View Full Version : He won't get help


mamaluv
04-06-15, 07:16 PM
I absolutely adored his light heartedness and sense of adventure in the beginning. After almost 7 years I gave my last ounce of effort to try to make our relationship work for me. I was so lonely because he was always running the roads. Running away from responsibilities and running from himself. I kept myself busy with my kids, friends, hobbies but all I got from him was a few minutes at the end of the day. He was 'always' on his phone while he was with me. I was never really able to rely on him. My sweetheart has ADHD and refuses meds and will not go to therapy. He says pot helps him not fidget, but he also wants to drink most days as well.

It breaks my heart and I somehow feel guilty for leaving (yesterday btw), but I'm finding it unhealthy for me. He is never able to maintain any stability. It was draining me, making me bitter. I have a child I need to guide and have energy for.

I did everything in my power to help him, but he needs more help than I could offer. He cried a lot last night and today he had some really nasty words for me and I know I am in for a nasty, nasty next couple of weeks but I am responsible for my own happiness. I needed to be the one to change the situation. I miss him, my heart is heavy but it just was not enough. I hope he gets the help he needs.

Pentax
04-06-15, 08:53 PM
Love to you, mamaluv. Take it one day at a time, right now. remember that you're not those nasty words, you're looking for your way and caring for your child. I can see that you love him. Wish I could give you more. One day at a time.

pentax

mamaluv
04-07-15, 07:03 AM
Thank you for your kind words Pentax. My heart is so huge. I worry about him but he needs help. One day at a time.

Lunacie
04-07-15, 01:40 PM
Self-medicating is common, but if he won't even consider trying anything else
he didn't leave you with much choice. Take care of yourself and your little one.

Fuzzy12
04-07-15, 06:28 PM
Can't say it better than you did in your op, mamaluv. I think, you did what's best for all of you in these circumstances.

TLCisaQT
04-14-15, 08:32 PM
my heart goes out to you. sometimes loving somebody just isn't enough. I hope for all of your sake that he will see he needs more help than he can offer himself. You do need to take care of what is ultimately best for you and your child. Keep us updated and I hope you can find some compassion and support here. I have been in a situation many times of wondering if I have needed to leave...or not... it's such a difficult spot to be in, and I'm sure even harder to do it...

sarahsweets
04-17-15, 04:45 AM
If loved was enought, we would all have managed life differently.