View Full Version : ...in addition to ADHD?


meghuneyntyson
12-13-14, 11:33 AM
It's been quite a while! I was looking through some of my old posts here and walking down a not-so-great memory lane.

Recap: I met a great guy and fell head over heels in love. He didn't have his son at the time and I was told that the son was a great, normal 5 year old whose mother snatched him and he had no clue where he was. Got his son back and I realized that he was actually a GREAT kid with something else going on. Was diagnosed with pretty severe ADHD. Started off on Concerta. Repeated kindergarten and changed schools. Had to sit by himself away from everyone to concentrate at all. Added Methlyn to the morning routine, made a world of difference.

During all of this, we separated to give the father a chance to step up more to the plate with his son. It did the trick and everything is great. He still sometimes ignores some things but I bring it to his attention and he gets it.

Now, we are addressing the "something else" that is going on other than ADHD. We aren't quite sure what it is and its hard to explain. It's just clear that something is off.

My mother came with me to my stepson's Thanksgiving program. They were counting and using their fingers. All the kids in the class were getting it but him. I didn't say a word but my mother noticed and mentioned it. If you ask him why he did something wrong, his response is "Because I'm not supposed to." Not in a smarty pants way. He is the absolute sweetest kid, but he doesn't get the question at all.

Looking at a sheet of paper with numbers listed 1 to 100, he can have his finger on the number 20. You ask him what number comes after 20 and he has no idea. I ask him, "When you had a birthday when you were 5, what came after that?". He says "I was 6!". Ok, "so what comes after 20?". He doesn't know and will start crying.

And it isn't me nitpicking. His father mentioned to me this morning that he realizes something is off too. His son doesn't understand the simplest of questions. His psychiatrist was asking him about school and he caught it too and thinks he should see a counselor for therapy and maybe further testing.

I'm just wondering if anyone else has had any experience with anything similar. I have no idea how long it will take to get all of this addressed and pin-pointed.

amber3902
12-13-14, 12:31 PM
You may want to consider having him tested for learning disabilities.

My advice though is to keep an eye on it and see what else you notice. Right now, you have a gut feeling that something is "not right", but you don't have enough "evidence" to pinpoint what it could possibly be.

I started noticing things with my older daughter when she was 10, but I couldn't pinpoint it with any accuracy until two years later. I'm not suggesting waiting two years, though, I'm just saying right now you only have a couple of examples that for me don't sound like any specific learning disability that I know of, and trust me, I have personal experience with a few of them. My older daughter has an auditory processing disorder and ADHD- primarily inattentive. My younger daughter has dyslexia and ADHD-primarily inattentive. But it took me a little while to compile a list of symptoms and then I started checking them against learning disabilities until I had a good feeling what the issue was.

Keep writing these things down, learn about learning disabilities and once you have a good indication of what you think it might be, have him tested. I would also advise you NOT to ask the school to test him, in my experience that is a waste of time. Even though the school will do it for free, their tests are not comprehensive enough to find out what's REALLY wrong. What you will need to request is a psycho-educational test. Learn about this test and where in your area you can have it done outside the school system.

Good luck.

Oh yeah, depending on where you go to have him tested, it could take anywhere from six months to a year before you have a diagnosis and can start getting him help. Most places that do this kind of testing have waiting lists, but the wait is worth it in the end. You could d*ck around with the school system for even longer than that and at the end of it not be any closer to getting him help. I think the fastest route is to get a diagnosis outside the school system, then go to the school with the diagnosis and request special ed/504. I did this with my second daughter. I requested an evaluation outside the school system in May. She was evaluated in September, I had the school's evaluation started in October and they just determined she qualifies for special ed this past week. She should start receiving services in January/February. So from start to finish about ten months. With my first daughter I went through the school system first, and it took two YEARS before I got a 504 for her.

zette93
12-13-14, 12:58 PM
Read up on Dyscalculia. The National Center for Learning Disorders is a good starting point: http://www.ncld.org/

Warning Signs in Preschool or Kindergarten


Has trouble learning to count, especially when it comes to assigning each object in a group a number
Has trouble recognizing number symbols, such as making the connection between “7” and the word seven
Struggles to connect a number to a real-life situation, such as knowing that “3” can apply to any group that has three things in it—3 cookies, 3 cars, 3 kids, etc.
Has trouble remembering numbers, and skips numbers long after kids the same age can count numbers and remember them in the right order
Finds it hard to recognize patterns and sort items by size, shape or color
Avoids playing popular games like Candy Land that involve numbers, counting and other math concepts

Warning Signs in Grade School or Middle School


Has trouble recognizing numbers and symbols
Has difficulty learning and recalling basic math facts, such as 2 + 4 = 6
Struggles to identify +, ‒ and other signs and use them correctly
May still use fingers to count instead of using more sophisticated strategies
Has trouble writing numerals clearly or putting them in the correct column
Has trouble coming up with a plan to solve a math problem
Struggles to understand words related to math, such as greater than and less than
Has trouble telling his left from his right, and has a poor sense of direction
Has difficulty remembering phone numbers and game scores
Avoids playing games like Risk that involve number strategy
Has trouble telling time

Lunacie
12-13-14, 01:04 PM
Read up on Dyscalculia. The National Center for Learning Disorders is a good starting point: http://www.ncld.org/

Warning Signs in Preschool or Kindergarten


Has trouble learning to count, especially when it comes to assigning each object in a group a number
Has trouble recognizing number symbols, such as making the connection between “7” and the word seven
Struggles to connect a number to a real-life situation, such as knowing that “3” can apply to any group that has three things in it—3 cookies, 3 cars, 3 kids, etc.
Has trouble remembering numbers, and skips numbers long after kids the same age can count numbers and remember them in the right order
Finds it hard to recognize patterns and sort items by size, shape or color
Avoids playing popular games like Candy Land that involve numbers, counting and other math concepts

Warning Signs in Grade School or Middle School


Has trouble recognizing numbers and symbols
Has difficulty learning and recalling basic math facts, such as 2 + 4 = 6
Struggles to identify +, ‒ and other signs and use them correctly
May still use fingers to count instead of using more sophisticated strategies
Has trouble writing numerals clearly or putting them in the correct column
Has trouble coming up with a plan to solve a math problem
Struggles to understand words related to math, such as greater than and less than
Has trouble telling his left from his right, and has a poor sense of direction
Has difficulty remembering phone numbers and game scores
Avoids playing games like Risk that involve number strategy
Has trouble telling time


I don't remember any of those signs from kindergarten, but the rest of them sure ring a bell for me.

I hadn't seen this list before and it just confirms my self-diagnosis of dyscalculia.

No wonder I pretty much failed freshman algebra.

meghuneyntyson
12-13-14, 02:10 PM
I don't know if it's Discalculia. Some of those things he does just fine. Some he has a hard time with. On a test, they asked which column had more than the other. He circled the one with less and it was perfectly clear which one had more. But then he got one of those right later in the test. So it could be just a focus thing. Or it actually COULD be that.


But that's the problem, I don't know WHAT it is. It's SOMETHING though. And its not just in Math. It's just everyday things.

For example yesterday, I woke him up and told him to use the bathroom and then get dressed. He said he had to go to the bathroom. :umm1: "Ok, well go. I just said to go. Nobody is in the bathroom, honey." The bathroom is literally four steps away from his room.

I went to go finished getting dressed myself. Next thing I know, he is yelling out that he peed on himself. :doh: I just told him to go to the bathroom when he said he had to go. It's like it didn't connect for him.

And again, his father has noticed too. "I just told you to put that up. But you're sitting here playing with it. Why?" his answer: "Because I'm not supposed to." His father "But that's not an answer. Why didn't you put it up when I told you to?". Him: "Because I'm supposed to be good." :scratch:

His psychiatrist thinks he should see a counselor for therapy and we start next month. Maybe then I can get an idea of maybe what's wrong and get him tested.

zette93
12-13-14, 06:23 PM
Maybe look into CAPD -- Central Auditory Processing Disorder.

Unmanagable
12-13-14, 07:08 PM
Were there any traumatic experiences from when he was "snatched by his mom" and his dad didn't know where he was that may be at the root of the issue? What makes me think that is him responding with, "Because I'm not supposed to." and "Because I'm supposed to be good."

BellaVita
12-13-14, 07:45 PM
I don't remember any of those signs from kindergarten, but the rest of them sure ring a bell for me.

I hadn't seen this list before and it just confirms my self-diagnosis of dyscalculia.

No wonder I pretty much failed freshman algebra.

Yeah, I've got it too.

I had to memorize EVERY problem I could think of for tests and quizzes, without actually knowing how to do the problems.

When I was younger (middle school) I went to a psychologist and he did some tests and said that eventually my wires would "cross" in my brain and I wouldn't count on my fingers anymore.....never happened.

I still don't know left from right.

I can't follow directions.

I can't do word math problems.

Can't read a clock.

Oddly enough, I was always in advanced math but that was because I spent on average 5 hours per homework assignment and had a tutor.

Lunacie
12-13-14, 10:56 PM
Yeah, I've got it too.

I had to memorize EVERY problem I could think of for tests and quizzes, without actually knowing how to do the problems.

When I was younger (middle school) I went to a psychologist and he did some tests and said that eventually my wires would "cross" in my brain and I wouldn't count on my fingers anymore.....never happened.

I still don't know left from right.

I can't follow directions.

I can't do word math problems.

Can't read a clock.

Oddly enough, I was always in advanced math but that was because I spent on average 5 hours per homework assignment and had a tutor.

Great memory. :) If it isn't set to music or rhymes, I can't memorize anything.

I still count on my fingers. Still mix up left and right - east and west - have
trouble following directions. Can't do word math problems.

I can generally read a clock, but my adult daughter still struggles with that.

My big brother tried to tutor me in math (he sucked) in return for me
correcting his spelling.

meghuneyntyson
12-14-14, 05:50 PM
Were there any traumatic experiences from when he was "snatched by his mom" and his dad didn't know where he was that may be at the root of the issue? What makes me think that is him responding with, "Because I'm not supposed to." and "Because I'm supposed to be good."

Not to my knowledge. When you ask him any questions, he acts like nothing is wrong and nothing has gone on.

Did you have fun at your mom's? "Yes." What did you do? "Play with my brothers and sister." That's it. You can't get much out of him.