View Full Version : tv-movie-video game violence and kids.


sarahsweets
10-17-14, 06:03 AM
So I've never not followed ratings when it comes to my kids. My 14 year old wants to watch walking dead which of course she can't. This is usually followed by" but my friends are allowed" in which case I say it doesn't matter their not my kids. My 11 year old wants to see pg13 movies and unless I screen them and determine that seeing it would not harm(which is rare) she's not allowed to. I'm no fool. I'm sure my kids have watched or played something at a friend's house that would be a no-no here and I kmow they've heard stuff at schools that is inappropriate but it doesn't matter. My son begged me to let him play grand t theft auto but the answer was not until he's 17. The same goes for sexual content. There is no need for them to see inappropriate stuff when they still have the mind of a kid. We are very open about sex. Any questions are welcome. I just had to explain what bisexual means and thats ok because I want them to come to me with any questions and answering them honestly and frankly is what works here.

Am I ridiculously over parenting? Do you think violence or sexuality can really affect kids? I'm not trying to keep them little or imply they are too innocent to handle stuff like this but the point is at certain ages it doesn't matter what they can hande its a matter of should they handle any of this. I'd like to stress that I am no prude,or not prone to slipping and cursing around them.I always apologize when I lose that filter but I'm human too. What do y you think?

Fuzzy12
10-17-14, 06:11 AM
I don't have kids but it sounds like a good approach to me.

Little Missy
10-17-14, 06:15 AM
I believe you have made the correct decision and since you have already implemented your family decisions do not go back on them. Period.

Yes, your children most likely have or will be able to play or view whatever you've decided is not age appropriate for them somewhere else but in your home the rules apply.

Flory
10-17-14, 09:47 AM
Not at all Sarah I think you are doing a great job and you have a beautiful family :) kids need boundaries , they may watch them without you knowing at friends but by saying you won't accept that in your house you are setting a good principal for what you expect.

Hathor
10-17-14, 11:41 AM
I don't think Kubrick is big Road Runner fan, and I suspect Tom and Jerry may be worse.

No I don't think you are over-parenting, but I wonder if you are leaning on the ratings too much?

Tom and Jerry is an endless cycle of brutality and revenge, what is its rating?

sushigirl
10-17-14, 11:50 AM
I think your awesome!

Violence and sexe are getting a little too normal today. People don't see sexe as special anymore, just normal and everything is allowed. It sends such a wrong message.

Yes, they will see these kind of movies to their friend's house, but you are telling them that you don't agree with it, and that sends the right message. Even if they don't show it, they listen to you and your message will stay with them when they grow older.

Don't stop, just keep at it!

sarek
10-17-14, 01:23 PM
The impact of violent content in games and also in TV on kids(and in actual fact on everyone) is very seriously underrated. It is a major problem and its just unbelievable how ridiculously much violence features in most multi media content.

I used to think light of it, because I also underrated the impact of this on my own psyche until I started to take a deeper look and the underlying subliminal programming involved in all of this. I make it a point to stay far away from everything featuring violent crime. It is food poisoning for the mind.

ccom5100
10-17-14, 02:16 PM
I wholeheartedly agree. My grandson thinks I'm ridiculous, and I know that when he goes to friends' houses, he sometimes has exposure to the games and movies we keep him away from at home. However, I think it is important to raise our children keeping in tune with our values, not the values of their friends' parents.

Gilthranon
10-18-14, 03:12 PM
You're a great parent - good to know your kind isn't exterminated yet - a parent only is human ...

There is a reason age limits exist, and it's your individual duty to determine which ones may be broken and which not for your individual kid

What I hate most about modern society is how kids are exposed to things they shouldn't be exposed to, things that will have an impact on them they don't realize at the time they're exposed to them but later in life will result - and the worst is most people actually let it be that way (this is criminal)

Choose the right rules, not the easy ones. Just because another parent might either have a hidden excellent reason for letting their offspring (go mad), or because they're simply lazy, is completely unrelated to anyone else's snots (yours in this case)

PS - I thank my parents now for many restrictions I've thoroughly hated them for at the time

stef
10-18-14, 06:54 PM
I think the most important is to be consistent, and also stay in line with your own values.
I could tell that sometimes my parents' minor "rules" were completely arbitrary!
mostly i learned from their examples, of being loyal and honest and just basically decent.

Rainbows
10-20-14, 07:20 PM
I think it does give them more ideas and influence them yes. Even with non violent -non sexual cartoons and kids movies, I noticed even my son saying or doing things from it. I do also limit my kids, I try anyways. For example, I grew up on Chucky and when it was on last night I turned it so my son wouldnt watch it( I watched it at his age, even younger and for me it never gave me ideas but some I did get scared of any dolls that looked like him. Same thing ere, the questions are always welcome and talks are never just once! Jack in the box commercials are horrible too!

My daughter is a Minecraft fanatic and I checked into when she started but my friend yesterday told me about this Slenderman thing from it! Oh my gosh I was in shock! I know some things will change now and she wont be happy! But its for their protection, its the same as some parents letting their kids wonder around in the dark a little age, no way! I wont! I dont let my son go all over the place for several reasons, his age, the ADHD, Violence issues, etc etc, but again it depends on everyones views. No one is the same, and one day hopefully our kids will understand why we said no to certain things. Usually, thats when they have kids! Hang in there!

Stackhouse
10-20-14, 07:56 PM
I'm with you. I have a hard enough time keeping a lid on my very hyperactive son with adhd at the best of times - throw in some violence, kicking, fighting etc from the screen and it's an unwinnable situation. I also just disagree with it on principle, too. It has no merit, no positive contribution. I don't let my girls watch it/play it either. For the most part my kids have good manners and behave pretty well (challenging aspects accounted for :p) - I try to teach them that there is no place for violence, I don't hit them and I expect them not to hit others. We have a gentle words and gentle hands policy - I admit the gentle words can be tough when all the boundaries are being pushed.
I agree with open and frank discussions when my kids have a question. I try to use appropriate language for their ages without dumbing it down or skirting around the issue. I find it interesting that my partner will turn off anything with sexual content in it but let the kids watch animated battles and fighting. I think this also sets up confusing ideas about sex when they are older - as though sex is taboo but violence is ok. I think censoring violence and sexual content until their minds are mature enough to process it is really sensible - even if it is really unpopular.

TXJK14
11-09-14, 06:20 PM
So I've never not followed ratings when it comes to my kids. My 14 year old wants to watch walking dead which of course she can't. This is usually followed by" but my friends are allowed" in which case I say it doesn't matter their not my kids. My 11 year old wants to see pg13 movies and unless I screen them and determine that seeing it would not harm(which is rare) she's not allowed to. I'm no fool. I'm sure my kids have watched or played something at a friend's house that would be a no-no here and I kmow they've heard stuff at schools that is inappropriate but it doesn't matter. My son begged me to let him play grand t theft auto but the answer was not until he's 17. The same goes for sexual content. There is no need for them to see inappropriate stuff when they still have the mind of a kid. We are very open about sex. Any questions are welcome. I just had to explain what bisexual means and thats ok because I want them to come to me with any questions and answering them honestly and frankly is what works here.

Am I ridiculously over parenting? Do you think violence or sexuality can really affect kids? I'm not trying to keep them little or imply they are too innocent to handle stuff like this but the point is at certain ages it doesn't matter what they can hande its a matter of should they handle any of this. I'd like to stress that I am no prude,or not prone to slipping and cursing around them.I always apologize when I lose that filter but I'm human too. What do y you think?

Im the same as you, I don't follow the rating system. I've read enough about video game ratings and how they are decided and realized that those ratings are more of a suggestion (It's actually pretty enlightening when you read about how that system works). And as far as movies goes, there are some movies that are PG13 that I'll let my boys watch but I'll sit there with them and have them cover their eyes or look away when a scene is more then they should handle.

From the sound of your post I don't think you're being overly strict, I tell my boys a lot of times, "just because your friends are able to play/watch/do so and so doesn't mean Im going to let you do it."

I think that it's up to the parents, you/we know our kids and know what they can handle or what they can't.