View Full Version : Masking Depression with unconscious lies?

03-01-16, 10:47 PM
Can Depression be masked by the lies that you unconsciously tell yourself to feel better?

I have been thinking about this.

I'm hiding my depression and say "I can't be depressed" because of my inner voice is betraying me and saying "Noo, no of course're not depressed, only weak people are depressed"...and I believe it.

I then tell people and doctors that I'm not depressed.

03-02-16, 11:38 AM
Can depression be a very inner thing and not be put on display for everyone to see?

Little Missy
03-02-16, 01:10 PM
Can depression be a very inner thing and not be put on display for everyone to see?

I believe it can be.

03-02-16, 01:29 PM
I'm sure it is. I doubt that except for my husband anyone ever caught on that I was depressed in any way. It's so easy to hide..especially for a few hours at work.

I can also relate to lying to myself about depression. A few months ago when I was pretty depressed I just didn't want to acknowledge it not even to myself. I kept telling myself that I'm just tired and ill but looking back I'm pretty sure that I was fairly depressed as well. I guess, the main reason why I didn't want to acknowledge it was because I didn't want to do anything about it. I didn't want treatment. I didn't even want to see my psychiatrists. I kept thinking that I'll contact them if I don't feel better or if I get worse or once I know that I'm really depressed.

03-02-16, 03:14 PM
Next time I see my Psych I will talk to them about being depressed, maybe depression is the main issue vs ADHD for me.

03-10-16, 02:30 AM
Yes, it can be so "easy" to hide it. I believe that it makes it worse in the long run since it stays longer since we don't get the help we need soon enough.

03-10-16, 04:43 PM
I was recently diagnosed with depression when I saw a new psychiatrist to talk about my ADHD. She convinced me to add Wellbutrin to my daily Adderall but she only convinced me to take an anti-depressant by saying Wellbutrin was also used to treat ADHD as an off label use. For a couple months I told myself I wasn't depressed and that I had been depressed before and I knew what depression felt like and I didn't feel like that now. I asked people close to me if they thought I was depressed everyone said no, even my fiance didn't think so.

Yet, I'm coming to realize that not all depression feels the same, it doesn't look the same every time. I do think I'm depressed, I haven't yet found a drug combo that has helped but I think the first step is admitting yeah, I might need more help than I initially thought.

And who knows if my ADHD is causing the depression? Life can be very difficult with ADHD and we all know how the daily and hourly struggle can exhaust and deplete you of energy and emotion.

03-14-16, 10:10 PM
Sometimes I deny that I'm depressed for the very specific reason that I find it DEPRESSING! Does that make sense?

After many years, I've become so sick of "talking about it" and getting "treatment" for it and seeking "intervention" for it. Yet it stubbornly remains. I can actually get depressed about about being depressed simply because of how long I've felt like this.

03-14-16, 11:14 PM
Can depression be a very inner thing and not be put on display for everyone to see?

I believe this is possible to some degree.

It cannot be completely hidden though, or at least that is my sense. A-game clinicians will sometimes be able to discern it despite your best efforts to remain under the radar.

I tend to think that is a good thing.


03-15-16, 04:20 AM
I think it can be hidden because we are taught that we should just "suck it up" or that we have no reason to be depressed. Or we are taught that we shouldnt be depressed because so-and-so has something horrible going on and "they arent depressed so why should you be?"
Almost like the imbalance hat I suffer isnt as important as someone else so I hide it because I feel ashamed.
I dont think Im making sense but hopefully someone gets what I mean.

03-15-16, 04:27 AM
To a certain degree, yes. And then it's exhausting because you feel you have to "pretend to be ok" because others dont understand (even if they mean well).

My mom though was hospatalized twice for severe clinical depression. I never saw this because the first time I was too little and the second time I was already living here.
One summer though she was slipping back and was apathetic. fortunately her GP caught it as it got worse (at a routine physical) and then she was on antidepressants for the rest of her life. she was her cheery, usual, annoying self the next time I saw her!

03-15-16, 08:55 AM
I think I do something similar with my own impairments.

I think its a personality type and I've always been kind of stoic.

Just like its possible for some people to over indulge their impairments, it makes sense that other people would be on the opposite side of the spectrum (ie, denying their impairments).

03-15-16, 09:39 AM
I was depressed for a very long time until I took Wellbutrin a few years ago.