View Full Version : Crazy Funtimes With Doctor Stan and Brother Jeremy


Baal Moom
03-15-15, 11:15 PM
EDIT: I think it's safe to say that I'm not on doctor Stan's side on any political or social matters.

"Learn to regulate your powers of Seeing," my nan used to say, but she was burned at the stake. Jeremy, where have I put my glasses? You son of a demon she-devil, take them out of there and hand them over. Wipe first! We need to talk about your insubordination. For instance, where do you keep all of the monster glue? Model... aeroplanes? For the hundredth time, the glue is needed in the reanimation process, because blood doesn't do it. You saw Vic's experiment -- got all out of control. Too clever for it's own good. We need cheap, available menial labourers, to solve the immigrant workers' problem. Bloody foreigners, spreading like locusts. What? A golem? Do I look like a filthy Jewboy to you? I, doctor Stanislaus von Kreuzenberg-Cohen, will not stand to such vile accusations. Jeremy, you're fired. Here's a bullet in the head to show you out of the door.

Lower class, semi-human filth. "A golem," indeed. Well, I'll scoop your brain out, Jerr. The body is premium, but I could do without the personality, and a lump of moldy hay will serve you just as well. Right ho, where's the chainsaw. Wait, where's my head? Stan, you old fool, you forgot to put him on the operating table! Silly me. Har har har.

What's that? A tumor? It's slimy and... pulsating? Aren't you dead, Jerr? The colours are magnificent, though. All the colours of the rainbow and more, beautifully intertwined, and how fabulously does the pattern change with every beat...

To be continued and revised. Maybe.