View Full Version : Teaching a 6 year old a lesson and having them understand the consequence of actions


phantasm
05-09-14, 03:05 PM
Recently my daughter has been trying to test her boundaries, lying, blaming others, being aloof when she should be serious....

She is most definitely a great child, however since she started after school care, she has been picking up really, REALLY bad habits. She is now around older kids, up to 5th grade, and she is only in 1st. She is an only child and looks up to the older kids and is very impressionable. Always has been.

Currently the biggest problems is her lying, and her not understanding the consequences when we punish her. We have taken her privilages away, tried doing a reward system earning points for good behavior where she can trade them in for rewards, sitting her down and talking to her so she can understand what she did wrong, had her write apology letters to her teacher on how she acted, sat her in the corner and had her write all the reasons why she shouldn't lie.

She will do great, for a few days, and then she will get caught doing something wrong, and lie about it when she gets confronted. Whether it's by me or her teacher. She will look straight at us and say she didn't do it. (It being, coloring all over the floor with paint with another kid, cheating on her spelling test even though she knows all the correct spelling - with the same kid, blaming other kids who had nothing to do with her getting in trouble, just flat out lying.

her teacher called me for the second time this week because of the lying, and made my daughter talk to me on the phone. I told her we will talk at home and asked her why she lied and she said, "I can't remember why I lied". She says this ALL the time. I can't tell if she is truly forgetting, or if she just doesn't want to say why?

I don't know what to do with that, and I'm increasingly getting more and more frustrated. Feeling like I am doing something WAY wrong, that I am a horrible mother, and that my child will grow up hating me because I keep taking things away from her.

I am sooooooo confused, and hurt, and losing patience. What am I doing wrong, and what should I be doing right? :(

dvdnvwls
05-09-14, 03:09 PM
I'm no authority on children

But I think it will be important to discover whether she is at this stage of development even capable of comprehending "the consequences thing" in the way you hope she will. It's possible that you're taking too "mature" of an approach for her, one where she knows how to mouth the correct words but can't process the understanding yet.

ginniebean
05-09-14, 03:12 PM
Impulsive children will BLURT out an untruth while a kid with more self control is able to think it thru and reject it as implausable.

The hard thing from the kids perspective is first saying something they know is foolish (after the fact) then being punished for a symptom they just don't have control over.

Perhaps learning a bit more about impulsivity would help. I can say the constant getting into trouble for "lying" impulsively can damage a kids sense of self.

Lunacie
05-09-14, 03:17 PM
Have you read the articles in Dizfriz's Corner (http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=60130) yet?

There's some really helpful information there on lying, on rewards/consequences, and how much to expect based on "ADHD age."

One of the best things I've learned for dealing with lying is not to give the child the option of doing that if possible.
If you know she painted on the floor or drew on the wall, don't ask her IF she did it, or WHY she did it.
Just tell her you know she did it and that she will have to help clean up the mess.

Have you ever, at your age, been stopped by an officer for speeding and lied,
saying that you didn't realize you were going so fast?
Or do you just admit it and say "I'm sorry" and take your ticket?

sarahsweets
05-09-14, 05:18 PM
Some lying can be considered age appropriate.

phantasm
05-09-14, 06:26 PM
I can understand what you all are saying about the lying. The reason it is becoming a bigger problem is because her teacher keeps calling me, and telling me it's a problem. Mainly because my daughter is bringing other kids into it. Saying the other kid did it instead of my daughter saying she did it. It keeps happening. It's about once a week that I get a call from the teacher now. The last three weeks and once the month prior. Her teacher does not tolerate lying.

Lunacie
05-09-14, 06:31 PM
I can understand what you all are saying about the lying. The reason it is becoming a bigger problem is because her teacher keeps calling me, and telling me it's a problem. Mainly because my daughter is bringing other kids into it. Saying the other kid did it instead of my daughter saying she did it. It keeps happening. It's about once a week that I get a call from the teacher now. The last three weeks and once the month prior. Her teacher does not tolerate lying.

Her teacher sounds like she'd benefit from reading "Lost At School" by Dr. Ross Greene.
It's all about identifying where the child is experiencing a developmental lag
and working with the child to come up with a solution.

phantasm
05-09-14, 06:38 PM
I'm no authority on children

But I think it will be important to discover whether she is at this stage of development even capable of comprehending "the consequences thing" in the way you hope she will. It's possible that you're taking too "mature" of an approach for her, one where she knows how to mouth the correct words but can't process the understanding yet.

I agree 100% that I am taking more of a mature approach, especially since she seems to not understand the consequences. I will put her in the corner and she will literally find a piece of lint and have a grand ole time by herself. :lol: It's kinda funny, but IDK what to do.

My other problem with the maturity thing is that my husband is VERY militant. If I didn't say so, he would treat her like a 16 year old boy and take everything away from her and ground her for life. Like seriously. He believes in tough love, since he was brought up with severe punishments. I step in and tell him to cool his jets though, and he usually will rethink the punishment and talk to her on a calm level. But it's a never ending battle with him too. :doh:

phantasm
05-09-14, 06:44 PM
I can say the constant getting into trouble for "lying" impulsively can damage a kids sense of self.

This is what I am trying to avoid. :(

phantasm
05-09-14, 06:50 PM
Have you read the articles in Dizfriz's Corner (http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=60130) yet?

There's some really helpful information there on lying, on rewards/consequences, and how much to expect based on "ADHD age."

One of the best things I've learned for dealing with lying is not to give the child the option of doing that if possible.
If you know she painted on the floor or drew on the wall, don't ask her IF she did it, or WHY she did it.
Just tell her you know she did it and that she will have to help clean up the mess.

Have you ever, at your age, been stopped by an officer for speeding and lied,
saying that you didn't realize you were going so fast?
Or do you just admit it and say "I'm sorry" and take your ticket?

I will hop over to his corner and read up. Thank you for letting me know about the link.

I've never been pulled over. :p

Can you elaborate more about "Just tell her you know she did it and that she will have to help clean up the mess"? I guess I don't understand what you are getting at.

Lunacie
05-09-14, 07:08 PM
I will hop over to his corner and read up. Thank you for letting me know about the link.

I've never been pulled over. :p

Can you elaborate more about "Just tell her you know she did it and that she will have to help clean up the mess"? I guess I don't understand what you are getting at.

If you saw her painting on the floor, or see paint on her hands, Do Not Ask her if she painted on the floor.
That's practically inviting her to lie.

You could say something like, "Painting! What a great idea. But next time lets paint on paper so we can save it,
okay? Now we need to clean up this paint on the floor. I'll help you clean it up."

This way she doesn't feel guilty or like "a bad girl" for making a mess and then lying about it too.

zette93
05-09-14, 07:27 PM
Are there any alternatives to this particular after school setting? Near my son's old school there were a couple of families that would only take 8-10 kids in their home-based aftercare, and they tended to be younger kids. Maybe getting her into a smaller setting with younger kids would help?

Stevuke79
05-09-14, 07:36 PM
Wow, this is a good one. I have a 6 year old girl too and like every age, this is a complicated age. One thing that helps me when they learn new "tricks" like lying is to try and see how it's fitting in with everything she's learning and being exposed to lately. Sometimes I feel like I can look into her eyes and see the gears turning as she tries to incorporate all the new things that she's learning every day.

As far as learning communication, 6 is a big age. They learn to read, write, and to communicate in a slightly more nuanced and sophisticated way. We expect them always and without being prompted to say please, thank you, excuse me. We're even expecting them to start withholding things; if a kid says, "Hey Phantasm, would you like to come to my house and play?" At 6 we expect you to know not to say, "No, I don't like you." even if it's true. The difference between having your secrets, holding things back, making people happy...and barefaced unethical lying, though obvious to adults is actually very abstract.

My daughter used to lie a lot. These days she lies less, only when the stakes are sort of high and only when she has a pretty solid and well reasoned notion that she can pull it off without being discovered. I'm not ready to send her off into the world like that, but I think that's her next step on the way to becoming a healthy, honest, and sophisticated woman who's 100% ethical and at the same time knows how to keep her secrets when appropriate.

Also, ADHD kids get "startled" easily. Adults too :giggle::giggle: :rolleyes: .. I can sometimes see her being like me in that she's caught off guard, startled, panicking.. oh my god it's the end of the world.. and she's only 6 so her coping mechanism is to put on a cool straight face and lie.

Doesn't make it ok or acceptable.

But I guess what my whole point is, just like us, kids lie when they don't know what else to do. That's the reason most people do most bad things - they don't have a better strategy. I've decided that it's not my job to make them not do bad things (ok, it really is) .. it's about teaching them how not to be desperate.

When my daughter does something wrong this is what I do:
1. Disapprove (I don't get mad or even punish so much)
2. Either in the moment or later talk to her about why. She doesn't have to tell me why or even acknowledge why when I tell her. She just has to know that it's the question we ask when we've done something wrong.
3. Talk about better ways to cope with whatever the lie was supposed to cope with. Make an effort myself to model what you can do differently. And when she is in an even remotely similar situation and does the right thing - praise the shyt out of it!!

Sorry.. too long .. don't read

Fuzzy12
05-09-14, 11:43 PM
No, no, brilliant post^^. fascinating. Definitely do read! !!!

I never released how much there is to communication, how much of it is essential learnt and how abstract it is.

Interesting idea that people do bad things in the absence of a better strategy. I think that's true, at least I'd really like to believe that.

Wow, this is a good one. I have a 6 year old girl too and like every age, this is a complicated age. One thing that helps me when they learn new "tricks" like lying is to try and see how it's fitting in with everything she's learning and being exposed to lately. Sometimes I feel like I can look into her eyes and see the gears turning as she tries to incorporate all the new things that she's learning every day.

As far as learning communication, 6 is a big age. They learn to read, write, and to communicate in a slightly more nuanced and sophisticated way. We expect them always and without being prompted to say please, thank you, excuse me. We're even expecting them to start withholding things; if a kid says, "Hey Phantasm, would you like to come to my house and play?" At 6 we expect you to know not to say, "No, I don't like you." even if it's true. The difference between having your secrets, holding things back, making people happy...and barefaced unethical lying, though obvious to adults is actually very abstract.

My daughter used to lie a lot. These days she lies less, only when the stakes are sort of high and only when she has a pretty solid and well reasoned notion that she can pull it off without being discovered. I'm not ready to send her off into the world like that, but I think that's her next step on the way to becoming a healthy, honest, and sophisticated woman who's 100% ethical and at the same time knows how to keep her secrets when appropriate.

Also, ADHD kids get "startled" easily. Adults too :giggle::giggle: :rolleyes: .. I can sometimes see her being like me in that she's caught off guard, startled, panicking.. oh my god it's the end of the world.. and she's only 6 so her coping mechanism is to put on a cool straight face and lie.

Doesn't make it ok or acceptable.

But I guess what my whole point is, just like us, kids lie when they don't know what else to do. That's the reason most people do most bad things - they don't have a better strategy. I've decided that it's not my job to make them not do bad things (ok, it really is) .. it's about teaching them how not to be desperate.

When my daughter does something wrong this is what I do:
1. Disapprove (I don't get mad or even punish so much)
2. Either in the moment or later talk to her about why. She doesn't have to tell me why or even acknowledge why when I tell her. She just has to know that it's the question we ask when we've done something wrong.
3. Talk about better ways to cope with whatever the lie was supposed to cope with. Make an effort myself to model what you can do differently. And when she is in an even remotely similar situation and does the right thing - praise the shyt out of it!!

Sorry.. too long .. don't read

dvdnvwls
05-09-14, 11:57 PM
I agree 100% that I am taking more of a mature approach, especially since she seems to not understand the consequences. I will put her in the corner and she will literally find a piece of lint and have a grand ole time by herself. :lol: It's kinda funny, but IDK what to do.

My other problem with the maturity thing is that my husband is VERY militant. If I didn't say so, he would treat her like a 16 year old boy and take everything away from her and ground her for life. Like seriously. He believes in tough love, since he was brought up with severe punishments. I step in and tell him to cool his jets though, and he usually will rethink the punishment and talk to her on a calm level. But it's a never ending battle with him too. :doh:
Your husband needs to learn that in the exact same way handing out lollipops can't fix anything in the Marines, his style of punishments can't fix anything with a somewhat immature 6-year-old. Get across to him, if you can, that what he's doing is simply not using the right tool for the job, and that little kids being scared of him just makes him an evil monster to them, not a disciplinarian or a father.

I think intentionally giving children a dose of fear may be appropriate in an extreme case such as preventing them from running onto a busy highway. But such cases have to be pretty rare.

phantasm
05-10-14, 12:05 AM
Wow, you all have great perspectives on this situation.

I thought about everything that was said here, and got some relief. I have to remember that she is just learning how to be in this world and that these are the first of many mistakes she is gonna make. She's most likely not gonna learn the first, second, or third time around. And I most certainly am not gonna get it right the first time either.

It's so overwhelming and emotional for me. I grew up with pretty much NO structure and ran wild, so I have little experience to pull from. Only what I DON't want her to do.

Geez, and she's only 6...er almost 7. :faint:

Stevuke79
05-10-14, 01:51 AM
I can understand what you all are saying about the lying. The reason it is becoming a bigger problem is because her teacher keeps calling me, and telling me it's a problem. Mainly because my daughter is bringing other kids into it. Saying the other kid did it instead of my daughter saying she did it. It keeps happening. It's about once a week that I get a call from the teacher now. The last three weeks and once the month prior. Her teacher does not tolerate lying.

Her teacher sounds like she'd benefit from reading "Lost At School" by Dr. Ross Greene.
It's all about identifying where the child is experiencing a developmental lag
and working with the child to come up with a solution.

I agree with Lunacie. It might take a very exceptional teacher to realize what they may be doing wrong though. (I can picture a teacher saying: is it my fault the kid lied?)

tripleE
05-12-14, 12:46 PM
I remember my daughter lying at that age. We used to laugh (privately) at how badly she did it, compared to her friends – it was so obvious, we would wonder why lie at all?


Anyways, it is an age and stage. We weren’t brilliant parents at that time and she did grow out of it.

In Dizfriz’s corner there is something about “what is the cash/payment for lying” and I found that useful when my daughter went through another lying phase around age 10.


In our family, the school is responsible for disciplining what happens at school and we are responsible for disciplining what happens everywhere else. We don’t double up. If something happens at school we just chat about it and maybe strategize for next time


Not one single thing worked better for my daughter then “catching her doing good” like “wow you got caught painting on the floor and you didn’t try to lie to me about it! Good job!” Sounds weird, but unbelievably effective (learned from Dizfriz’s Corner as well).



<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:WordDocument> <w:View>Normal</w:View> <w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:TrackMoves/> <w:TrackFormatting/> <w:PunctuationKerning/> <w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/> <w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:DoNotPromoteQF/> <w:LidThemeOther>EN-CA</w:LidThemeOther> <w:LidThemeAsian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian> <w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript> <w:Compatibility> <w:BreakWrappedTables/> <w:SnapToGridInCell/> <w:WrapTextWithPunct/> <w:UseAsianBreakRules/> <w:DontGrowAutofit/> <w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/> <w:EnableOpenTypeKerning/> <w:DontFlipMirrorIndents/> <w:OverrideTableStyleHps/> </w:Compatibility> <m:mathPr> <m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/> <m:brkBin m:val="before"/> <m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/> <m:smallFrac m:val="off"/> <m:dispDef/> <m:lMargin m:val="0"/> <m:rMargin m:val="0"/> <m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/> <m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/> <m:intLim m:val="subSup"/> <m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/> </m:mathPr></w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="false" DefSemiHidden="false" DefQFormat="false" DefPriority="99" LatentStyleCount="371"> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="0" QFormat="true" Name="Normal"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="heading 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="heading 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="heading 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="heading 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="heading 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="heading 7"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="heading 8"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="heading 9"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="index 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="index 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="index 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="index 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="index 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="index 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="index 7"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="index 8"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="index 9"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="toc 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="toc 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="toc 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="toc 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="toc 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="toc 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="toc 7"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="toc 8"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="toc 9"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Normal Indent"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="footnote text"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="annotation text"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="header"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="footer"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="index heading"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="35" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="caption"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="table of figures"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="envelope address"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="envelope return"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="footnote reference"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="annotation reference"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="line number"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="page number"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="endnote reference"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="endnote text"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="table of authorities"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="macro"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="toa heading"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="List"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="List Bullet"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="List Number"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="List 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="List 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="List 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="List 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="List Bullet 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="List Bullet 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="List Bullet 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="List Bullet 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="List Number 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="List Number 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="List Number 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="List Number 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="10" QFormat="true" Name="Title"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Closing"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Signature"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Default Paragraph Font"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Body Text"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Body Text Indent"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="List Continue"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="List Continue 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="List Continue 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="List Continue 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="List Continue 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Message Header"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Salutation"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Date"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Body Text First Indent"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Body Text First Indent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Note Heading"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Body Text 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Body Text 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Body Text Indent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Body Text Indent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Block Text"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Hyperlink"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="FollowedHyperlink"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Document Map"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Plain Text"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="E-mail Signature"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="HTML Top of Form"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="HTML Bottom of Form"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Normal (Web)"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="HTML Acronym"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="HTML Address"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="HTML Cite"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="HTML Code"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="HTML Definition"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="HTML Keyboard"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="HTML Preformatted"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="HTML Sample"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="HTML Typewriter"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="HTML Variable"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Normal Table"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="annotation subject"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="No List"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Outline List 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Outline List 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Outline List 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Simple 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Simple 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Simple 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Classic 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Classic 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Classic 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Classic 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Colorful 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Colorful 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Colorful 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Columns 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Columns 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Columns 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Columns 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Columns 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Grid 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Grid 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Grid 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Grid 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Grid 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Grid 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Grid 7"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Grid 8"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table List 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table List 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table List 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table List 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table List 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table List 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table List 7"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table List 8"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table 3D effects 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table 3D effects 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table 3D effects 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Contemporary"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Elegant"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Professional"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Subtle 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Subtle 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Web 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Web 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Web 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Balloon Text"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="Table Grid"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Table Theme"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" Name="Placeholder Text"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" Name="Revision"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" QFormat="true" Name="List Paragraph"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Quote"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Emphasis"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Emphasis"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Reference"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Reference"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Bibliography"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="41" Name="Plain Table 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="42" Name="Plain Table 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="43" Name="Plain Table 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="44" Name="Plain Table 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="45" Name="Plain Table 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="40" Name="Grid Table Light"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="Grid Table 1 Light"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="List Table 1 Light"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="List Table 6 Colorful"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="List Table 7 Colorful"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 1"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 2"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 3"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 4"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 5"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 6"/> <w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 6"/> </w:LatentStyles> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0in; mso-para-margin-right:0in; mso-para-margin-bottom:8.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0in; line-height:107%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-language:EN-US;} </style> <![endif]-->

LynneC
05-12-14, 01:20 PM
Another strategy that I used when my son was about that age and lying would be to reduce his 'punishment' if he told the truth. Something like this:

'Do you want to tell me what happened to the light fixture outside? Please think carefully before you tell me what happened...'
His response, after mulling it over for a minute. 'I was throwing rocks where you told me not to, and I accidently hit the light fixture and it broke'.

Me: 'What do you think your punishment should be?'

Him: ' I should pay for the light fixture out of my allowance'

Me: 'Well, because you told me the truth about what happened, you can pay for half and I will pay for half.'

He still suffers a consequence, but not as severe as the one that he set for himself, and certainly a lighter consequence than if he lied about it.
This strategy needed to be repeated multiple times, but it did help with him impulsively lying about things...

phantasm
05-12-14, 01:41 PM
LynneC - I do the same with my daughter. She is actually very forthcoming when she does something she knows is wrong. Yesterday she told me that she ate a piece of candy at school and didn't tell me about it because she knew she wasn't suppose to. I asked her what it was and she said it was Twizzlers and she got it for good behavior from the teacher, but was suppose to eat it at home. :lol: I don't even know why she told me that, it was just in her mind I guess. Maybe she was thinking about her lying lesson, IDK. But I'm glad she still can trust to tell me things like that.

That is why it was so mind-boggling lately that she couldn't tell me about things lately, when I ask.

phantasm
05-12-14, 01:48 PM
Her teacher did pull me aside this morning to chat while the kiddos were walking into class. She said that she realized, over the weekend, that she needed to step back a little bit. That she was just worried because my daughter's bad behavior just seemed to pop up out of nowhere, so it was just so obvious to her teacher hwo different my daughter was acting lately.

Her teacher did ask if it's possible I haven't spent much time with her lately, since my daughter started after school care. And I know that has a lot to do with it. She may be seeking attention, any attention. I have to agree. My daughter and I spent Saturday together, she helped me pick out clothes at the mall, and she needed some new shoes. Then we got pizza and chit chatted, just us girls. It was lots of fun, and was much needed. I just love that little munchkin, and need to be aware when I get too busy to balance my time a little better.

phantasm
05-12-14, 01:51 PM
In our family, the school is responsible for disciplining what happens at school and we are responsible for disciplining what happens everywhere else. We donít double up. If something happens at school we just chat about it and maybe strategize for next time




I agree. I almost felt like she felt ganged up on, when she would come home and have to get the wrath of me and my husband after getting in big trouble at school too.

Stevuke79
05-12-14, 02:37 PM
To that point, if we're worried about lying, people lie when they're afraid. Perhaps it's more important that the consequences be not scary rather than sufficient. (Like dad should tone it down)

To teach a 6 year old to not fear the truth might require artificually ensuring that the truth isn't scary. (being unafraid of actually scary truths might be a more advanced sort of ethical lesson ;))

phantasm
05-12-14, 04:29 PM
To that point, if we're worried about lying, people lie when they're afraid. Perhaps it's more important that the consequences be not scary rather than sufficient. (Like dad should tone it down)

To teach a 6 year old to not fear the truth might require artificually ensuring that the truth isn't scary. (being unafraid of actually scary truths might be a more advanced sort of ethical lesson ;))

Absolutely! I can see when this works, looking back at the times she just admitted to things.

And I did have a long talk with my husband. He doesn't realize how out of line he reacts, and told me to tell him when he is getting to crazy about her punishments. Thank God! I told him that he needs to be more responsible with the way he acts to her because when she gets older, she may look for the same characteristics in guys, and be attracted to people she fears.

tripleE
05-12-14, 05:46 PM
....told me to tell him when he is getting to crazy about her punishments.

Wow that's great that he's open to being reminded to tone it down. very cool.


ETA - very thoughtful of the teacher too - to step back a bit and explain why she was concerned

FroGpants
05-12-14, 06:17 PM
My son started lying around the same age. It went on for a long time and we went round and round about it and did all the things you've mentioned. What I finally did was change policy around here. I told him that if he told me the truth (since he could never be sure whether or not I already knew the truth) then he'd be off the hook. No matter what he had done, there would be no punishment or consequences. I guess it helped. There were several times he came to me and then asked, really? You're not going to ground me? I said, nope, not this time, not since you told the truth. Just don't do it again. I guess it helped, I don't remember having as many issues with it as he got older.