View Full Version : Girlfriend with ADD ignoring me


SuperMario10
07-31-16, 10:42 AM
Hello everyone,

(Excuse my bad grammer)

I dont know much about ADD but I know my girlfriend has it. I've been in a long distance relationship with her for almost a year. Im very happy with her, and I know shes with me too.

My girlfriend started acting weird for the first time about 4/5 months ago. She was mad at me for a couple of days without any reason. She acted very weird and was ignoring me, negative about me and our relationship etc. I was very devistated atthat point because im a sensetive man. I know it was also because of her busy life at school. After 3/4 days she was back to her normal state and apologied. We didnt talked about it later.

Aftee 2 months almost the same thing happened to her. It was worse this time and after 4/5 days i contacted her best friend. She forced her to talk to me and it was good again..

After this I planned to talk with her face to face about these 2 situations about what was going on with her mind. But we've just seen eachother once since these last 2 months. And now its occured for the 3rd time...

It has been 4 days now and she didnt say one word/textmessage for almost 3 days, and didnt even read my messages.. the ignoring part has never been worse like this. Normally she would talk with me eventhough she was mad. But now imfeeling hopeless and i dont know what to do..

I tried talking with her, ignoring her, but nothings helps. I cant force her to talk because she lives 3 hours away from me. And i cant go to her because of private problems. I want to wait 1/2 days more to contact her best friend again.. even though shes on her holidays. I dont think my girlfriend is busy anyway right now.. she justs works but that cant be a reason to ignore me.

I hope you guys can help me what to do.. right now im not talking to her too.. its hard for me but maybe she realizes that i have my feelings too..

Pilgrim
07-31-16, 10:58 AM
Sometimes ADD really puts you in your own little world, stress is a major pain for me also.

SuperMario10
07-31-16, 11:54 AM
Should I try communicating with her? So sending her (nice, sweet) textmessages? Or should I just not say any word? I dont know what to do..

SuperMario10
07-31-16, 05:42 PM
Now she texted me after 3 days saying its better for her to stay alone etc. Same negativiry she did 2 months ago.. its so hard for me to take it.

sarahsweets
08-01-16, 04:05 AM
Super mario:
It may be a sign that its time to move on. No matter if its just her or her adhd, she is sending you the message that she just doesnt have it in her for a relationship right now. You do not deserve to be in this kind of pain anymore.

SuperMario10
08-01-16, 04:23 AM
She said exactly the some words 2 months ago. I know she doesnt mean it she is just in her depression i think. I cant and will not let her go, i love her to the death and will do anything for her. Ill just wait a few more days hoping for her to calm down

Hermus
08-01-16, 06:22 AM
She said exactly the some words 2 months ago. I know she doesnt mean it she is just in her depression i think. I cant and will not let her go, i love her to the death and will do anything for her. Ill just wait a few more days hoping for her to calm down

Maybe she did mean it. Sometimes people who are depressed need time on their own.

You've only been in a relationship with her for a year. If she is already acting this way now, it's not going to be better. Even if her ADD is a problem you should't have to put up with being ignored for days on end. I agree with sarahsweets that it's time to move on. It doesn't really sound to me like you are getting anything out of this relationship.

sarahsweets
08-01-16, 09:55 AM
My girlfriend started acting weird for the first time about 4/5 months ago. She was mad at me for a couple of days without any reason. She acted very weird and was ignoring me, negative about me and our relationship etc. I was very devistated atthat point because im a sensetive man. I know it was also because of her busy life at school. After 3/4 days she was back to her normal state and apologied. We didnt talked about it later.
How does a busy life translate to ignoring you and being negative about the relationship?

Aftee 2 months almost the same thing happened to her. It was worse this time and after 4/5 days i contacted her best friend. She forced her to talk to me and it was good again..

Not to sound harsh but you should have left the best friend out of it. Its not her job to get involved with your relationship and she shoudnt have been asked. As much as you love your girlfriend, its still inconsiderate of her to just go silent. It almost seems like she is trying to send you a message... And you say her friend forced her to talk to you...how is that supposed to make you feel?


After this I planned to talk with her face to face about these 2 situations about what was going on with her mind. But we've just seen eachother once since these last 2 months. And now its occured for the 3rd time...
Do not put this off, if you cant see her face to face soon then do it over the phone. You need to get this out in the open.

It has been 4 days now and she didnt say one word/textmessage for almost 3 days, and didnt even read my messages.. the ignoring part has never been worse like this. Normally she would talk with me eventhough she was mad. But now imfeeling hopeless and i dont know what to do..

Do you see how wrong and unfair this is? Who does that to someone they supposedly love?

I tried talking with her, ignoring her, but nothings helps. I cant force her to talk because she lives 3 hours away from me. And i cant go to her because of private problems.
You are making all the effort and she is making none. This isnt a healthy relationship. And what do you mean by 'private problems'?

I want to wait 1/2 days more to contact her best friend again.. even though shes on her holidays. I dont think my girlfriend is busy anyway right now.. she justs works but that cant be a reason to ignore me.

Do not contact her best friend. Its not fair, not her job and its not going to make your girlfriend want to talk to you because SHES ready, it will be because you asked her friend to get involved.

I hope you guys can help me what to do.. right now im not talking to her too.. its hard for me but maybe she realizes that i have my feelings too..
I am not trying to be harsh, just honest and my opinions.
I would never involve a romantic partner's best friend. Its just not right or fair.
She is sending you a message but you arent getting it.
You cant change or control her moods and behavior. You can only change your own reactions, behavior and actions.
You asked for opinions so I am just being honest.
You will continue to be hurt if you keep at it like this.