-18-05, 10:33 AM
I have tried reading about Asperger's because I feel I do have many of the traits but what I have found is really lacking, at least where I have looked, is actual explanation from the person with Asperger's of what life is like for them in terms of interacting with people, perceptions, self-esteem, anxiety, etc. I had never until yesterday even considered this, but I am bound and determined to find out once and for all "what is wrong with me". I guess wrong is probably not the best word, but I need to know what I'm dealing with.
I know I have ADHD and the meds I am taking are starting to help with those symptoms. But I have anxiety and I've narrowed it down to a few possibilities, and I am hoping that people here who have Asperger's can either say "No, this is not something which is chraracteristic of me", or can say "Yes, I have experienced that same feeling and perhaps this is something you should look into."
I had started to think that I might have social phobia or avoidant personality disorder, but in looking at the characteristics of Asperger's I feel that is a possibility as well. I just do not relate well to people, due to extreme amounts of anxiety about saying something that makes no sense (because I have DONE this before...). Some of it has been due to the ADHD, but some if it is also that sometimes I have no idea what is about to come out of my mouth and I feel I need to really be careful. I do isolate myself and a lot of the time I can find a focus to preoccupy my mind, so I don't really feel like the isolating is a sign of "depression". I'm not usually sad or unhappy, but I just am not around people a lot. I do wish, strongly, that I could relate better to people. I have a lot of affection for people, in general, from my observances of them, but my interactions cause me so much stress.
I have had migraine headaches since I was 10 years old, and I've also had an extreme sensitivity to the light and things with certain textures (ESPECIALLY newspaper or the paper in old books-- I just cringe touching those things-- as well as chalkboard erasers, etc). I find that I have a very high ability to be extremely sarcastic, but I take everything people say to me literally. They could tell me my hair is on fire and my immediate response would be , "Oh, it is?" because I don't seem to absorb sarcasm or "kidding". I am very aware of everything that is going on and I can get incredibly anxious when things are too loud or bright. Change is difficult for me, especially if I am not expecting it, it can be incredibly upsetting, although my ADHD makes it necessary that there be a variety of things that occur in my day in order for me to keep interest. Meaning, I need to be in the same place with the same people, but different things need to happen. It seems contradictory even when I try to explain it.
Anyway that's all I can get through right now, but I guess I feel "closer" to the explanation for Asperger's than I do for the general social phobia or avoidant personality traits, but I could just be grasping at straws. Something that strikes me in a big way is that I am and have always been incredibly clumsy-- my half-sister is the same way and she has been diagnosed with OCD, she pulls out her hair, and she probably could be diagnosed with ADHD ... my brother is also somewhat clumsy and has OCD, depression, anxiety... I don't know if Asperger's is an "inheritable'" disorder, but if it is I would not be surprised if this is not what we all share. Anyone know? Well thanks for listening i need to stop rambling :rolleyes:
I know I have ADHD and the meds I am taking are starting to help with those symptoms. But I have anxiety and I've narrowed it down to a few possibilities, and I am hoping that people here who have Asperger's can either say "No, this is not something which is chraracteristic of me", or can say "Yes, I have experienced that same feeling and perhaps this is something you should look into."
I had started to think that I might have social phobia or avoidant personality disorder, but in looking at the characteristics of Asperger's I feel that is a possibility as well. I just do not relate well to people, due to extreme amounts of anxiety about saying something that makes no sense (because I have DONE this before...). Some of it has been due to the ADHD, but some if it is also that sometimes I have no idea what is about to come out of my mouth and I feel I need to really be careful. I do isolate myself and a lot of the time I can find a focus to preoccupy my mind, so I don't really feel like the isolating is a sign of "depression". I'm not usually sad or unhappy, but I just am not around people a lot. I do wish, strongly, that I could relate better to people. I have a lot of affection for people, in general, from my observances of them, but my interactions cause me so much stress.
I have had migraine headaches since I was 10 years old, and I've also had an extreme sensitivity to the light and things with certain textures (ESPECIALLY newspaper or the paper in old books-- I just cringe touching those things-- as well as chalkboard erasers, etc). I find that I have a very high ability to be extremely sarcastic, but I take everything people say to me literally. They could tell me my hair is on fire and my immediate response would be , "Oh, it is?" because I don't seem to absorb sarcasm or "kidding". I am very aware of everything that is going on and I can get incredibly anxious when things are too loud or bright. Change is difficult for me, especially if I am not expecting it, it can be incredibly upsetting, although my ADHD makes it necessary that there be a variety of things that occur in my day in order for me to keep interest. Meaning, I need to be in the same place with the same people, but different things need to happen. It seems contradictory even when I try to explain it.
Anyway that's all I can get through right now, but I guess I feel "closer" to the explanation for Asperger's than I do for the general social phobia or avoidant personality traits, but I could just be grasping at straws. Something that strikes me in a big way is that I am and have always been incredibly clumsy-- my half-sister is the same way and she has been diagnosed with OCD, she pulls out her hair, and she probably could be diagnosed with ADHD ... my brother is also somewhat clumsy and has OCD, depression, anxiety... I don't know if Asperger's is an "inheritable'" disorder, but if it is I would not be surprised if this is not what we all share. Anyone know? Well thanks for listening i need to stop rambling :rolleyes: