View Full Version : 504 Meeting

11-20-14, 10:26 PM
My son's psychiatrist asked me to start the process for getting a 504 set up. My son is in kindergarten but was diagnosed as a preschooler. He is doing well now but the Dr. doesn't want to wait for us to need the 504 before putting in place a few accommodations. He told me he usually fills out a form and it's a relatively easy process. When I reached out to start the process my contact insisted that she know exactly what I was asking for before we met. Then she wanted a letter from the Dr. which he provided.

Well I was distraught this morning when I met with the school. The lady was basically sent to talk me out of it and tell me he didn't need it, they don't like giving 504s to kindergarteners, and on and on. After 15 minutes of feeling berated I stood up, mad as can be with tears streaming down my face and walked to the door. I told her I would call my son's Dr. and see what the next steps are since she was refusing to proceed. She then blocked the door so I couldn't leave and told me she didn't want me to leave mad. I told her it was too late. A few other things were said and I moved past her and left. She then begged me to talk to the school counselor and that's when I found out the school counselor does the 504s and no one even told her I had requested one. Later that afternoon the school counselor called me and calmly explained the process and told me they would get started right away.

Just wanted to vent to folks who would understand my frustration. I'm just trying to follow my Dr.'s advice, help my child and they act like I'm asking for a kidney.

11-21-14, 12:49 PM
They have no right to deny you without going through a proper evaluation. Send a letter (Certified Mail - Return Receipt Requested) requesting such an evaluation. Under the law, they must honor your request.

Here's a link to a sample letter:

You should also familiarize yourself with your rights by checking out the wrightslaw website:

Don't let them bully you.

11-21-14, 01:07 PM
MommysBears - you've done everything exactly right and handled yourself very well.

For someone to deny my child or grandchild what the doctor says s/he needs,
and then to block me from leaving ... I'd have been getting physical.

Not hitting, but pushing my way out. I'd have gone home, cooled off and called
the district office to complain.

I'm glad you didn't have to fight for the process to get started and hope it all
goes much better now that the counselor is involved.

Odds are though, that the principal sent the woman in to dissuade you, and will
not be easy to work with. We were in that situation for six years before they
made my granddaughter so oppositional that she was moved to a special school
for behavior problems.

One year there with a wonderful principal who worked with us and the district
autism coordinator and the district opened a new classroom in a different school
where my granddaughter has blossomed and is doing really well now. :)

11-22-14, 06:31 PM
My blood would be boiling, too. I'd be very tempted to figure out who to make a complaint to at the district or state level...

11-23-14, 12:50 PM
Thank you all for sharing your frustrations with me! I will familiarize myself with the laws and my rights before the next meeting. My child's Dr. is stunned as he has never had a parent meet this much opposition. I found out my son's kindergarten teacher was the one who sent this lady to talk me out of the 504. I guess she didn't want to go through all the work involved.

11-23-14, 02:35 PM
To learn about your rights, read the book From Emotions to Advocacy by Peter Wright.

I'd highly suggest finding an educational advocate (this is a consultant, not an attorney) to take with you to the first meeting. On the low end they cost around $50-$60/hr. Sometimes just having one with you makes the school sit up and follow the right procedures without them saying a word. If you're worried that this might seem too adversarial, don't be. They've earned it.

11-23-14, 03:02 PM
what the WHAT...who the hell was that lady?? She blocked you from leaving?? That is so completely inappropriate. This is terrible!!

12-11-14, 06:04 PM
So back to school today for the initial meeting in the process. This time the special ed teacher was very nice to me. We determined my son didn't need to be evaluated for special ed services so a 504 would be the most logical choice. She commented that it still didn't mean I would get a 504 or he would qualify for one.

I thought having ADHD automatically qualified you for a 504. I'm not sure what to expect next.

12-11-14, 07:11 PM
This information might be helpful:

Some of this may already be taking place, if not, you'll know what you need.

12-12-14, 05:22 AM
Remember that schools do not want more students that need special services. It costs them money. I hate to sound jaded but everything I've ever had to get my kids has only come about with a fight. They have bottom lines just like any company.

12-18-14, 05:56 PM
My son was initially denied a 504 plan. Though his condition does qualify him, it has to be "impacting a major life function". If he has good grades, they will often try to use this as a deciding factor for a denial.

A year later, when my son was finally failing, I was finally approved. But I was livid the first time around. And I had educated myself before the meeting. The school psychologist was a nightmare.