View Full Version : Behavior Therapy

04-24-15, 06:18 PM
OK... This could be a long winded post LOL.

I was diagnosed with ADHD almost 2 years ago. I was not disruptive in school. I made very good grades without much effort. I was a very sloppy person. I left things wherever I got through with them ( clothes in the floor where I took them off... tools laying around whatever I was working on when I completed a task. etc)

I have pondered over the past 2 years. I have always seen a lot of my tendencies in my dad. He is currently 67. He has never been diagnosed with ADHD but has a lot of symptoms that point to ADHD. unorganized, anger issues, bad communcation, etc...

I was reading a post on here the other day and behavior therapy was mentioned . ( it was the post where someone was going to a day camp thing a ma bob)

A little family history is in order.

My dad quit high school in 1965 ( he was a junior) to run auto parts store that my grandfather was starting to supply parts to my uncles garage... ( we live in a very rural area of ALabama)
My father has never worked for anyone else but himself.
The business was very successful and flourished throughtout the 70' 80's and early 90's. I was always preened to take over the business when I got old enough. I worked hard and was very optimistic after graduating high school that I would be running the store by the time I was in my early 20's.
My mom also worked in the business. She managed the book keeping as well as waiting on customers that came in looking for parts. I was never given any single responsiblity. We all did everything so to speak... My dad's hand was involved in everything... there was never a relinquish of any control of a certain aspect of the business. We all answered the phone as well as waited on customers coming in and was responsible for ordering whatever parts we sold or did not have that a customer needed. So we all wore many hats. I tried early on to see if we could get a system where someone had a specific responsibility to try and make the situation work better. The current system did not work for me. I would forget to order something a lot . LOL which made me appear not to care about the business. I feel my dad had a system that worked for him... but it did not work for me. In the mid 90's was on a roller coaster of emotions where Iwas optimistic of taking over one week to being discouraged and helpless and not capable of running the business on my own. Eventually I got a opportunity to leave the family business to teach automechanics at a local high school career tech center... this was ok to begin with but lacked any structure in how to set up my curriculum etc... I taught the first year with out any curriculum and tried to teach the students things I felt were imperative to build a good foundation. ALthough there was no curriculum structure certain things were required and it seemed I was constantly just doing busy work that seemed to take away from me actually doing my job. I got discouraged and was offered the job I currently have which is rebuilding large diesel generator engines. I am also allowed to explore any creative avenues that I want. I love research and develoment and I am currently in the process of starting my own engine research and development shop to explore alternative fuel technologies in the power generation market. ( this is like a dream come true).

I worked full time in my family business for a total of 21 years.

After getting this job I realized some of my behavior "habits" that are not good are "habits" I acquired while working for my parents.
For example... when finally got a computer to handle sales invoicing and inventory management... I wanted to input every part we had in stock onto the computer so that it would be easy to sell, reorder etc... After spending almost a month inputting part numbers, description, and pricing in to the system... My dad got impatient... Did I mention earlier he was impatient... ( he gets frustrated with tasks that are time consuming and tells me I overcomplicate everything LOL) he told me I was spinning my wheels and that putting everything into the system was a waste of time and that he needed me to be on the counter waiting on the customers that came in the store needing parts. We did not see eye to eye on what we each felt was important....

I give all of this information to ask this question if I can word it correctly.

How many of you are 2nd generation ADHD'ers and do you feel like you received "bad" behavior therapy from your parents. Has there ever been a study to try to differentiate what "habits" are truly a result of the genetics of ADHD and which habits are a result of the environment of ADHD?

At the moment I feel that I am retraining some of my bad "habits" . Part of this is due to the ability of my desire to fix them and they are not being influenced by my parents/employers who I learned the bad habits from....