View Full Version : Let go of another job


Motherofbees
05-21-16, 11:53 PM
Hi guys! I'm new on here and hitting yet another 'all time low.' I have been let go from a job. It lasted 2 months. I never saw it coming. They just said "it's not working out." So that means I'm not working out to their satisfaction. I look at all the workers there, been there for years, what's so different about me? I very obviously struck people in some inappropriate, offensive ways. And as usual, I don't know what ways. I say things that I literally have no, or vague recollection of. That's scaring me, and that's insane. I've been told I have no filter for years. I'm like, really? U have no idea the things I DON'T say lol! My self esteem and confidence are crushed. 1. What's wrong with me that I can't be better at age 52? 2. Why I can't I just love myself the way I am and ignore people who don't get me? I don't think I'll ever be a long term employee

Socaljaxs
05-22-16, 03:30 AM
Hi guys! I'm new on here and hitting yet another 'all time low.' I have been let go from a job. It lasted 2 months. I never saw it coming. They just said "it's not working out." So that means I'm not working out to their satisfaction. I look at all the workers there, been there for years, what's so different about me? I very obviously struck people in some inappropriate, offensive ways. And as usual, I don't know what ways. I say things that I literally have no, or vague recollection of. That's scaring me, and that's insane. I've been told I have no filter for years. I'm like, really? U have no idea the things I DON'T say lol! My self esteem and confidence are crushed. 1. What's wrong with me that I can't be better at age 52? 2. Why I can't I just love myself the way I am and ignore people who don't get me? I don't think I'll ever be a long term employee

Welcome to ADDF.

Sadly, filters or lack of and long term employment are struggles we deal with.

Curious at the last company did they give you examples of what you did that stuck others' so in such a way? Also, lack of recalling the conversations, is that new or something that you've struggled with for a long time? Is it a complete blank in your head or even a tiny bit of " kinda maybe recall something" with that person or conversation but not exact verbage?

Motherofbees
05-23-16, 01:21 AM
No, I think I've never been able to remember conversations that people have found me offensive in because they were insignificant conversations to me at the time. And no, I want given any info regarding what I did wrong or said inappropriately at past firings. This is so discouraging.

lexaer
07-04-16, 03:29 PM
I think it is important for you to ask them why you were let go.

More of a learning experience and feedback rather than "i dont think this si fair"

It's the same as having an interview and then passin the all the phases except the last and asking for feedback and how you could have improved yourself in the interview.

Twiggy
07-04-16, 07:02 PM
Oh, I've had this happen too.

I was doing as best as I could as 110%, but wasn't good enough...because I didn't learn everything in 5 days.

It was the only job that I felt the bosses were unfair.

Infusion
07-12-16, 10:21 PM
1 week ago, I was let go of my job as well. Here is the real kick in the pants.

I worked at this position for 11 Years.. thats right 11 years. During this time I had 0 disiplanery actions against me, I was top sales rep, I was a company trainer, and was asked to be a supervisor in which I turned it down.
I left to follow the entrpreneurial spirit most people with ADHD have. After 9 years My company failed. mostly because I never kept up on the financial stuff. (Typical trait again)

So i reapplied to the same position I had held for 11 years and they let me go after 4 months for the following reasons.

1. I fold my arms when I talk (although i do this to keep from figiting, it apparently comes across as someone who is arrogant.) lesson learned is, learn "Soft Skills", especially now more than ever as corporations are teaching managers and supervisors these traits and they are largely taken out of context to a person who is not fully trained on what they mean.

2. I am disruptive in meetings, Often I blurt things out that are in my head so that I dont forget to bring them up. Lesson learned is... write your questions down and bring them up outside the meeting directly with your supervisor/Manager.

3. I come across as "arrogant", typically I am able to solve an answer a heck of a lot quicker than most "normal" persons and I find the normality INFERIOR to my abilities. Lesson learned. Shut your mouth. No one likes a "Know-it-all".

4. I critique everything, this is due to the passion to strive to make things PERFECT!. Well lesson learned... Ask yourself this.... Does it function "Good Enough" as it is. then leave it alone.

unfortunately... some of the above teachings I have made above are wasting a brilliant mind. but... this is what society wants. So unfortunately... this is what society gets.

We as persons of ADD have a ferrari engine in our heads. We need to find a road that lets that Ferrari perform. jobs where you are constantly switching tasks, low levels of paperwork, things that allow you to hyperfocus in a good way. (Hyperfocus is a gift that usually comes with ADHD, take advantage of this gift and you will WOW your superiors.)

Attention Deficit Disorder ??? I think we need to call it Ferrari Brain. so that people can better understand our strengths instead of our weeknesses.

Infusion
07-12-16, 10:29 PM
Terminating employment due to a Mental disorder is a discrimination against your human rights. The government regulatory boards should be able to either force an employer to give your job back providing it doesnt force unbearable hardships on the company or, launch a law suit on your behalf.

There is nothing wrong with you due to having ADHD, If better training was available to what society calls "normal. They might be able to take advantage of your gifts instead of focusing on your weeknesses. You are neurologicaly diverse. you are wired different than the majority. its no different than comparing a persons race other than its not visable.

E-Rock
07-15-16, 11:07 PM
Motherofbees-- It sucks being blindsided. I hope you've found your confidence again!

Starting mindfulness meditation had a huge impact on my professional life. It made me aware of how bizarre I could come across in work situations. My inattentiveness would cause me to get anxious which would cause me to spout off some seriously stupid sh*t.



Attention Deficit Disorder ??? I think we need to call it Ferrari Brain. so that people can better understand our strengths instead of our weeknesses.

Ferrari Brain: Sexy, fun, fast and frequently broken down. :p

Radio Hiker
07-19-16, 08:38 PM
1 week ago, I was let go of my job as well. Here is the real kick in the pants.

I worked at this position for 11 Years.. thats right 11 years. During this time I had 0 disiplanery actions against me, I was top sales rep, I was a company trainer, and was asked to be a supervisor in which I turned it down.
I left to follow the entrpreneurial spirit most people with ADHD have. After 9 years My company failed. mostly because I never kept up on the financial stuff. (Typical trait again)

So i reapplied to the same position I had held for 11 years and they let me go after 4 months for the following reasons.

1. I fold my arms when I talk (although i do this to keep from figiting, it apparently comes across as someone who is arrogant.) lesson learned is, learn "Soft Skills", especially now more than ever as corporations are teaching managers and supervisors these traits and they are largely taken out of context to a person who is not fully trained on what they mean.

2. I am disruptive in meetings, Often I blurt things out that are in my head so that I dont forget to bring them up. Lesson learned is... write your questions down and bring them up outside the meeting directly with your supervisor/Manager.

3. I come across as "arrogant", typically I am able to solve an answer a heck of a lot quicker than most "normal" persons and I find the normality INFERIOR to my abilities. Lesson learned. Shut your mouth. No one likes a "Know-it-all".

4. I critique everything, this is due to the passion to strive to make things PERFECT!. Well lesson learned... Ask yourself this.... Does it function "Good Enough" as it is. then leave it alone.

unfortunately... some of the above teachings I have made above are wasting a brilliant mind. but... this is what society wants. So unfortunately... this is what society gets.

We as persons of ADD have a ferrari engine in our heads. We need to find a road that lets that Ferrari perform. jobs where you are constantly switching tasks, low levels of paperwork, things that allow you to hyperfocus in a good way. (Hyperfocus is a gift that usually comes with ADHD, take advantage of this gift and you will WOW your superiors.)

Attention Deficit Disorder ??? I think we need to call it Ferrari Brain. so that people can better understand our strengths instead of our weeknesses.

At different points in my life, I have had your same struggles. Kudos to you for making the effort to try and learn something from your experiences! I have come to similar conclusions as you have.

InvitroCanibal
07-24-16, 05:04 AM
Your title says that you "Let go of the job."

Maybe you made the choice to let go prior to being let go by your employer?

I don't blame you, I just hope that you don't blame yourself. You may need to ask if you self sabotaged or were just unhappy there?

Once you look at the choices you made, then without regret, think about the choices you can make.

Remember that the choices you can make are about defining your needs.

Whatever or whoever defines your needs, or your success for you, is who or what you serve. To define your own needs is to serve yourself and be free. But to define the needs of the job or undertaking is to serve that.

I think we all define our needs differently, there is no shame in that. However, it is odd that our needs take the wayside for Someone elses, or for money, or the expectations of others.


The only thing worth a damn though are your own expectations. Only you can say what your next move is, but if you say it, you will be living life differently, on your own terms.

I'd only encourage you to try.