View Full Version : Just want to punch something


Fuzzy12
03-02-14, 06:53 AM
Or crawl into a hole and die.

I'm so frustrated. Depressed, angry. I feel like running out onto the road, shaking people, smacking them and screaming into their ear that I hate them. :mad::mad::mad:

Or maybe I should do what predictive texting originally changed my title in to: lunch sunbathing :rolleyes:

Fuzzy12
03-02-14, 07:01 AM
I don't know what's wrong wIth me. I think i'm finally really losing my mind. I was doing a bit better in the last 2 weeks. I shouldn't have come back but I missed this place. Now i feel the insanity take over again. I don't know what to do.

fracturedstory
03-02-14, 07:03 AM
Glad I'm not the only one who feels that way.

I hope you feel better soon, Fuzzy.

Fuzzy12
03-02-14, 07:05 AM
Glad I'm not the only one who feels that way.

I hope you feel better soon, Fuzzy.

We should gang up fractured. I'll fly to Australia and we can go out together and beat up all the happy people :D

Raye
03-02-14, 08:38 AM
where did u come back from?
a vac. from work?

i know u feel this way but punching
someone is not the answer. even
though they may deserve it, just remember
its YOU who will get in trouble.
can u
punch a pillow or bang your fists
on a bed?

hope you feel better soon.

TygerSan
03-02-14, 09:00 AM
Predictive text has taken the air out of many of my frustration fueled rants. When the parking lot is a clustered duck at pickup time...:doh: (tho sometimes I wind up laughing, other times I wind up chucking the phone)

I wish I had more practical advice. One thing I would look at wrt the irritability is when does it peak? Is there a relationship between when you want to throttle people, and when your meds are wearing off? Or is it a more steady/stable state of mind? I often found that there was a period of around an hour or so, as my meds were wearing off, where my mood would suffer. If I was low blood sugar (not an uncommon occurrence), the irritability would become almost unbearable.

Fuzzy12
03-02-14, 09:35 AM
I haven't taken my meds since Friday though normally I do get a bit depressed when they wear off. I wonder if I'm so used to them now that I get depressed when I don't taken them at all. I also haven't smoked or have had any coffee since friday.

Anyway I've just popped my meds and now ill have a smoke with a decaf. And then I have to talk to my family. I hate weekends. I just absolutely hate weekends. Or maybe it's just humans I hate. :mad:

midnightstar
03-02-14, 09:51 AM
Aww Fuzzy lovely I hope you feel better soon (((Fuzzy))) :grouphug:

TygerSan
03-02-14, 09:56 AM
I totally got depressed/low energy the first day I skipped my meds. Rode it out and by the second day I was ok. Never got irritable, though, just listless. It might be better to see what it's like not skipping doses. Less whiplash that way.

Fuzzy12
03-02-14, 10:05 AM
Popped my pills, had a smoke and a decaf coffee and I'm feeling slightly calmer and slightly nauseated now. Shouldn't have had any coffee I guess.

Maybe I'm bipolar after all and having a mixed episode. I don't know. I'm back in bed but I be got so much work and I still need to call various family member,
which is never fun.
where did u come back from?
a vac. from work?

i know u feel this way but punching
someone is not the answer. even
though they may deserve it, just remember
its YOU who will get in trouble.
can u
punch a pillow or bang your fists
on a bed?

hope you feel better soon.

I took s break l from addf raye. This place was driving me crazy. Not anyone s fault. Just nut own. I am not actually planning on punching anyone though I did playfully tackle hubby slightly aggressively,
punched, pillows, my arm and other objects and I've long lasting out little animal screams and lots of growls all weekend long. Hubby had run away to the office. Poor guy. He's used to the random howling, I do that quite often when I'm frustrated

. What he finds really disturbing is that yesterday I wasnt really up for walking lots. The weather was nice and we went hill walking which I normally love but yesterday I just wanted to get home asap and sleep. Even our t friends were stunned because for the first time I was less than enthusiastic when hubs and the othets wanted to extend the walk. Normally walking is the one thing that always cheers me up.

I finally point blank refused to go out for a drink after the walk. I feel asleep at 9pm and slept badly for 12 hours almost. Too much b sleep has a horrible effect on me. Makes me feel dazed and lethargic and sick.

I don't understand what's wrong with me. I feel as if I ve burnt a fuse, or several. I feel as if I'm coming apart and I'm not able to stop it. I can't afford to, I've got too much work.

fracturedstory
03-03-14, 12:08 AM
They are just thoughts. I get that way when I have agitated depression or high anxiety. It's fused together a lot of the time. I do all I can to not act them out. Obviously we know that we will be breaking a law.

I usually just want to smash things up but occasionally such thoughts are for people.

I'm not on any meds.

Today I got called selfish for threatening to slit my wrists. It boggles the mind how some people think those words can help. I was just extremely anxious over being emotionally abused by a control freak.

I'm not going to seek help on my own so don't even offer it.

GeordieDave
03-04-14, 04:30 AM
Awww Fuzzy! I hope things start picking up for you again soon! I would let you punch me in the face, but you're a very strong woman, so it might not be the best idea :P

Have you tried taking up a physical activity as a hobby? For example, jogging. Even if it's for 5 minutes every couple of days, challenge yourself by increasing that to 10 minutes and then reward yourself for achieving.

or, if you're not keen on sport.. Try volunteering. I volunteer for St John Ambulance. I LOVE helping others, it makes me feel happy about myself. If I make someone else smile, then I smile. It's an amazing feeling. No matter how much is going through my head or even if the world was falling to pieces behind me.. There is 5 seconds of clarity.. Where everything in your head is gone, all the thoughts, opinions or sadness... everything vanishes when a patient smiles and thanks me, it's those 5 seconds which make a HUGE difference to me..

There are THOUSANDS of charities you could help. I'm sure there is one out there which will show that beautiful smile of yours.

I think you give yourself too much of a hard time Fuzzy, which is adding more weight to your own shoulders. Try and focus less on the negatives and more on the positives.

Focus on everything positive you have achieved in your life. Your marriage, work, kids?, Friendships, your house, belongings, car, certificates, all of these GOOD things.. YOU have earned them.

Pain is temporary. It may last for an hour, a day, a week or even a year.. But eventually it will subside.

Fuzzy12
03-04-14, 04:45 AM
Awww Fuzzy! I hope things start picking up for you again soon! I would let you punch me in the face, but you're a very strong woman, so it might not be the best idea :P

Have you tried taking up a physical activity as a hobby? For example, jogging. Even if it's for 5 minutes every couple of days, challenge yourself by increasing that to 10 minutes and then reward yourself for achieving.

or, if you're not keen on sport.. Try volunteering. I volunteer for St John Ambulance. I LOVE helping others, it makes me feel happy about myself. If I make someone else smile, then I smile. It's an amazing feeling. No matter how much is going through my head or even if the world was falling to pieces behind me.. There is 5 seconds of clarity.. Where everything in your head is gone, all the thoughts, opinions or sadness... everything vanishes when a patient smiles and thanks me, it's those 5 seconds which make a HUGE difference to me..

There are THOUSANDS of charities you could help. I'm sure there is one out there which will show that beautiful smile of yours.

I think you give yourself too much of a hard time Fuzzy, which is adding more weight to your own shoulders. Try and focus less on the negatives and more on the positives.

Focus on everything positive you have achieved in your life. Your marriage, work, kids?, Friendships, your house, belongings, car, certificates, all of these GOOD things.. YOU have earned them.

Pain is temporary. It may last for an hour, a day, a week or even a year.. But eventually it will subside.

I did actually punch my husband a little bit here and there. :lol:

Not too hard I hope. Oh..the joys of being married to me!! :rolleyes:

I would love to volunteer. I look up opportunities once in a while. I attended an introductory session for the samaritans last year but I didn't follow up since I don't think I can do what is expected of me. I also had an interview of sorts to teach children in one of the more deprived areas of my town. I would have absolutely loved that but the whole thing just sounded super dodgy. I got the feeling that the charity was some kind of front...

Time is a big problem though I shouldn't let that stop me really. I just need to manage my time more efficiently. How did you get into volunteering for St John's Ambulance? What do you do there?

GeordieDave
03-04-14, 04:57 AM
Hahaha oh dear, poor hubby :P That's one thing I am looking forward to. Marriage (a crazy as it sounds lol).

Yeah doing charity work has amazing benefits, not only for the charity itself and its users. But it has huge benefits for yourself.

Here is a good little read about volunteer and how it will benefit you.

http://www.worldvolunteerweb.org/resources/how-to-guides/volunteer/doc/benefits-of-volunteering.html

Make sure they are a well known organisation, all charities should be registered, the number has to be on their website. The great thing is, a lot of charities are grateful for even a couple of hours of your time a month.

I do a few, SJA is my main one. As I'm currently studying to join the ambulance service, I need experience on top of my qualifications, so it's a no brainer to volunteer for them and i really enjoy it, great people, I cover great events, football, rugby, concerts, the air show, running events etc.. I provide first aid, waiting on training dates for advanced first aid and then.. in a year or so I'll be able to volunteer or possibly get a job on their ambulance unit, which the NHS pay them to do work lol.

So there can be A LOT of future potential in a charity, small things and lead into big things.