View Full Version : Guilt/Restless when trying to rest and Rumination


BellaVita
02-27-14, 08:15 PM
I've identified some things that worsen my symptoms...
(many of you know what's been going on with me here (http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=158575))

Yet, I can *never* seem to stop them when in certain states...like current one.

So, I'm *very* uncomfortable with rest.

I feel guilt when I attempt to do so, depressed, also my mind races which doesn't help. Negative pattern of racing thoughts. Then makes me have an even worse view on life. I think of everything that is "wrong" and how unpleasant I feel and eventually feel so restless I feel like I'm going to burst out of my own body.....

I feel like I should be doing *something* (productive, helpful, self-improvement, studying....because of the guilt.)

And then of course the anxiety and depression is exasperated.
And the inability to rest/sleep seems to get worse with each try....

Another thing:
I ruminate. ALOT.

Usually over what I'm feeling and try so hard to control "it"/figure out why I feel that way. Never can. It is out of my control.

Sometimes I become "manic" about it and research irrelevant things which think may have some special answer encoded and hours fly by.....

I've realized I usually do this for hours and hours.

One thing I've found sorta temporarily distracts/eases from symptoms - distraction itself.
But I'm not too keen on choosing distractions and often end up more restless and shame filled and anxious than before....

/end rant or whatev

fracturedstory
02-28-14, 06:56 AM
Sorry to hear about that Bella. It sounds like quite an ordeal to go through and I do go through it occasionally.

For me, I make my distractions as productive as possible. Do something artistic etc. But yes lately I've not even been able to do that. I just watch TV and usually get stuck on some comedy. Oh, it's good to laugh.

I just always make sure I have some sort of productive plan for the day ahead. Sometimes I can stick with it.