View Full Version : Your thoughts.....


CanadianDad
06-16-16, 12:11 PM
Brief history: Soon to be 8 yr old son diagnosed with ADHD and LD (executive function) and is also quite anxious in public situations. He's been on Byphentin for just over a year, and it helped with paying attention in school, but he still has quite a bit of anxiety and peer issues, where he just is not interested in talking with his classmates and just plays by himself on breaks.
We talked to his psychologist and tried Vyvanse, but reacted quite badly, going into an almost depression over that, so we did not have him last long on it before going back.
He's now been on Intuniv for about 2 weeks, and we're finding he's really tired most of the day, and extremely lethargic int he evening. Very unlike him, to the point where he seems sad in the evenings and doesn't want to play except on his tablet.
We're meeting with the pediatrician tomorrow, and to be honest don't want to continue with the Intuniv. Any other meds we should talk to her about, or combination of meds. We like his attention with Byphentin, but would just like something that makes him less anxious in public and more willing to talk with peers. (keeping in mind that his mother and I are not the most sociable types so don't want to force him to do stuff we would not do ourselves, especially at his age)

Thanks in advance,

CanadianDad

Caco3girl
06-16-16, 01:31 PM
I have zero experience with medications for that...BUT...my son wasn't very sociable in school. In his mind he might be with these people for the next 12 years and didn't want to embarrass himself. To get him out of his shell I enrolled him in baseball, but please insert any sport there, and once he got confidence on the field and his teammates WANTED to talk to him he really opened up.

May not work for everyone, but it's possible enrolling him in a short term social activity, like one baseball season, might ease some of his discomfort around new people.

CanadianDad
06-16-16, 01:52 PM
I have zero experience with medications for that...BUT...my son wasn't very sociable in school. In his mind he might be with these people for the next 12 years and didn't want to embarrass himself. To get him out of his shell I enrolled him in baseball, but please insert any sport there, and once he got confidence on the field and his teammates WANTED to talk to him he really opened up.

May not work for everyone, but it's possible enrolling him in a short term social activity, like one baseball season, might ease some of his discomfort around new people.

We have tried that, with not much success, but are going to try it again intermittently to see how things change. Again, at his age I could not have cared less either, so do not want to project my idea of what he should be doing when I myself had not interest at his age. I would like him to reach out a little more though.

His teacher says he hardly ever talks to his peers, but does talk to her about things. It could be that it might come in time (he's only in Grade2) and we might just have to be more patient with him. His pediatrician says he might just be shy....... Think we just have to calm down :)

Lunamoth
06-17-16, 06:02 AM
My boy is a similar age to yours, and is also struggling socially at school. He was initially on ritalin but we changed to concerta a few months back and have noticed a positive difference. It reduced his anxiety and helped him cope better with school.

My son has social issues and quite bad OCD that we're trying to help him with at the moment. Although my son keeps to himself during break times at school, he has made it clear to me that he does want friendships.

He's at a pretty big school currently, where the break times are really noisy and chaotic. He has also had some trouble with other boys being unkind, not in a big way but just little things here and there. We've now decided to send him to a small private school in the hopes that a calmer and more structured environment will be more suitable for his temperament.

He just this week started seeing an occupational therapist for sensory processing issues, have you looked into that? It is hard to be relaxed and sociable when your senses are completely overwhelmed, it may be something to consider if you haven't already.

I think I remember you mentioning your son does play therapy? Is he still doing that? Has it helped at all? Sorry if I've remembered incorrectly!

Caco3girl
06-17-16, 08:19 AM
We have tried that, with not much success, but are going to try it again intermittently to see how things change. Again, at his age I could not have cared less either, so do not want to project my idea of what he should be doing when I myself had not interest at his age. I would like him to reach out a little more though.

His teacher says he hardly ever talks to his peers, but does talk to her about things. It could be that it might come in time (he's only in Grade2) and we might just have to be more patient with him. His pediatrician says he might just be shy....... Think we just have to calm down :)

Well some kids aren't sociable but if he likes to talk to adults that is a good sign. My sons baseball team had 3-4 dad coaches, then there were umpires...still at 13 whenever he plays first base or catcher in between innings you can see him chatting up the umpires, it's funny to watch.

I think as a parent all you can hope for is that he has the TOOLS to talk to people, whether they are adults or children. He may not feel he has much common ground with people his own age, some people are just born with old souls. Hopefully things will improve as he gets older.

CanadianDad
06-17-16, 11:45 AM
He may not feel he has much common ground with people his own age, some people are just born with old souls.

I think that may be key. He's interested in what he likes, doesn't fain interest in what others like. That skill he will hopefully learn over time as he gets older like the rest of us do :)

Thanks everyone for the feedback, we'll see what the pediatrician says this afternoon.

sarahsweets
06-22-16, 02:47 AM
Im not familiar with byphentin but have you tried anything else beyond that and vyanse? Vyvanse did the same thing to my daughter as well. I think the fact that it was long acting was what the issue was.

Laserbeak
06-22-16, 04:35 AM
Have you tried Ritalin or Amphetamines? Sometimes, paradoxically, they actually are calming depending on the patient.

CanadianDad
06-23-16, 10:41 AM
Update: Followed up with the Pediatrician and we've moved him to taking the Intuniv in the evening, not the morning. The tiredness/lethargy/seeming sad has all gone away. Plus he's sleeping well now :)

Gonna wait for some feedback from the teacher next week, but it being the end of school soon and they're not really doing much in the way of work, I doubt we'll get much useful information. Looks like we'll have to wait till the fall to find out how it works then (though he always has a hard time settling in at the begining of the school year).

His dosage is only 1mg at the moment, so we'll probably end up having to up that a little, but again, not until the fall. We talked to the Pediatrician about taking him off meds for the summer, and she thought it was a good idea, so that's worked out too :) We only started going to her about 6 weeks ago when our family doctor thought it wise when we started asking about trying other drugs. Seems he doesn't have many ADHD kid patients and thought it wise to send him to a Pedi who has more experience, which she does. We also have a Psychologist we go to sometimes (where he was diagnosed), but that will probably only be yearly unless something goes off-the-rails (fingers crossed it doesn't), but I think for finding the right meds the Pedi will be the way we go.

One thing I was really impressed with is that she said what I've heard on here regularly..... We'll keep trying until we find what works best with him. All kids are different, and it's just a matter of to keep trying......

Anyway, 6 days of school left and we're in the summer..... Start of Grade2 was better than start of Grade1, so we'll keep our fingers crossed for the start of Grade3 in September :) We seem to have been lucky with diagnosing, the school, teachers and now a Pediatrician we like...... Our little guy is happy and smart. What more could we possibly want :)

Thanks for letting me pour my feelings out guys :D

BTW, if anyone is in the GTA area of Toronto with a 5-9 year old they want play dates with a shy quite little 8 year old, send me PM. It would be nice meeting up with parents and not having constant questions asked about why my kid is acting different from the other kids.

CanadianDad

CanadianDad
06-23-16, 10:45 AM
Have you tried Ritalin or Amphetamines? Sometimes, paradoxically, they actually are calming depending on the patient.

Only tried:

Byphentin - Good but some Anxiety
Vyvanse - Put him in a major downer
and
Intuniv - Trying that out now, better with the tiredness now he's taking it in the evening.

Now we have a new Pediatrician we'll be able to, first, keep trying Intuniv in increased dosage starting in September, and then second, try other meds to find what's best if needed.

CanadianDad

CanadianDad
06-23-16, 10:51 AM
Im not familiar with byphentin but have you tried anything else beyond that and vyanse? Vyvanse did the same thing to my daughter as well. I think the fact that it was long acting was what the issue was.

Hopefully my updates will clarify, but I think we're in a much better place now to find what works for him in a timely manner.

We have decided to take the summer off though. We've always found that his Anxiety mainly manifests itself when around many other kids (obviously mostly at school). If we take him to the park, or our local amusement park, he's not really Anxious, just doesn't talk to others. Once he's playing, he's fine and just keeps to himself.

Pediatrician and us think that giving him a break for a couple of months will be fine since it is fairly low stress for him this summer... family visits and time off means he doesn't have to go to day camps at all, though we are going to make a concerted effort to keep him out and playing, at least around other kids, if not with them :)

Should be fun summer off.... I'm taking almost 5 weeks off all told over the two months and have bought the three of us (wife, kid and me) season passes to Canadas Wonderland (like a mini Disneyland). I get the feeling we be at their waterpark at least twice a week :)

CanadianDad

ToneTone
07-03-16, 02:27 PM
That's great news CanadianDad.

My only concern is about not having him on the medication for the summer. A few points. One, you and your spouse and your son need to get really familiar with the effect of the med and how it works and build on that. Sometimes the meds have side effects, and sometimes those side effects go away ... Why not use the summer to get his system used to the med under more relaxed conditions? ...

Also different meds have different effects, and one thing the medication taker/parent needs to know is what the med can do ... vs. what the child will have to do. Some medications motivate me like heck ... others provide better calming ability and long-term thinking. In each case, I have to work to fill in the gap for what the med doesn't do.

Two, ADHD isn't simply a school matter. The condition has devastating effects outside of school. People get in more accidents, suffer more injuries, make more bad and short-sighted decisions, are more prone to addictions, are more impulsive, have trouble following directions, having trouble accessing inner feelings, have trouble listening to others, have trouble. A major part of the effect of the condition is on social life and relationships. Difficulty with focus and planning and remembering has a huge negative effect on relationships. And that negative effect on relationships circles back to interfere with school and job performance.

Why not keep him on the med for the summer and keep working to build up his social skills or focus skills or whatever it is you want him to improve in? Just a thought. ADHD is not just a problem of sitting still in school. It affects all areas of our lives.

Tone

CanadianDad
07-04-16, 02:51 PM
That's great news CanadianDad.

My only concern is about not having him on the medication for the summer. A few points. One, you and your spouse and your son need to get really familiar with the effect of the med and how it works and build on that. Sometimes the meds have side effects, and sometimes those side effects go away ... Why not use the summer to get his system used to the med under more relaxed conditions? ...

Also different meds have different effects, and one thing the medication taker/parent needs to know is what the med can do ... vs. what the child will have to do. Some medications motivate me like heck ... others provide better calming ability and long-term thinking. In each case, I have to work to fill in the gap for what the med doesn't do.

Two, ADHD isn't simply a school matter. The condition has devastating effects outside of school. People get in more accidents, suffer more injuries, make more bad and short-sighted decisions, are more prone to addictions, are more impulsive, have trouble following directions, having trouble accessing inner feelings, have trouble listening to others, have trouble. A major part of the effect of the condition is on social life and relationships. Difficulty with focus and planning and remembering has a huge negative effect on relationships. And that negative effect on relationships circles back to interfere with school and job performance.

Why not keep him on the med for the summer and keep working to build up his social skills or focus skills or whatever it is you want him to improve in? Just a thought. ADHD is not just a problem of sitting still in school. It affects all areas of our lives.

Tone

Sorry, may not have been clear enough in my previous comments :)
We decided to take the summer off under the recommendation of the pediatrician, with the understanding that 2-3 weeks before school starts we'll start him up again to get him back used to it.
We're keeping a close eye on him since this is the first time since he started that he's off meds for more than 2 days. So far, so good, though obviously he's in a good mood since it's the start of summer.
Also, he's heavy on the Innatentive side of the equation, not so much the hyperactive (though he does have regular evening crazies as we call them).

If, however, he starts to seem too out-of-sorts, we'll quickly go back to the pediatrician and get him back on his stuff.

Thanks for the concern and thoughts. It's always good to hear from those who've grown up with ADHD to get a better idea of what he is going through.

[EDIT]

Also, we met with his Grade2 teacher, next years Grade3 teacher and the Vice Principle on his last day of school. Just a quick 30 min session for introductions without our little guy being there. It was all at the VP's request, and boy we could not be happier. New teacher seems nice, and old teacher is going to pass on what she has learned. Hoping that G3 will go even better than G2. I can't imagine what it would be like if we didn't have great support from the school like some seem to have on this board :( We got his report card, and he's a B-C student, but we can't really be upset since we were the same :)