View Full Version : Hyper-Motivated friend gets me down.


FogNoggin
11-04-16, 05:21 PM
My friend introduced me to used washer, dryer repair and sales.
Was doing OK for awhile but with colder weather and Christmas approaching, nothing is selling, luckily I have just got my (much belated Unemployment insurance)

He always calls me, he is working on machines, it's ALL he thinks about and talks about, he makes sales trips out of province.

Me, I have to force myself to pick up my tools and get started and stay focused, a lot of the times I struggle to get out of the house, peel myself offa YouTube, let alone go out of Province.

I find myself rating myself according to his motivational prowess, comparatively, I am a stick in the mud with concrete in the mix.

I do get motivated (on ADD schedule) and especially when I take my 'grey market RC stims' but my ADD also determines just how well the stims will work.

He called today, but I did not get back to him because I told him a couple days ago I would help him fix and move some machines, and here I am trying to take a break on stims and I am on the couch trying to keep my eyelids from succumbing to gravity.
(made some coffee...brb)
OK, yum..coffee!

I did not call back because I am tired of telling him I am not up to it, AGAIN!
(He is on celexa btw, for debilitating anxiety and depression, and I insist it gives him a lot of his energy, which he denies)

He is a great guy and friend, but I come short all too often by comparison.

Otherwise my self esteem is OK, but subconsciously it beats me up and reminds me of my limitations that I struggle to overcome and how the hell do I keep my head above water for the rest of my life?

Oh, and it's been awhile, I just need to talk to those who can understand my struggle.

Fuzzy12
11-04-16, 08:35 PM
I think I know how that feels.:grouphug:

FogNoggin
11-04-16, 09:01 PM
It took Fuzzy12 to make that 'clear'.
;)

Fuzzy12
11-05-16, 12:42 AM
It took Fuzzy12 to make that 'clear'.
;)

Huh?? Now this is not clear to.me at all..:scratch:

FogNoggin
11-05-16, 12:47 AM
Fuzzy - clear
left - right
Dirty - clean
white - black
opaque - translucent

Fuzzy12
11-05-16, 12:50 AM
Ah. .ok..

FogNoggin
11-05-16, 02:18 AM
Just a play on words, one of my greatest talents, which is why today I am a billionaire.
;)
What's a billion in Zimbabwe dollars?

Anyway, my friend called from on his way from another province.
I told him about this post, how I feel, the works, and how I can't control completely how I feel in a given day, two days from now, and why I didn't call him back.

He was completely cool and understanding about it, he is willing to accommodate my shortcomings, Like he didn't already know.

Fuzzy12
11-05-16, 02:47 AM
Just a play on words, one of my greatest talents, which is why today I am a billionaire.
;)
What's a billion in Zimbabwe dollars?

Anyway, my friend called from on his way from another province.
I told him about this post, how I feel, the works, and how I can't control completely how I feel in a given day, two days from now, and why I didn't call him back.

He was completely cool and understanding about it, he is willing to accommodate my shortcomings, Like he didn't already know.

Fully motivated to understand you better from now on..??? ;)

FogNoggin
11-05-16, 02:57 AM
Seems a lot of what I say and write has a double or hidden meaning, I am somewhat hypercryptical to those who don't understand right off.

Fuzzy12
11-05-16, 03:04 AM
Well, I don't like being hyper criticised so I'm going to shut up now. :)

stef
11-05-16, 03:23 AM
He was completely cool and understanding about it, he is willing to accommodate my shortcomings, Like he didn't already know.

Hey that's awesome!
And you can just let the friend be their energetic, driven selves and accept this, and in turn be the friend that they appreciate.

it ended up coincidentally, that my best friend here and i work in the same branch. except on a resumé, I am techically qualified to be her assistant or at best a very junior member of her staff. This ate away at me for years, not in a nasty jealous way but i was ashamed and at times resentful but then she is an absolutely beautiful person and a true friend. so i also felt guilty :doh:.

She simply has a level of energy that i don't, and will never , possess. and they almost came over last weekend ( her and BF unexpectedly on outing near my apt. ) but we decided to meet up'in town and it'almost killed me just to go out, and she said'even before i said anything, that she hoped'i was ok with this and knew how much i needed my sunday. because she is a good, thoughtful,friend

FogNoggin
11-05-16, 03:55 AM
However, his energy allows him to help me out, And me him, I earn machines when I help him remove broken machines, we exchange parts, we order stuff from ebay/amazon.
He taught me how to fix them, I got him learning refrigerators and I showed him a few things to, because I have always had a knack for understanding how things work.
He even gives me pointers on my ads. He makes appliance photography into appliance pornography. (I joke about that about his Kijiji photo skilz.)

Although I do hit the skids sometimes, it's a learning experience, still learning and retrofitting my home, and a fence to hide my 'scrapyard' from neighbors leering eyes and itchy phone fingers to city hall.

If I fail at this, I'll need to get a real job, and that scares me into motivation.

FogNoggin
11-05-16, 03:56 AM
For the first time ever, I used my talents to earn money.

ADDon1
11-13-16, 01:36 PM
For the first time ever, I used my talents to earn money.

How did that feel like? Can't say I can relate on that one :eyebrow: