I'm 51 and standing at the door of 52, My son's are now 22, 29 and 13. For many years I did my thing and missed some of what is importiant to holding a family together, You know the word "selflessness" putting away what you want for the better of the whole. This case family, I am not sure how we did it excepth through our faith background. A few good friends from the past who I would meet up with that I have not seen in a long while are amaized that I am still married to my wife. SHe is one great lady ! This thinking came about because of this weekend. It's the last weekend to hunt till Deer season starts up in Sept. and I will be jonesing but my youngest has a soccer game Sat. and so my on the whem to take a few days to go hunt in NY is out. He's very happy that we are going to do a weekend together and I think the wife is also. I just got done with her planning all the activities and their is a full schedual.
. Now do I regret the decision to not hunt ? maybe a little for it's my nature to hunt and a love just to get out in the woods. But it's also my responabilty to family. For many years my ADHD was so bad I couldn't reason this at all. I would be out the door and hunting and sometime in the hunt I would get a sinking feeling in my gut that would tell me I screwed up. I would get home and appoligize and all would be fine but I'm thankfull for the med's I am on. Life changed the day I stated taking them. 5 years ago.

that bit of wisdom hit me just when i was ready to hear it, thank you ,DaveHawk

Excellent story and advice...
This is a perfect example of why society needs to respect and listen to its elders (not that you're that old!;) )
I am 37, have a 10 year old daughter, was diagnosed a yar ago and am slowly working thorugh the guilt of being Mr Impulsive for her first 9 years. It is a lot of learnt behaviour for me, the meds just provide the clarity of vision to make the changes. I still need to want to change.
You're to be congratulated for seeing the blessings that family can give.


As I read on a bumper sticker: "Look after your kids, they are the ones to choose your nursing home later!"

I was at an information meeting on Tuesday night about dealing with ODD kids. One of the things that was mentioned was that fathers on average spend one minute per day with a child of theirs where it's not talking about the business of the day. Mum's apparently did a little better at ten minutes per day.

One of the trials the speaker talked about was to have teachers spend 90 seconds per day in contact with the difficult kid talking about something other than school. The results were amazing apparently.

Kids crave our attention and somehow we've escaped as fathers without mentors to set the example. I don't have boys but my girls have had a piece of me and I'm grateful for their teachings.
Good on you Dave.
Respectfully. Ian.

Ian, I know alot of guys who have coached a sport for their son or daughter and their are the hunters who spend time with their kids teaching them. None of these dad's I know have kids who are troubled. Amazing to me a father who neglects his kids.