View Full Version : In the dark depths of depression


anonymouslyadd
01-16-16, 11:16 AM
I'm working for someone who is scary to work for. He's a micro manager but doesn't provide clear goals, which is something I desperately need. He doesn't provide expectations for anything. My manager would call me asking why I hadn't left for work at a certain time becaus the boss would watch when I left.

I've been sleeping a lot and have been pretty down. There will be an end to this but until then, I need some encouragement and advice. I'm sorry for all of my threads that seem to have a darker tone. I'm trying my best. :(

sarahsweets
01-16-16, 11:37 AM
I'm working for someone who is scary to work for. He's a micro manager but doesn't provide clear goals, which is something I desperately need. He doesn't provide expectations for anything.
These kind of people suck. The have expectations that you dont know about so you have no chance at meeting them!
My manager would call me asking why I hadn't left for work at a certain time becaus the boss would watch when I left.

Do you mean leave from home to go to work? Or leave work to go home?

I've been sleeping a lot and have been pretty down. There will be an end to this but until then, I need some encouragement and advice. I'm sorry for all of my threads that seem to have a darker tone. I'm trying my best. :(
Dont apologize. We are here for support. You deserve it as much as the next person. When you say there will be an end to this what do you mean? Do you mean the job will be over or you will be leaving? Or will the dick boss be moving on?
i suspect that the micromanagers of the world have some deep childhood issues where they grew up in some kind of out of control state as a child and havent grown up enough to deal with it. I always wondered if people like this had some sort of undiagnosed mental illness because of their inability to relate to their coworkers in an acceptable way. Even if you cant verbalize my mantra, internally tell him to go f**k himself.

Unmanagable
01-16-16, 11:40 AM
(((Hugs))) The depressive ditches feel like they'll never end. Glad you're reaching out.

Do as many nurturing things for self as you can. Make yourself do it, but don't talk down to yourself.

Be mindful of what you are saying to yourself and flip the script if it's anything other than loving kindness.

Breathe deeply on purpose often and pay attention to your body tension.

Sleep restores health in many ways, so let it happen.

Eat as healthily as you can. Foods alter our moods and bodily responses a great deal.

Once you make it to the other side, I'd try like heck to find another job and kick my self-care game up a few notches each day to build more cushion to land on for the next stressful encounter with them.

anonymouslyadd
01-16-16, 11:49 AM
Do you mean leave from home to go to work? Or leave work to go home?
Sadly none of the above. I live in a studio apartment on his property. He's given me a great deal on staying with him. I don't pay any rent.
When you say there will be an end to this what do you mean? Do you mean the job will be over or you will be leaving? Or will the dick boss be moving on?
The job will be over. It's a temporary position. It's an incredible opportunity for me, but it's hard to see that opportunity in lieu of the other circumstances.

He's a cynic and admits to having OCD.

midnightstar
01-16-16, 12:16 PM
It's fine anon, we're all here for you :grouphug: People like that drive me round the bend, will you be able to find a new job soon? :grouphug:

Are you seeing anyone for depression at the moment? Might be a good idea if you can :grouphug:

Lunacie
01-16-16, 12:47 PM
:yes: to what SuperStar wrote!

What are you doing to take care of yourself?

Eat well, sleep well, get some fresh air and exercise, browse the aisles of a store just to be around other people, say hello to a stranger, watch a funny movie, eat breakfast with a friend, remember to do some conscious breathing several times a day, and cut yourself some slack.

Have you seen a doctor? Taking antidepressants? Doing talk therapy?

You are worthy of taking care of yourself and feeling better! :grouphug:

anonymouslyadd
01-16-16, 03:01 PM
It's fine anon, we're all here for you :grouphug: People like that drive me round the bend, will you be able to find a new job soon? :grouphug:

Are you seeing anyone for depression at the moment? Might be a good idea if you can :grouphug:
Thank you. :grouphug:

I'm not seeing a therapist now. I'm actually not looking forward to seeing another therapist again, considering how draining the whole process is.

anonymouslyadd
01-21-16, 10:26 PM
I'm battling and trying to find meaning in the struggle. I slept a lot today, way too much. I felt better afterwards, but I need to be working more. I need to find that work/life balance thing.

anonymouslyadd
02-19-16, 12:29 AM
Please think about me or pray or whatever. I'm really struggling.

InformedPill
02-19-16, 01:38 AM
I'm sorry to hear about your situation. Having been through the same type of ordeal, I know how stressful this can be for you. Reminiscing on my situation, I still remember how slowly time would drag on getting through a shift, and how it was hard to communicate and vent with other colleagues because they seemed to have a hard time handling their own misery and worrying about making the micro manager happy. It is a no win situation, and in the end, the best thing that happened was being let go. I recommend looking at this experience as just a stepping stone to a better opportunity, which you should start looking for. One good thing that will come out of the situation is that you will value your next job much more, as well as knowing the warning signs of a bad manager.

Lloyd_
02-19-16, 02:30 AM
I'm working for someone who is scary to work for. He's a micro manager but doesn't provide clear goals, which is something I desperately need. He doesn't provide expectations for anything. My manager would call me asking why I hadn't left for work at a certain time becaus the boss would watch when I left.

I've been sleeping a lot and have been pretty down. There will be an end to this but until then, I need some encouragement and advice. I'm sorry for all of my threads that seem to have a darker tone. I'm trying my best. :(

Have you been in your particular career field for awhile? Maybe you should not only just look for another job, but a new career. Many of us have found or currently trying to find the right career which best fits according to our personality traits, both the good and bad.

Sometimes sleeping it off is the best cure for depression, but remember to not sweat the small stuff at times like these and enjoy the little things in life that make you happy my friend. :)

midnightstar
02-19-16, 05:48 AM
(((anon))) I'm thinking of you my friend :grouphug:

Lunacie
02-19-16, 11:00 AM
:grouphug: anon :grouphug:

I've missed seeing your posts around here. I hope you can get this sorted and find a way out of that deep dark hole. There are friends up here who want to see you again, up here in the light.

stef
02-19-16, 11:08 AM
Thinking of you!:grouphug:

ginniebean
02-19-16, 12:09 PM
Micromanagement and intense scrutiny are harassment and there are documented health side effects like depression and anxiety. Anon, get out as fast as you can. ((hugs))

anonymouslyadd
02-19-16, 08:45 PM
I love you guys! Thanks for being there for me.

:grouphug: