Okay guys,
I'm not good with the opposite sex. Not that I need to be hitting on anyone since I'm married. But I thought I would share some of the worst things I've said to women in bars and at parties.

1. Hi. You are a girl.
2. Haven't I met you someplace again?
3. What's your uh... uh... you know, the starry thing with lines?
4. You look hot, but not in a sweaty way.
5. That accent sounds American.
6. You realize that we all share DNA so we're related.... Right?
7. You look good like pizza.
8. Margeret Thatcher has nothing on you baby.
9. How long did it take to dye those roots black?
10. Those clothes look itchy

If you've done worse let's hear it.

MB

I know nothing! :P

you look like you lost a ton of weight

I think that could work with someone who has lost a lot of weight, but not with someone who hasn't.

I've been in both positions. :D :D

My pick up line:


Smile, look.... get a smile back... wait for them to talk to me.

Never works, lol!


I am working on this one: always get her e-mail/phone number because they do not call/e-mail if you give yours out...oh well.

I give up :)

you look like you lost a ton of weight

Not kidding, some woman at work told me that LAST FRIDAY.

pick up lines vary by the woman ,subtle teasing usually works to get the convo going then I clam up because I suck at small talk

Hi, I'm Dave

Hi, I'm Dave

Now that would get my attention. Simple is often the best route otherwise our "super player alert" kicks into high gear.

:eek: I'm sorry guys I just noticed this is the mens section, I'm multi tasking and apparantly not doing a very well job of it today. forget my advice. :faint:

quietly slinking out of the room with my tail between my legs,
Cherity

O' no the urge has overtaken me to remind you pick up lines are not just things men screw up. I once walked up to a total hunk at a frat party and asked "can I keep you?" And then noticed his very lovely girlfriend attached to his arm. :eek:

Ok now I"m slinking away quietly with my tail tucked between my legs

NO! You may NOT slink away until we have taunted you severely with our maleness...


oh wait?? Women have pickup lines ?


Someone give me a quarter because I need to buy a clue...

My favorite disasterous pickup lines are: "nice shoes..." or maybe "nice shirt", or "why does your hair look funny?" or "are those real ?" :faint:


Me :D




O' no the urge has overtaken me to remind you pick up lines are not just things men screw up. I once walked up to a total hunk at a frat party and asked "can I keep you?" And then noticed his very lovely girlfriend attached to his arm. :eek:

Ok now I"m slinking away quietly with my tail tucked between my legs

Ok, this was back in the late 70's and this wasn't a pickup line that I screwed up....just a generally ADD driven response.

I was hitting on this sales woman who had a little bit of an accent that I didn't recognize. This woman looked like a cross between Catherine Zeta-Jones and Jennifer Anniston.
Her name was Natasha. I asked her where she was from and she said Russia. So I said the first thing that popped into my head "Really? You don't LOOK Russian."
Let's just say I couldn't have had gotten a less positive response if I had the words "I'm stupid" tatooed on my forehead.

NO! You may NOT slink away until we have taunted you severely with our maleness... :rolleyes: O' now theres something I've never experianced before. lol Should I warn you I give as good as I get? With 4 brothers and 2 fathers, 2 sons and a husband I've learned to be quick on my feet with the comebacks. :D


oh wait?? Women have pickup lines ?Of course!!!! How do you think I landed my husband though its rather dirty and shouldn't be mentioned in polite company. :p


Someone give me a quarter because I need to buy a clue...

My favorite disasterous pickup lines are: "nice shoes..." or maybe "nice shirt", or "why does your hair look funny?" or "are those real ?" :faint:"Are those real?" I would definatly drop that one unless your aiming for a good slap. But, just so you know for future reference...Yes indeedy they are. ;)


Me :D

Women in fact use a lot of lines men generally use. I love your hair, have you lost weight (is used but should never ever be attempted unless the fact is true), wow what big muscles you have *drools*, can I take you home? Yep, we got them and we fail miserably just as much as men unless of course your me. lmbo

Ok, this was back in the late 70's and this wasn't a pickup line that I screwed up....just a generally ADD driven response.

I was hitting on this sales woman who had a little bit of an accent that I didn't recognize. This woman looked like a cross between Catherine Zeta-Jones and Jennifer Anniston.
Her name was Natasha. I asked her where she was from and she said Russia. So I said the first thing that popped into my head "Really? You don't LOOK Russian."
Let's just say I couldn't have had gotten a less positive response if I had the words "I'm stupid" tatooed on my forehead.

You could have said something along the lines of "OMG your beauty has me so flustered what I meant was your accent has a Russian lilt to it" Women like knowing their beauty flusters a man. ;)

Ok slinking back out and stop calling me back in here or a mod will severely punish me. :D ;)

You could have said something along the lines of "OMG your beauty has me so flustered what I meant was your accent has a Russian lilt to it" Women like knowing their beauty flusters a man. ;)

Ok slinking back out and stop calling me back in here or a mod will severely punish me. :D ;)
Yeah, if ONLY I could think that fast on my feet when I'm flustered by a woman.
I could have used those words of wisdom in the park yesterday when I was yet again flustered by a woman's beauty.
I've learned to not say the first thing that pops into my head....which in this instance was..."Hi"...
So, I'm still finding a happy medium between sounding stupid and looking stupid! :D

"nice shoes..."
Well see that is rather a nice thing to say I think (huge shoe collection).

TIP: If a woman has pretty shoes on, they are meant to be noticed.

I once attracted a nice man by wearing a new pair of black and white lizard skin Dan Post cowboy boots. Yessiree. It was a lovely conversation starter indeed. ;) :D

HaHA! Well, whatever works , works. :D

Me

Well see that is rather a nice thing to say I think (huge shoe collection).

TIP: If a woman has pretty shoes on, they are meant to be noticed.

I once attracted a nice man by wearing a new pair of black and white lizard skin Dan Post cowboy boots. Yessiree. It was a lovely conversation starter indeed. ;) :D

Hi, I'm Dave


[QUOTE=Nucking_Futs]Now that would get my attention. Simple is often the best route otherwise our "super player alert" kicks into high gear.


Then it's settled. If I am ever in a position again where I need to pick up a woman I'm going to do what Dave does. Walk up and say:
"Hi, I'm Dave."

:D

Make me pround and don't say Daaaa with your tong hanging out LOL

Russian girls, "Drul" A very good friend of mine who is one ot the top Photographers in the country married a Russian girl. And I have told her that she is probably the most "Gorgeous" girl I have ever meet , we are great friends. LOL

LOL yer silly :p :)

Then it's settled. If I am ever in a position again where I need to pick up a woman I'm going to do what Dave does. Walk up and say:
"Hi, I'm Dave."

:D

Then it's settled. If I am ever in a position again where I need to pick up a woman I'm going to do what Dave does. Walk up and say:
"Hi, I'm Dave."

:D

I'm feeling a little bit mocked here. :(

So, I will get my revenge by offering you some great advice *giggles*

How about the next time you run into a woman you'd like to get to know better you just yell out across the room "Hey, baby I wanna take your tempeture" and let me know how that goes. :p

Did you hear me Futs ! LOL

Did you hear me Futs ! LOL

Loud and clear :o

You really should read your pm's. lmbo

I try to keep up with them LOL, thanks for the reminder.