I apologize if someone's already adressed this formally--I'm just crunched for time at the moment and can't thumb through all the threads and posts and what-not.

Anyway, here's what I'm wondering:

Since I got on Dexedrine, my memory has improved. Significantly. Used to have a capacity of four hours and then info was just *pthh* gone.

My memory's improved, and overall, I'm better cognitively--I can analyze incoming data more effectively.
But meds for people with ADD are supposed to calm them down and help them focus without being distracted, right? Well, I haven't calmed down. (But then, I don't think hyperactivity was really of concern when we tried this ADD treatment in the first place.)

At first, I was on 5, and eventually raised to 35. (mg/spansules.)
My husband tracked it down and thinks that on 20 mg I was functioning the highest, he thinks. Before that, and after that, functioning was not as good. So now I've tapered a bit, which has helped, but I still have this nagging question, and it's picking at me to no end:

Why is this stuff not calming me down, like it's supposed to help ADDers do?
I'm calmer since we lowered the dose, yes--but calmer in general since the start of treatment? No. Memory's better, ability to analyze data is better, but definitely not calmer, and quite possibly distraction sets in easier (though I'm not sure on that one because it's connected to memory.) Maybe that makes no sense...I'll try again in case it doesn't:


When I think about distraction, here, I hearken back to the "come up with a slogan for the forum" contest, when Ian said something like "ADD Forums...where people come to--hey, look! String!"
Before treatment, metaphorical string was not a concern of mine...but now, I'm totally "Hey, look! String!"-esque.
As I said, memory retention is far better overall, and ability to analyze is better as well. This hyperactivity thing is my primary concern, I think.

...any theories on this? Similar experience?

Gotta go back to homework. (Putting the earplugs back in, lest external stimuli disturb me.)

Chrys

p.s. sorry about all the colors--someone said it made it easier for them to focus when stuff was a bit colorful. I think maybe it does for me.

Is hyperactivity really so bad? It sure beats lethargy. What's so wrong with having all the energy in the world -- if you can contain it?

I have to wonder if distraction sets in easier, or, if you're merely off task more often. Do you find yourself focusing on the same thing for a long time, it's just that it's the *wrong* thing?

For me I found that what dex definitely did is keep the task I'm currently focusing on from being about as predictable as the spin of a roulette wheel. Without it, I'd spend 5 minutes on work, 5 minutes on wikipedia, 5 minutes on livejournal, 5 minutes talking to my girlfriend, 5 minutes checking news sites... and so on. Now, with dex, those 5 minute blocks are often hour blocks. If I get "distracted" by something (recently ADD forums), I can't let go of it. It's not really an ADD problem - I'm quite focused, and other things don't easily pull me away from it. It's just that the focus is on the wrong thing.

Of course either way I'm not getting as much work done as I should be. But I think my original theory might be right - training yourself to properly use your focus is important.

I have certainly felt a hyped-up effect from medication, and medication encouraged hyperfocus is not at all rare. It can help you to get totally obsessed about something and not let go of it, though this could also be a sign of too high a dosage.

While my investigation into possible results of tolerance and other neurotransmitter-related stuff continues, I'd recommend for you the same thing I recommended in another thread -

Try the usual organizing stuff. Try setting alarms for yourself to check if you're on task. Try making schedules and following them. Try telling yourself - this is what I have to do be doing now. Make a list of what you're supposed to be doing. There's nothing you can possibly hurt by doing this, and you might find that it's what is missing from your current treatment. Certainly Driven to Distraction advocates this approach.

I also would ask how you're doing on side-effects. Have you been having problems (especially at higher dosees) with insomnia and/or anorexia (meaning a loss of appetite for any reason, not just because you are upset with your self-image)? I've often heard it said that the ideal dosage is a notch below the one where the side-effects start to be a problem. I don't know how much medical reality there is to this, but it seems reasonable that problems would start to develop when you'd gone too far.

Oh, yes, yes--I do hyperfocus, on tasks. Get obsessive as hell. Discussed that somewhere else. What I meant about distraction was...oh, crap, what'd I mean? I...man, I've been reading, and now I'm going "spatial memory--no wait--ADDF post!"

I meant--ok, reading, for example. If I can actually read what I'm trying to, I'll retain it now, whereas I couldn't before I got on Dex. But if, like, my husband walks through the room--even if it's fast and we don't exchange any words at all--I can lose where I was in a second.

He, however, can get so absorbed in a book that I literally have had to speak loudly--really loudly to get him to snap out of the trance, and once, when he had an ear infection, I had to stomp on the floor next to him like I used to with my friend's deaf dog who couldn't respond to anything except vibrations felt through the floor. (Weird but true.) He definitely does not have ADD.

I can't let go of a concept, no. I'll spend a rediculous amount of time doing something that could have been done in 10 minutes. I'll suddenly realize my butt is numb, look at the clock and realize it's been 5 hours since I sat down to research and I thought it'd only been 5 minutes. (And I'll have gotten all of, like, three PubMed articles printed out.)

Those are bad days, though--the main issue is that just the tiniest noises or seeing something out of the corner of my eye can make me completely lose track of what someone is saying or what the heck I just read.

Yeah, I set alarms and everything...

The hyperactivity...I don't know how to explain it. It's not really scary or anything, I don't mind it, but I was curious simply because of the fact that, well, most people are calmed down significantly by their meds, and obviously I'm not. Guess maybe I just wondered if I was totally messed up, or the meds were messed up, or if it was no big deal at all.

Am I making any sense? Sorry, I got distracted by ADDF too ;) Note that I banned myself on purpose for 2-3 weeks a very short time ago for school! (Didn't help much but it was worth a shot.)

Chrys

p.s. Ok, I'm sorry but that part up there at the top is funny as hell! LMAO! :p

hmm thats weird, maybe dexies aint the best med for you, who knows. The colours, they rocked dude. You aint messed up, c'mon, you know that. Well maybe you are, but everyone is to some extent and you seem to be messed up in the good way, can there be such a thing as good messed up, i guess so, just slightly nutty at times or whatever. Good luck sorting it out dude.

Messed up in a good way, slightly nutty at times... :p
you silly brit...if I truly disliked you and had like $2,000 sitting around I'd fly to .au just to kick your bum, boy!
(J/K and ya know it...after all, I hate packing...I'd fly you here to get your bum kicked just for the sake of convenience! Hahahahaha :D)
So, anyway, does it seem truly bad, though? I mean the hyperness? Maybe I don't really want the answer to that question.:rolleyes:
...BTW, who exactly do you think inspired the idea to stick some colors in there, huh? ;)
Good God, I'm tired, and it's almost dinnertime in .au! :faint: Lucky...(insert synonym for "Chrys at birth")! I need a smoke and some more Pop-Tarts...
Chrys
hmm thats weird, maybe dexies aint the best med for you, who knows. The colours, they rocked dude. You aint messed up, c'mon, you know that. Well maybe you are, but everyone is to some extent and you seem to be messed up in the good way, can there be such a thing as good messed up, i guess so, just slightly nutty at times or whatever. Good luck sorting it out dude.

well being hyper can cause me issues at time, miserable as sin and full of energy...:/ But for the most part its OK, just not when you got to study your a*s off.

True, true. I am very nearly done, though, remember. It's not nuts like it was there for a while.

Chrys