View Full Version : Friend at church ignoring me when I say bye, says hi in rude tone


jashbagash
06-25-16, 12:55 PM
This girl at my church said hi in a snappy rude tone when I said hi to her and then when she was leaving and I said bye she completely ignored me. Why is that? I am so upset I don't know what did to make her not want to even say bye.

Tetrahedra
06-25-16, 03:19 PM
Is she normally rude? If so, then perhaps she's just a rude person. If not, then she might have been having a bad day.

If this girl is normally nice to you and consistently starts acting rude towards you, you can ask her. Just do so in a no-pressure setting where you don't put her on the spot in front of other people.

Laserbeak
06-25-16, 04:45 PM
Why don't you just ignore her?

AddAnxiousMe
06-25-16, 09:41 PM
This girl at my church said hi in a snappy rude tone when I said hi to her and then when she was leaving and I said bye she completely ignored me. Why is that? I am so upset I don't know what did to make her not want to even say bye.

First off, do you have any psychological problems like ADHD, anxiety, depression, OCD, etc. Since this is a place to discuss various psychological/mental problems, I think you need to provide us with more background info about your own struggles that may then shed some light on other things. People with ADD/ADHD (and many other psychiatric disorders) can sometimes unknowingly say offensive things to others. Maybe you said something offensive to her and didn't realize it. It's not really possible for us understand your first post about a girl who is rude to you without any other pertinent information about yourself.

Little Missy
06-25-16, 09:47 PM
First off, do you have any psychological problems like ADHD, anxiety, depression, OCD, etc. Since this is a place to discuss various psychological/mental problems, I think you need to provide us with more background info about your own struggles that may then shed some light on other things. People with ADD/ADHD (and many other psychiatric disorders) can sometimes unknowingly say offensive things to others. Maybe you said something offensive to her and didn't realize it. It's not really possible for us understand your first post about a girl who is rude to you without any other pertinent information about yourself.

I agree and you have changed your name on here now but yet still present nothing but church people problems and Facebook faults. Tell us about yourself.

Unmanagable
06-26-16, 12:02 AM
Here's a link to your previous threads under a different ID....the advice you received then applies now, as well....well wishes to you:

http://www.addforums.com/forums/search.php?searchid=3356730&photoplog_searchinfo=1

TheFitFatty
06-26-16, 02:20 AM
You keep coming on here and talking about the people at this church. I don't understand why you're still going to it, or why you never come back to the same thread to answer the questions that people ask.

Fuzzy12
06-26-16, 06:31 AM
I think you really need to give up on your church friends. They are doing nothing but giving you grief. I can understand that it hurts when you realise that people you care for and consider to be your friends turn out not to be such great friends after all but there's really nothing you can do but let it go.

Fortune
06-26-16, 03:19 PM
Here's a link to your previous threads under a different ID....the advice you received then applies now, as well....well wishes to you:

http://www.addforums.com/forums/search.php?searchid=3356730&photoplog_searchinfo=1

That link leads to no posts or threads. :(

Hiddencreations
06-26-16, 04:59 PM
This girl at my church said hi in a snappy rude tone when I said hi to her and then when she was leaving and I said bye she completely ignored me. Why is that? I am so upset I don't know what did to make her not want to even say bye.

If I could ask something, in a tactful way, HOW are you defining friends? This is me also assuming that the other account is yours, but it sounds like that you are labeling the people at church as friends even though it doesn't appear that you've ever hung out or talked about anything that is not church-related.

A similar anectode is that if I am in college and taking a class. Say I am in a class with 20 other people, so we all share the following things in common:
We have to be in the same location at the same time
We are expected to learn and discuss the same things while in class

None of these things actually makes me friends with anyone in the room, and it may not even make me an acquaintance. We are just breathing the same air and taking in the same information for 90 minutes to 3 hour time period.

----

Not to be harsh, but I don't think these people are your friends and they may have been trying to give you hints for the past month that they were not interested in your friendship. It doesn't mean that there is something wrong with you, it just means to each his own. Personally, I don't make friends with every person whose schedule happens to temporarily sync with mine. She may be getting rude and snappy because you are not getting the hint, so repeated attempts to socialize (even a small hello) may be an annoyance to that person.

I would say take a step back. Don't read into her behavior and don't try to find a justification for why she couldn't say hi or bye. Take it as a teaching moment--now you know that (for now) she doesn't want your greetings or salutations. Don't engage and don't expect engagement in conversation. Let them come to you on their own time.

Lunacie
06-26-16, 05:07 PM
That link leads to no posts or threads. :(

Here is one of them: http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=177410

Here's another one: http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=177730

And one more: http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=177916

Certainly seems like the same poster, same kind of complaint.

AddAnxiousMe
06-26-16, 07:39 PM
I have read her other threads and she does not reveal any personal/physical/ psychological problems that she may have and that would be helpful for all here to know in order to better advise her. Otherwise it just sounds like a Dear Abby question!

Unmanagable
06-26-16, 10:31 PM
My bad, Fortune, and thanks, Lunacie. Not sure why it didn't work. It was the link to their other profile page under the "All threads started...." option. Damn modern technology. lol

Lloyd_
07-28-16, 12:31 AM
This girl at my church said hi in a snappy rude tone when I said hi to her and then when she was leaving and I said bye she completely ignored me. Why is that? I am so upset I don't know what did to make her not want to even say bye.

Maybe it's time to start attending a different church? With 'friends' like those, who needs enemies?