View Full Version : Why always need others to agree ?


Gilthranon
03-18-16, 02:49 AM
An acquaintance is in a brothel, to my disagreement, but I'm not her father nor there to tell her what to do. My only place is to support if I can or back off. Not that she needs any (or does she ? lol she's in a brothel for christs sake :p) She does it for fair reason, something a friend of hers doesn't agree with and tells his opinion often, which leads me to suggest him to stop. She's an intelligent grown up adult, albeit younger, but he is not her protégé and it can be very pushing.

Met a girl some years back and at the cost of her parents money traveled the world. I asked her if she was okay with it and she was. I strongly disliked her ways, but told her if she liked what she did and accepted the consequences, don't let anyone tell you any different.

I think it isn't wise to need to advise to change their ways, just because one thinks vastly different about it. No matter how different. Is it our ego ? I'm talking not about murder or anything obviously wrong.

PS - don't get me wrong, I'm a foolish hypocrite, just thinking about this

sarahsweets
03-18-16, 04:23 AM
I think it depends on how strongly someone feels about an issue and if there is danger involved and if you have personal experience with it. Like, I am an alcoholic. When I hear of people binge drinking or see someone who binge drinks as if they are invincible, I feel like I have to share with them the dangers and how things are for me. The difference and harder thing to do, is know when to stop. I can share all I want but once I get that out od my system, I need to leave it alone. The person knows how I feel and they would have told me how they were choosing to drink anyway and I have to let it go.
I have to remember that not everyone is like me, and I dont run the show.
When there is a safety issue involved its harder for me to back off but Im working on it.

SB_UK
03-18-16, 05:09 AM
Best to work towards a world where de facto - 'poor' choices (which harm the other) cannot be made.

A world without the profit motive would be a world without cigarettes, drugs, alcoholism ... ... and the rest.

Unmanagable
03-18-16, 08:28 AM
There were times in my younger days I did things for money that no one could have ever talked me out of.

I had no home, no stability whatsoever, several addictions, was being actively abused in my intimate relationships because I thought I deserved it, and was simply trying to survive.

I had also never been taught how to healthily address any of those things or how to even begin to healthily exist within myself.

My struggles were chalked up by most to me not being good enough, not smart enough to know better, just not trying hard enough, etc. and I was out to prove to myself that I could acquire everything I needed my damn self, no matter how I had to go about it.

So lucky to have lived through it all and eventually met a dear friend who taught me just how incredible self-love is and how worth it I was to invest more time in it.

Grateful for the ones who recognized me on a heart level instead of automatically passing harsh judgements.

SB_UK
03-18-16, 03:06 PM
This basic subject comes up over and over.

Do we ban addictive and damaging thing ?

Or change society so addictive and damaging thing no longer appeals ?

eg rat park

The only workable answer is ii) and society (legal systems) operate over i)

In this current world - the root cause isn't tackled so the addictive propensity just moves onto something new - and similarly bad for its health.

SB_UK
03-18-16, 03:10 PM
'how he treats his inferiors'
I think that we'll find that if an individual considers others his inferior - then there may well be significant problems which must be addressed.

Is Einstein inferior to an average Indian kid at speaking an Indian language ?

What does inferior mean ?

Poorer ?

In which case we're stating that the rich are superior to the poor ? where I'd argue that the principled poor are much more moral than the average rich - in that the pursuit of wealth is an immoral addiction in itself.

Fergie
05-20-16, 07:06 PM
Best to work towards a world where de facto - 'poor' choices (which harm the other) cannot be made.

A world without the profit motive would be a world without cigarettes, drugs, alcoholism ... ... and the rest.

Disagree with passion. remember those poor kids in Kansas who used to try getting high by sniffing manure?

It's not somebody's greed for profit that makes somebody else want a drink. If you don't sell alcohol, people will make their own. And they have.

If you ban and criminalize prostitution, people will still find ways. Allegedly, Victorian England had highest numbers of prostitutes per population.

Think about the kind of world you are actually proposing for everybody? I mean sure, when we are all confined to padded environments, and force fed what the kind doctors feel is good for us, we will all be safe! You know, there actually were these women - called themselves Our Lady of the Apple- who volunteered around hospitals, feeding patients apples. One a day. Those who refused to eat, were force fed. every *******' day. NO THANK YOU.

SB_UK
05-21-16, 02:27 AM
Disagree with passion. remember those poor kids in Kansas who used to try getting high by sniffing manure?

It's not somebody's greed for profit that makes somebody else want a drink. If you don't sell alcohol, people will make their own. And they have.

If you ban and criminalize prostitution, people will still find ways. Allegedly, Victorian England had highest numbers of prostitutes per population.

Think about the kind of world you are actually proposing for everybody? I mean sure, when we are all confined to padded environments, and force fed what the kind doctors feel is good for us, we will all be safe! You know, there actually were these women - called themselves Our Lady of the Apple- who volunteered around hospitals, feeding patients apples. One a day. Those who refused to eat, were force fed. every *******' day. NO THANK YOU.


In note form to make it simple for even a child to understand
Rat Park Experiment
1. Adverse Social environment
2. Drug Take
3. Benign Social environment
4. Choose not to take drug

VERY simply

1. Adverse Social environment (inequality) - removed
=
3. Benign Social environment
4. Choose not to take drug whether profit--motivated (cigarettes, alcohol or illicit/pharmaceutical drugs)
or
manure glue krokodil homebrew

Nobody said criminalize - don't make things up.
Nobody said force-feed people food - don't make things up.

-*-

Points of clarification (which even a child should be able to understand)
1. If all people have their needs met - then there's no underlying drive to prostitution - it's completely PREVENTED.
2.It is a world of greed which drives others to drink - that's the entire point of this idea - the adverse social environment within which people are immersed - see above.
3. No people won't make their own alcohol if the underlying drive to drown their distress away is OVERCOME - see above.
4. Ban/Criminalize prostitution - see above with special note to the idea that I'm more looking at the elimination of 'banning' / 'legal systems' / political systems.
5. Don't tell me what the world I'm proposing for people when you clearly don't understand it.
6. Mental health issues - must be PREVENTED not 'cured' is my stance.
7. 'What doctors say is good for us' - my general stance, like Hippocrates is 'PREVENTION' - I see no future for the medical doctor - and if there're any medical doctors out there with a conscience - then they'll know that a world without disease is what they (also) should be aspiring towards.
8. It's reassuring to know that you don't want to be force-fed - thanks for that information - it'd be interesting to find anybody who'd like to be force-fed. Think economy of words.

SB_UK
05-21-16, 02:54 AM
1. Adverse Social environment (inequality) - removed
=
3. Benign Social environment


today's news story

Individuals who feel a strong sense of belonging to social groups are much happier people, according to new research by psychologists.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/good-news/2016/05/21/whats-the-secret-to-happiness-scientists-may-have-found-the-answ/

Summary suitable for the average 5 year old child (colour-coded to make it accessible to 3 year olds)

IF 'happy' NOT 'take drugs'
IF 'unhappy' DO 'take drugs'

Little Missy
05-21-16, 07:00 AM
In note form to make it simple for even a child to understand
Rat Park Experiment
1. Adverse Social environment
2. Drug Take
3. Benign Social environment
4. Choose not to take drug

VERY simply

1. Adverse Social environment (inequality) - removed
=
3. Benign Social environment
4. Choose not to take drug whether profit--motivated (cigarettes, alcohol or illicit/pharmaceutical drugs)
or
manure glue krokodil homebrew

Nobody said criminalize - don't make things up.
Nobody said force-feed people food - don't make things up.

-*-

Points of clarification (which even a child should be able to understand)
1. If all people have their needs met - then there's no underlying drive to prostitution - it's completely PREVENTED.
2.It is a world of greed which drives others to drink - that's the entire point of this idea - the adverse social environment within which people are immersed - see above.
3. No people won't make their own alcohol if the underlying drive to drown their distress away is OVERCOME - see above.
4. Ban/Criminalize prostitution - see above with special note to the idea that I'm more looking at the elimination of 'banning' / 'legal systems' / political systems.
5. Don't tell me what the world I'm proposing for people when you clearly don't understand it - your presumptuousness is embarrassing.
6. Mental health issues - must be PREVENTED not 'cured' is my stance.
7. 'What doctors say is good for us' - my general stance, like Hippocrates is 'PREVENTION' - I see no future for the medical doctor - and if there're any medical doctors out there with a conscience - then they'll know that a world without disease is what they (also) should be aspiring towards.
8. It's reassuring to know that you don't want to be force-fed - thanks for that information - it'd be interesting to find anybody who'd like to be force-fed. Think economy of words.


Why do you always need others to agree?