View Full Version : Difficulty finding someone...


BasX88
04-05-16, 04:08 PM
I was recently diagnosed with ADD. I always thought it was ridiculous but after doing some research I have no doubt I have A LOT of the symptoms. I never thought I did because I would always end up being able to complete my tasks and concentrate on things, but I realized that's because I always wait until the last minute and just hyperfocus.

Anyway, it would explain a lot about my relationships as well. I tend to have a lot of 'flings', but few long term relationships (although I've had one 3 year relationship, but other than that nothing more than 6-8 months). I often get bored and get the typical ADD symptoms that make me seem a lot more self-centered than I really am (talk a lot about things I find interesting, always look for something fun to do, get distracted easily, can sometimes make comments that are atypical, maybe drink too much...). I'm also very intelligent so the conversation often just goes above their head if they are not on my 'level'. So either through my own boredom or the person I'm seeing believing I'm not 'right', I end up having to find someone else. I probably date someone new twice a month (give or take). Even when I find someone I really like and don't get bored, things don't usually work out.

Is this typical or am I seriously broken at the core? I've been told I'm very good looking, I hold a good job, have good prospects, don't worry about money (currently anyway), so something just screams out personality. If this is rather 'normal' for ADD, how do you deal with this and does anyone have any suggestions? I'm 27 with a prospective career (thank god the bank lets me work from home with flexible hours) and although I'm having a lot of fun (mostly), I would like to materialize a relationship that's gonna last more than a few weeks or a month..

Pilgrim
04-06-16, 06:01 AM
This is just my experience. I can relate to the lot of flings and romance that becomes unfulfilled. I also know about a relationship or two that never goes past go.
I've not found the answer but I have an idea. That ability to connect, I think it's a certain skill. I'm working on it.

KarmanMonkey
04-06-16, 03:02 PM
My 2 cents, is it's much better to be happy and single than miserable and in a relationship. I was lucky to find a person who is brilliant, understanding, patient, and gets me. I found her when I stopped looking and focussed on working on myself and my own happiness.