View Full Version : anyone in or been in therapy?


NateDEEzy
01-31-16, 02:43 PM
Has anyone gone to therapy? If so, how much did it help? Has anyone experienced a full recovery from anxiety, or at least to the point where it doesn't control their life? I ask bc currently anxiety controls my entire life. Even though each day I feel like a dark cloud hands over me, I know that a beautiful life of happiness and excitement is possible and I want to make a change and realize that possibility. And i know that the road I'm on now isn't working for me.

dvdnvwls
01-31-16, 05:02 PM
My experience in therapy was mildly helpful in small ways, but ultimately disappointing. I saw several different therapists for varying lengths of time, but all of them had a real chance to get to know me, and I was open with each of them about everything that was going on.

The "missing link" was that at the time I didn't know I had ADHD. After hearing everything about me and being fully aware of what was going on in my life, not one of those therapists ever hinted that maybe I had ADHD. Maybe they had never heard of it. Maybe they were waiting for me to find out. (??) At least one of them was a brilliant mind, a respected and popular professor who trained other therapists. The others were certainly no slouches either. But in the end, they didn't get it.

I think it is absolutely essential that in finding a therapist you find someone who has long experience and success with clients who have ADHD.

acdc01
01-31-16, 05:11 PM
Are you on medication? I've never had anxiety myself but my mom has it. She went to about 3 therapists and ultimately, not one helped. I'm not saying don't try. I think anything is worth trying.

But medication, well she's so much better. Side Effects can suck sometimes though to the point you might end up wanting to stop.

dvdnvwls
01-31-16, 05:16 PM
I may have misunderstood...

If you're talking about "anxiety, but no ADHD", then I think the average therapist has a better chance with you than they did with me. There are different therapeutic approaches that can be used with anxiety. Some of those approaches may work better for you than other ones. It's just my opinion that it depends on your personality what kind of therapy might work best.

sarahsweets
02-01-16, 03:18 AM
The therapy I was in wasnt for adhd. It had to do with childhood crap and bipolar stuff.

aeon
02-01-16, 05:03 AM
Yep, Iíve gone to therapists. Did they help me? Nope.

When I give a therapist my backstory so they have some idea where I are coming from and
I see them become wide-eyed and shrink back in their chair, I know right then and there
they are worthless to me. If they canít maintain a modicum of professional presentation, then
forget it.

I mean, they are human, I get that. But I know if they are having a visceral reaction
over which they have no control, they are likely no longer present in terms of mindfulness,
so what am I to do, reassure them and tell them that everything is OK?

For those who remained calm, collected, and present, they fell into three groups. First, those
who said nothing. Second, those who offered Hallmark-card sympathy. Third, those who
after hearing me tell them how I felt about something would ask ďhow do you feel about that?Ē
like some kind of automaton.

Even when I would look for a therapist who said they specialized in trauma, depression,
and anxiety, they never had anything to offer me that I didnít know already.

I wanted to find someone who would hear my thoughts, find the BS, call me on it in a
constructive way, and give me some tools and resources.

To be fair, I once had a therapist tell me on the third meeting with them that therapy was
not what I needed, but medication. I asked why and they said that my problems werenít
because of they way I thought but because of the way I was wired.

I mean, I know that ultimately I have to help myself, but some guidance would be welcome.

I would sometimes have this fantasy that I would get a therapist who was leagues smarter
than me, and they would hear my story and stuff, and laugh and then tell me all the ways
I was wrong in my thinking, and they would show me the (relative) truth I could not see.
I mean, I know thatís infantile, but I didnít like feeling as if I was more clever than
they were, even if they had the degrees and I didnít.

Donít get me wrong, I think therapy can be a great help to people, and I have nothing
against it, even if it has never been of any help to me.

-----

Once I was suicidal with a plan, and I felt distressed enough about that to call a suicide hotline.

So I am talking to the guy about I donít remember what, and in the middle of it he
interrupts me and screams at me:

ďWould you stop being so **cking abstract?!Ē

I was stunned for a few seconds, but it was the right thing to do because it brought me back to
some semblance of presence/reality instead of my detachment.

At which point he gave me a couple of tools, things I had never heard before, and they
made sense to me...and I have never forgotten them, and they work (for me) in terms of
relieving depressive thoughts.

So getting yelled at by a suicide hotline operator is the best therapy I have ever had, bar none.

Which is weird to say, but it is my truth.


Cheers,
Ian

Unmanagable
02-01-16, 09:29 AM
I wasn't helped by any of the ones my insurance approved, sans the one who initially suggested adhd, but have been helped tremendously by a free counseling service provided by a local shelter for sexual and domestic abuse victims.

All the other therapists missed the simple and obvious fact that abuse has lasting lifelong effects and skipped straight to discussing only the depression scene. I'll never understand that, and I'm deeply saddened for the other people who endured these folks.

Having a place I know I can go to share the deepest feelings I often endure alone in my mind, without judgement or being looked at and responded to as if I'm nuts, is priceless.

It helps me maintain my peace of mind in a huge way and I'm so damn glad I didn't allow my other hellish experiences in seeking help to keep me from ever seeking it again.

aeon
02-01-16, 10:09 AM
All the other therapists missed the simple and obvious fact that abuse has lasting lifelong effects and skipped straight to discussing only the depression scene. I'll never understand that, and I'm deeply saddened for the other people who endured these folks.
:doh:

Having a place I know I can go to share the deepest feelings I often endure alone in my mind, without judgement or being looked at and responded to as if I'm nuts, is priceless.
:yes:


Cheers,
Ian

dvdnvwls
02-01-16, 02:39 PM
I wanted to find someone who would hear my thoughts, find the BS, call me on it in a
constructive way, and give me some tools and resources.

To be fair, I once had a therapist tell me on the third meeting with them that therapy was
not what I needed, but medication. I asked why and they said that my problems weren’t
because of they way I thought but because of the way I was wired.

I mean, I know that ultimately I have to help myself, but some guidance would be welcome.

I would sometimes have this fantasy that I would get a therapist who was leagues smarter
than me, and they would hear my story and stuff, and laugh and then tell me all the ways
I was wrong in my thinking, and they would show me the (relative) truth I could not see.
I mean, I know that’s infantile, but I didn’t like feeling as if I was more clever than
they were, even if they had the degrees and I didn’t.
Sounds to me like you independently invented an idealized version of CBT. :)

Or something like that, anyway.

qanda
02-01-16, 08:19 PM
My daughter is in therapy for anxiety. She is also on Zoloft, so hard to say if it's the therapy, Zoloft, or both. We've seen many therapists, but this one I like the best. She tells my daughter to ground herself, be mindful, and practice, practice, practice. But we are dealing with a 14 yr old, so her lack of motivation and teenage personality makes it hard. as she does not practice nearly as much as I would like to see.

Fionagrape
02-04-16, 04:00 PM
Asking for therapy is hard, because you have to ask the right way, and then if your doctors medical staff doesn't follow through, you have to keep asking, and wait and wait to finally get to see a therapist.
there are helpful therapists and not so helpful ones. It's easy to think your therapist is not helping you, or not understanding you. Sometimes I have to work out what we talked about long after the session, and then after I'm done being angry or disagreeing with them, I realize it was somewhat helpful.
I have the problem of not understanding the system, I meet for a few sessions with a counselor and then they say, "OK our sessions have now come to an end." It seems my insurance only covers therapy for certain reasons, so you get five sessions for social anxiety, or two months for severe depression.
I don't know why medical insurance doesn't cover ongoing cognitive therapy for people with ADHD. Do they think that a specialist would be too expensive? There isn't a need? We need to push for these things because we are not getting the care we need, that's my experience with this system.

Sunlovinlady
02-09-16, 05:51 PM
I have tried therapy several times but I still have not found one that fits me. I even went to the last one specifically for ADHD with the mindset that I did not want to take medication. So what does she do, get me to try medication for the first time in my life and it was horrible. She was also ADHD herself so she could relate, which was great but she couldn't focus enough to really hear me and help me. I also couldn't afford it after a while. So here I am back to doing what I can on my own. I've found little things that work for me over the years including things for anxiety and restlessness without meds. I don't like what they do to me, mentally or physically.

If you do seek a therapist, be picky about it. Don't settle. Make sure that they actually listen to you and give you good advice.

Jiberish
04-24-16, 11:53 PM
I am currently seeing a therapist. I have seen them in the past as well. I have found that therapists are like running shoes. It has to be a good fit, or else you do not go anywhere fast. My current therapist has really helped me, including finding out I had ADHD. I also have Anxiety Disorder, I have to get a spinal fusion here soon and my work is screwing me on workmans comp. So its safe to say im under some stress.

He has helped me overcome a racing mind, encouraged me to just let go sometimes of the things I cannot change (like my work).

All in all, if you think of ADHD or another disorder with it, you create a tool box to help you through it. A therapist is just another tool in it. If you have a way of getting one through an Employee Assistance program do it. If its crazy expensive.....thats up to you. But I wish I had these in college more, or should I say I wish I utilized it more. hahaha.

I think if its available, the worst that can happen is it sucks. But keep in mind, Ive had some bad therapists too, just need that good shoe to fit .

Hope this helps