View Full Version : How do you deal with your ADD


LethalFocus
06-28-16, 07:26 AM
I now take ritalin it helps me with my memory.
I watched all the resources Dr.Russell Barkely put on youtube and I pretty much have also this time blindness, know what I have to do but can't do it, some sense of inner drive is not there but it should be,..
The worst part is to see your colleagues to do so much in a day and you just can't get even started..
I read the addmagazine and all the organization advice but I never apply most of it, I just can't it's weird.

tomasl
06-28-16, 09:36 AM
My method of dealing with ADD:

I try to :

-Accept my ADD, accept I will never have normal job , never have good finances, and never have a life like most others do, and NOT feel guilty about it. While it may not cure ADD, it is effective for dealing with the occasional depressive feelings.

-Try to create a life that doesn't force me to deal with ADD. Make radical changes in my life, just to keep it interesting, and move fast from one interesting thing to another. It's just my nature to behave like that, so why not embrace it?

I've tried everything else, including medications and everything alternative. Nothing really helps for ADD, but having a healthy lifestyle doesn't hurt you either.

I can't say 'fighting' ADD got me anywhere. It's like fighting a war against 'terror' or drugs. You can't win it. Just make peace with it, and accept the way you are.

Chicky75
06-28-16, 09:53 AM
I've found that breaking tasks down to almost absurdly small chunks really helps me. One little thing that will only take five minutes doesn't seem as overwhelming as a whole project. And I've realized that I really need to use something like the Pomodoro technique at work to really be productive (if you search for Pomodoro, you'll find a lot of info on it in this forum). I have an app on my phone called Focus Watch, which I can set for different time intervals. Right now 25 minutes of working time with 10 minutes off after has been working great for me.

But that said, everyone has different coping techniques. I think it's just a matter of trying them to see what works best for you.

I know that sense of lack of inner drive - I've definitely been there. And I think, for me at least, part of it was just being on the verge of giving up. I had struggled with ADD all my life, but wasn't diagnosed until I was almost 30 and didn't actually get really useful help (including medication) for it until my late 30's. The lack of inner drive just seemed to grow bigger and bigger, but when I finally had an appointment with a clinical psychologist who suggested some coping techniques and started seeing a good therapist, I started to be able to push past the lack of drive.

I think what I'm trying to say is that medication is good and necessary for a lot of us, but I think figuring out what habits and attitudes we've developed because of dealing with ADHD, especially if it wasn't diagnosed until later in life, is also necessary. I think a lot of us probably have a lot of unconscious reactions to things that might have been useful in the past as a way to protect ourselves or get by, but that aren't really useful as we get older. I hope that makes sense.

Pilgrim
07-27-16, 10:37 PM
You have to work with your environment. This is probably the key, fixing things up around you that help you thrive; job, relationships, home, lifestyle.

Medication is still a big part of my routine, if not that coffee. Plus good diet. Water and multivitamin.
Keep a good attitude, if situations become toxic, get outa there. Positive mental attitude.

Accept that I'm gunna have bad days. And belief in a higher power, if possible.

gen_car
07-29-16, 08:16 PM
I'm not sure I'd trade it in or change anything if I could. ADD has given me the ability to be highly creative, and now with meds I can focus well, which is great since I'm a writer. I went back to school and was very successful.

Yeah, they're drawbacks, but I believe most are what other people put on us. We can do and be anything we want. However, when family and friends find out, they seem to be the ones to hold me back.

I never use my ADD as an excuse for screwing up, but I'm constantly reminded every time I do. It would be much easier if I just said, "Oh, well, can't help it, I have ADD!"

It's hard when family members are constantly on my ***, about everything. I think my ADD is their excuse for blaming me and making me responsible for everything bad that happens. I should only be so powerful!

I've learned to ignore a lot of it, because after going back to school at the age of 50, graduating, when I never finished anything I started before this, and had a 3.7 GPA to boot!! This is when I realized all along everyone else was dragging me down, and had an excuse to point fingers. Now I just say "F" them, I know my worth, and try being around positive people and doing positive things. You've come here, which is great. Today is my first day, but I'm sure this is a very supportive place. People here understand, so as they say, "keep coming back," and don't buy into the BS. You are a good person, and surely have many fine qualities. I don't know you, but would be happy to talk with you anytime!!

sarahsweets
07-30-16, 08:07 AM
I'm not sure I'd trade it in or change anything if I could. ADD has given me the ability to be highly creative, and now with meds I can focus well, which is great since I'm a writer. I went back to school and was very successful.

Meds are a life saver for some of us. Too bad there is such a stigma.



I hope your not saying that someone who admits their adhd caused an negative outcome would be using it as an excuse. Adhd causes impairments.

[quote]It's hard when family members are constantly on my ***, about everything. I think my ADD is their excuse for blaming me and making me responsible for everything bad that happens. I should only be so powerful!

People, especially family who dont get it always heap on the blame.
They dont understand it, so they blame us. And, when you offer to have them read some real info about it, they cant be bothered. They would rather live with their own ignorance.

Pincheyloveclaw
08-03-16, 07:39 AM
This is a good question. I too was diagnosed later in life, and I will admit to some bad habits that don't serve me so well any more. One of those is to never admit fault if you don't remember doing something wrong, and finding a way to incorporate blame on others when you do. This works well when you have a high turnover of jobs and friends anyway, but when I settled down, it caused a lot of problems.
Medication helps me with boredom, when I get bored I can literally fall asleep at work-related or while driving. I used to beat myself up about that pretty bad,I even had myself tested for narcolepsy and seizure disorders, it also led to me taking so much caffeine that I developed twitching in my eyelids (talk about distraction). Did you know you can get caffeine gum? Works great when you work in areas that don't allow food our drink.

It took therapy for me to see myself as someone with very unique and desirable skills-just that those skills come with some life accommodations that seem pretty weird to most folks.
My ADD dose define me, but not as someone with a disease or disorder, but as a person with creative and intuitive skills that most people can't understand. That means I don't think like other people- and they don't understand the negative side of that either. If the world was designed to accommodate ADD then it would be NT that is considered a genius or a savant when it came to things like driving, remembering many unrelated things, cleanliness, remembering names, showing up on time, etc. But when these folks are found to be deficient in creativity, novelty, seeing a subject largely and/or in minute detail, or even failing to develop a passionate interest about anything, or being content to follow the same interest for their entire life (how boring is that!). Then we would see fit to slap a label on them- may I suggest- Creative Deficiency Disorder. This is the mindset that I now have. If I think of myself as deficient then I am hopeless; if I think of myself as living in a poorly designed society, it becomes a challenge to be solved creativly. And that my friends is where we shine (though it would help to have some NT's to carry out those genious plans, so we can move on to something more interesting).

sarahsweets
08-03-16, 08:39 AM
This is a good question. I too was diagnosed later in life, and I will admit to some bad habits that don't serve me so well any more. One of those is to never admit fault if you don't remember doing something wrong, and finding a way to incorporate blame on others when you do. This works well when you have a high turnover of jobs and friends anyway, but when I settled down, it caused a lot of problems.
Medication helps me with boredom, when I get bored I can literally fall asleep at work-related or while driving. I used to beat myself up about that pretty bad,I even had myself tested for narcolepsy and seizure disorders, it also led to me taking so much caffeine that I developed twitching in my eyelids (talk about distraction). Did you know you can get caffeine gum? Works great when you work in areas that don't allow food our drink.

It took therapy for me to see myself as someone with very unique and desirable skills-just that those skills come with some life accommodations that seem pretty weird to most folks.
My ADD dose define me, but not as someone with a disease or disorder, but as a person with creative and intuitive skills that most people can't understand. That means I don't think like other people- and they don't understand the negative side of that either. If the world was designed to accommodate ADD then it would be NT that is considered a genius or a savant when it came to things like driving, remembering many unrelated things, cleanliness, remembering names, showing up on time, etc. But when these folks are found to be deficient in creativity, novelty, seeing a subject largely and/or in minute detail, or even failing to develop a passionate interest about anything, or being content to follow the same interest for their entire life (how boring is that!). Then we would see fit to slap a label on them- may I suggest- Creative Deficiency Disorder. This is the mindset that I now have. If I think of myself as deficient then I am hopeless; if I think of myself as living in a poorly designed society, it becomes a challenge to be solved creativly. And that my friends is where we shine (though it would help to have some NT's to carry out those genious plans, so we can move on to something more interesting).

Im glad that sort of attitude works for you. For me, acknowledging that adhd is a disorder, treating it, and accepting it isnt a negative. Knowing that I have something that is so impairing means that I will do my best to treat it and learn some work-arounds to live in this cookie cutter world. I dont think I am any more creative because of adhd because I believe I would have been creative even if I didnt have the disorder. I think its important to validate the struggles that accompany adhd lest people who are not as happy now feel like there is something wrong with them for feeling that way.

Bluechoo
08-03-16, 01:07 PM
I try to give my ADHD the respect and attention it deserves, and then move on to my other priorities in life. ADHD is a debilitating disorder for many. It may be debilitating for me, but in my mind I try to play it down just a tad, while playing my strengths up. I do much better when I am not focusing on how bad my focus is due to adhd (I'm not sure if that makes sense, but perhaps it will to the adhd mind).

That said, there are good days and bad days. And sometimes I just have to say "I've done my best for today," and let things be. I just try not to fall to deeply into a "broken-brain" depression, because I've been there before and it leads nowhere good. We live in a synthetic society, with dynamics changing rapidly every day; there's no reason to think that a brain that took hundreds of millions of years to evolve will suddenly be able to change at culture's whim. The meds are there to help people like us avoid falling through the cracks.

KarmanMonkey
08-05-16, 11:48 AM
The days I manage to scrape some time together at the beginning and actually plan what I'm going to do tend to become the best days.

Largely though, I don't try to overcome my ADD so much as I do what I can to work around the problems.

Like some of these other folks, a big part is accepting that my life is a work in progress, and not every day is going to be awesome. Yesterday sucked. Today is better. If I beat myself up over yesterday, or still dwell on what I didn't do yesterday, then I'm quickly going to turn today into a lousy day too.

It's okay to look at something that went wrong if it's from the perspective of looking for solutions (either to fix what happened or prevent it from happening again); it's far less helpful to just wallow in what happened and the consequences of that action (or inaction)