View Full Version : ADHD Girls and Violence?

10-21-14, 10:57 AM
Last night I was talking with 3 NT female friends and - not sure how the conversation ended up here - they all said they had never slapped or punched anyone, been punched themselves, or had a black eye.

I was baffled - I've experienced all of these things. I have a lot of guy friends with whom I kind of mimic my relationship with my brothers, so I'll sometimes punch/hit them or kind of play-wrestle with them. They are really good natured about it and kind of jokingly block my hits or simply pick me up and throw me over their shoulders until I give up the struggle. I've often been called "feisty." I grew up with two younger brothers and always assumed that was why I was more into roughhousing than other girls - but 2 of the girls I was talking with last night have brothers, so maybe that's not it after all.

I definitely don't consider myself a violent person - mostly when I get physically aggressive, it's playing around rather than actual anger. I'd never get physical with another girl because (clearly, as was confirmed for me last night) they are totally unused to it. And I'd never get in a serious physical fight with someone other than my brothers because - let's face it - I'm 5'3" and weigh 95 lbs and don't really have a strong desire to get the s*** kicked out of me. And I absolutely hate violence in movies - can't stand watching people get punched if there's blood, and gore makes me queasy.

But I do notice that I'm more prone to getting physical than other girls - I'd even consider taking up kickboxing or something if I wasn't so horrendously unathletic. I like throwing a punch. I like somehow wrestling my 5'10" brother to the floor.

Any other ADHD girls/women experience this?

10-21-14, 11:20 AM
I love fighting ;)

I had troubles with aggression control as a kid....not as bad now but I'm more likely than a normal NT guy or girl to get into fist cuffs

I'd definitely reccommend a fighting sport pooka.
I love competing at TKD

10-21-14, 11:23 AM
I love play fighting. Hubs and me do that quite a bit. When I'm feeling restless or hypo I box and punch him quite a bit (but lightly :o)..

Apart from play, I've slapped 3 guys. Two of them deserved it. The third one didn't but he thought he did so I got away with that one. I do feel a bit guilty about that though.

Hm, I don't think, I'm a very violent or aggressive person though.. :scratch:

10-21-14, 11:33 AM
Read the bit about brothers....I have two big brothers roughousing par for the course ;) it's great fun

10-21-14, 12:17 PM
Yep, I do this too (or did?)

In high school I ended up getting a bloody nose in a play fight

Also I've accidentally broken a girl's nose it's still crooked to this day (wasn't on purpose!)

10-21-14, 12:53 PM
I used to be a fairly rowdy tom boy and had the nickname, "Bruiser", for a while. lol It was mainly due to my lack of grace and having multiple mystery bruises, but I had a few fights in school and was in several abusive relationships through the years.

I don't recall ever seeking out a fight or being the aggressor, unless someone else was being harmed, but I had no problem doing what I needed to do to survive.

Unfortunately, the strong desire to slap the taste out of peoples' mouths doesn't fade away. Hahahaha! Mounting a speed bag on the wall at home greatly helped with energy release until I learned the deep breathing stuff.

10-21-14, 10:05 PM
I actually used to get into fights back when I was a kid and a teen. I would beat up my younger sister all the time. Occasionally I would beat up other kids, usually only if they really ****** me off or if they started the fight. I wasn't a bully or anything, but I was a little violent and aggressive.

I would play fight with other kids too. I also did Karate and Taekwondo.

I still love play fighting, but I don't do it as much as I used to.

10-23-14, 02:25 AM
I do get a little 'violent' when I'm upset. but my outburst had reduced to 'death stares' rather than beating people up as I get older.

12-30-14, 05:16 PM
I used to have a major problem with my anger and have slapped and hit a few people in the past. I have no brothers. Kickboxing did help me and generally working out helps too. I think I've just learned to harness it over the years. It would take a lot more for me to get that mad now. I think after I had my daughter I promised myself no more of the violent ways and psychotic road rage. lol. I just mentally punch people now. haha

12-30-14, 07:50 PM
My violence tends to take the form of slamming doors, not hitting people.

01-03-15, 10:41 AM
You should have seen me at my teens! I were mostly losing though, so I've learned to bottle up and burn the bottle :p
Still, back at the fencing school my moves were used as an example of "how we properly and decisively fill someone with holes". Everyone else was actually afraid to attack straight on with their swords, and I was thinking "finally I get to hit something!"

Little Missy
01-03-15, 12:14 PM
I have no violent tendencies at all whatsoever.

But, if I were to be threatened in any way no rules apply.

01-10-15, 11:52 AM
i'm non violent. i don't really understand fighting. if i'm going to lay a hand on someone, i'm not looking for a fight. i'd be looking to put them down and/or scare them ****less. and i have yet to run across a situation that needed that.

01-10-15, 12:24 PM
I haven't been physically violent with anyone. My younger sister and I used to hit each other growing up but she was more aggressive than me for sure and she also has ADHD-I (Undiagnosed).

01-10-15, 08:55 PM
Mine does too lunacie. But I love play fighting with my gf and laughing and stuff but if it got out of hand and one of us said stop we would and check each other out and respect each other.i really try to not do that tho and touch her lightly gently and erotically soft but hey a pillow fight is cool and if I get hit your game :p

Canadian Mess
01-10-15, 11:02 PM
I've always been discribed as a tomboy- I never sat still, struggled to keep on task, always on the go, energetic, no problem playing with the guys... I got in a lot of trouble in elementary school for getting into fights- I didn't put up with bullies and created my own "playground police force" to deal with them. We would recruit the younger grades and have them distract the supervisors on the playground and beat up the bullies when their backs were turned.

Now as an adult, I still struggle with my impulsive nature and tomboyishness? I let it out not in violence or anger but through kickboxing, weight lifting and working out so I don't get in trouble for it. Especially as I go physco during PMDD and get into fights, arguments and go crazy so I need an outlet for my pent up energy and emotions.