View Full Version : Broken


childatheart
12-23-14, 04:27 PM
I wasn't supposed to be like this.
I never wanted to become this.
I didn't know that I was
different
broken
until they told me that I was.
I didn't know
I had an existential way of being
until they told me it was wrong.

I never wanted to be wrong!
Don't you understand that?!
I never wanted to be a broken record
saying the same thing
over
and over
and over again!

I never asked
to have this scarlet letter
branded into my skin,
have it burned into my DNA.

I never wanted to be lost thoughts and lost friends,
never wanted to be broken promises and broken dreams.
I never wanted this terrifying thing to be a part of me!

I never wanted to watch myself waste away
because I couldn't get myself to live.

Don't you think that if I could have fixed myself by now, I would have?
That if I could mend my mind back together, I wouldn't do it in a heartbeat?

I never wanted to have the
ocean living inside my chest,
never wanted to be a wild forest fire,
good for burning, destroying, lighting, igniting,
but never just good.

I never wanted to hurt the ones I love.
I never wanted to hate myself.
I never wanted to be so broken.