I have ADD, whether I like it or not, I have it. Along with depression and anxiety for good measure. I have spent the last two years doing very little, with a few undertakings that didn't stick. I realize after getting severely depressed, in January 2003, I was not going to run the flagpole with things the way I did in the past. Removing this behavior, not falling prey to the grandiosity and excitement of something new and big, I have in turn, not done much and of course, became depressed. Dumb as it may be, it only recently dawned on me that I only know how to do things in an ADD manner, if you will.

Since I refuse to do things as I have done them, I have done little, particularly in recent months. Now, I would like to have a life. So, I guess the question is, what are the first steps in treatment? I am on medication, which is not a panacea, but I believe I am more teachable and capable of taking steps, but I am without a teacher and don't what the steps are. I have searched for posts on how to begin, but have not found any, which may be my own fault. So I apologize if this is redundant.

What are the first steps? Make a list? Get Outlook? I'm really not sure but am eager to start. Your help, suggestions and thoughts are wholly appreciated.

I say the first step is reading everything you can about ADD, if you have the attention span for books. You can always flip through them and read parts of them if you can't read all of them. If you can't afford them, sit in the bookstore cafe and read them, then put them back, or take them out from the library.

I like Journey's Through ADDulthood, by Sari Solden and Delivered From Distraction, by Hallowell and Ratey.

Get good professional help. ADD Coaches, a good psychiatrist to help you with meds; a good psychologist to help you work through depression, guilt, shame, fear; maybe occupational therapy (I don't know much about that one).

Realize that the point is just to slow down and get organized enough to make your life workable. The object is not to become as hyper-organized and on-top-of-everything as your boring and tight-*** cousin. Realize that there are a lot of really loveable qualities that often go along with having ADD: quirkiness, zaniness, idealism, tenderheartedness, creativity, effervescence, energy, dynamism. Learn to love the many wonderful things about yourself, even those things that stem from ADD.

I think that a holistic approach is best. Realize that you will always have this brain, you will always be struggling to some extent with the difficulties of ADD. NOTHING WILL BE A PANACEA! A day planner, a computer program, Ritalin... none of these will solve your problems for you. Whatever you decide to do, it is only part of the solution. Also, this is a long-haul. Since there is no panacea, no quick fix, you will need support from others. If you have a partner, girlfriend, best friend, brother, or parent that can be supportive toward you, have them take on the role of being like your ADD partner, the person you talk with about the difficulties and the small successes, the person who encourages you and helps you reflect on where things went wrong. But don't pick your tight-*** cousin. You don't need someone belittling you for your messy bedroom; you don't need someone belittling you at all. You need someone who appreciates and enjoys you, even with your flaws and quirks, and who can chuckle with you over your stumbles and then help you get back up again.

Start start making positive changes in your life. I know you're in a rut and if you knew how to make some sweeping changes, you wouldn't be posting questions here at the post board, but I am talking about really little things. Do things that make you feel good. If you have people in your life who make you feel bad about yourself, don't associate with them anymore. Associate with people who like you, who make you feel good. If your creative, find a creative outlet. Don't feel bad if you start sculpting something and don't finish it, and just jump to the next painting, or jump to writing a song... just create for yourself if you have a creative drive. Volunteer if helping others makes you feel good. Take a walk in Central Park on a sunny day and reflect.

Just some starting suggestions... has this helped?

Thanks Flighty. I appreciate that. I am gathering information now and have a fair degree of knowledge on things, but that can be my downfall. I feel so upended and everything feels so random, meaning, I clean up my place and begin to do this or that only to end up in a rut within a day or two or three. I was wondering if there is a concrete beginning but I may be looking for a silver bullet again. I'm good at that. The bane of my existence stems from the fact that I have so much potentially on the plate but as soon as I think about it, I freeze up, get anxious, depressed and consequently seek escape in the form of isolating. Quite a pattern.

I think the second step after reading on ADD would be to think about what you would enjoy doing with your life and work towards that. Get a fun exciting job or something like that. Set a commen achivable goal such money etc. ect.

Hi dipwiz and welcome to the forums!

Way To Flighty has a lot of great points, but depression is a real problem that can make the best of plans and dreams come to nothing. I know, I have lived it. I don't know if you are on an anti-depressant, but after 5 months of treatment with just ritalin my psychiatrist put me on an anti-depressant. It has made a world of difference. It doesn't make me happy all the time. I still struggle very hard, but I am moving forward.

There are a lot of homeopathic options here, too, if you don't want to jump in at the doctors. Here are two, but there may be more. Check out our Nutrition Section, Misc. Treatments, if you are interested.

Hypericum Perforatum - called St John's Wort in Europe. It has been used for centuries to treat depression, anxiety and sleep disorders and is traditionally used as a restoring tonic for the nervous system and to lift the spirits. More recently, there have been a number of clinical studies that have demonstrated that standardized extracts of Hypericum are more effective than a placebo in the treatment of depression .Active ingredients include glycosides, flavonoids, volatile oils, tannins and resins. The active ingredients in Hypericum are thought to boost serotonin levels, which are usually lacking in depressed people. In some countries like Germany, the sale of St John's Wort has outstripped many of the major prescription anti-depressants.

Passiflora Incarnata - also called Passion Flower - is used as a sedative and for insomnia and can relieve anxiety and nervousness. Active ingredients include flavonoids, cyanogenic glycosides, alkaloids and saparin. Combined with Hypericum, it helps to calm and soothe, and is also thought to reduce high blood pressure and nervous tremors.


Just take one small step at a time. Hang in there and keep us posted.


Kim

Sounds like you are really hard on yourself. There are a lot of us out there who don't get much accomplished, who need help to cope, and who function better with medication. It's okay. It's great that you've acknowledged the things you're facing, and that things aren't working the way you've been doing them. Now you get to start anew. I agree that reading is a great place to start, but if you can't focus to read, try the medications first and some therapy if you choose. Then read all the books on ADD. I have found them to be uplifting, much more so than reading about things like depression, which often goes hand in hand with ADD. The books cover those things too, but it seems like it's more positive. Try not to beat yourself up. Most people go through hard times at one point or another, we just have to find resources and people who can support us. Good luck.

Thank you for the additional feedback, it is good to know that there are others who have been in and through extended slumps. You are right Jazz, reading about depression never helped my depression and statistics often tell a less than encouraging story.

I am in therapy by the way, and take lexapro, 20mg a day for depression along with 25 mg a day of adderall for the attentional stuff. I really don't know if the lexapro ever worked, I was given it in the midst of a severe bout of clinical depression, 2.5 years ago and that has certainly been slow going.

I want to make a fresh start, I really do and I will list my biggest fears, something I would imagine many of you will identify with; 1) I have a fear that lightning will strike again in the form of severe depression 2) I am afraid despite my continued learning and knowledge, I will just not execute, that is, just not do the things I am supposed to do (this fear has been realized) and 3) That I will put my best foot forward yet again, only to see things not work out as they have done in the past. I know I can live in this fear, but it is tough to deal with. I also tend to get extremely anxious when I start trying to get things in order and begin my life and in time, whether it be hours, days or weeks, I capitulate to this ongoing anxiety and general malaise, retreating into the safety of isolation.

I do not want another false start where I don't get anywhere and disappear on the relationships I have worked to cultivate. I have done all this before, innumerable times and it really sucks. Moreover, I also sit in fear of financial insecurity, don't have insurance and wonder how much longer I can pay for these meds and therapy, let alone my rent.

On a personal note, I was actually about to propose to my girlfriend of six years three months ago and she suddenly left me without any warning, reason or explanation literally a few weeks before I popped the question. To add insult to injury, my best friend of the last ten years, went into a full-blown drug-induced psychoses and broke into my apartment while I was sleeping and attacked me with a butcher knife. For the record, I do recognize the morbid humor in all of this, but needless to say, losing these two people under such sudden and unexpected circumstances has not been easy. I don't really know what is what, in terms of depression vs. add vs. anxiety vs. what I'm going through, although I never have, in truth. My entire life, like many of us, has been an ongoing struggle with abuse, isolation, sadness, underachieving and the gamut of difficulties. I want to thrive, not just survive anymore.

I would imagine I am hardly the first to be in this position and I would love to get just some sense of how to begin. I am tempted to make another list, but don't want to rot on my computer like the ones before.

Don't mean to rant, ramble and vent, but rather, I am trying to describe my situation and headset with some accuracy in the hopes of hearing more from you. I do appreciate your words to this point, they are helpful and thank you in advance for your continued feedback.

Dino