View Full Version : No Motivation? No goal?


Melodrama
12-09-16, 12:42 AM
Alright so I've talked about my depression on this site before, I'm calmer now but there is one problem: I have no reason to go to school.

For the past two years I have made straight A's and a few B's. This was powered by my ego and arrogance. I said, yes. I will become a great film maker/photographer one day, so I may as well work hard.

Now I am realizing I don't like film/photography. I don't know why I wanted to an artist in the first place. I do not want to work or in bussiness either.

I do not see myself in 10 years. I don't know who I am. I don't know who I will become. I don't enjoy anything in particular. I don't like art or drawing or film or paint or clarinet or piano or sculpting or cooking. Time and time and time again I fail to find what I like, and what I enjoy. I want to know what it is I love, so that I can be consumed by that love, much like a painter does or a writer.

A painter doesnt paint every day to become famous or to be better than someone else. That could be a GOAL, but they paint because they love it! They loving painting so they do it whenever they get the time.

Sometimes in my past I have tried to force myself to be consumed by something like programming becausey my friends were doing it, and it turned out I hated it.

I don't enjoy anything. I am so lost in a world where everyone else seems to know what they like. I don't like anything, and I never have. My life is pointless, and I dont see myself going to college and recieving a degree. I dont know what the point in life is. I am failing all of my classes now. I have missed two weeks of school. I have no motivation because i dont know what i want to do.

I am frantically trying to find what it is I want to do because i dont want to end up dropping out of high school and killing myself. I am so lost. I don't enjoy anything. The only fulfillment I get in life is when my Ego is validated.

FogNoggin
12-09-16, 12:24 PM
I like D & A.

Why do I have to be on something to enjoy playing my guitar?

I used to look at my Late Grandfather and think, "He has no interests other than drinking".

I could be a great guitarist if I felt like playing it more often.
I play mediocre melodies.

Seriously, I can pump out some great riffs, I have talent, but I don't play it enough.


But, if you must, get an electric guitar or something, playing a musical instrument is the best medicine for focus training, sometimes something happens, you start belting out amazing stuff, it's then you realise you have achieved focus!


Other than that, I have lots of stuff I ordered from ebay for my 'hobby of the week', by the time I get the supplies, I am not into that hobby anymore.


I completely understand your predicament.

ginniebean
12-09-16, 03:53 PM
Don't mistake liking your job for deep passionate like for a job. The perfect job is generallt a unicorn. Few people passionately love their job. Most people passionately love the stability of knowing their bills will be paid, they have enough to eat and take care of themselves, and they keep a roof over their heads.

For those without these things their quality of life goes in the crapper. People want this above esoteric emotional goals of fulfillment and tend to seek that outside of their job.

Don't set yourself up with pie in the sky ideals. Work is generally a one foot in front of the other grind.

Melodrama
12-09-16, 08:29 PM
Don't mistake liking your job for deep passionate like for a job. The perfect job is generallt a unicorn. Few people passionately love their job. Most people passionately love the stability of knowing their bills will be paid, they have enough to eat and take care of themselves, and they keep a roof over their heads.

For those without these things their quality of life goes in the crapper. People want this above esoteric emotional goals of fulfillment and tend to seek that outside of their job.

Don't set yourself up with pie in the sky ideals. Work is generally a one foot in front of the other grind.

You did not answer my question. You think I don't know what hard work is? You think I havn't had jobs I didn't like?

I don't have motivation because I don't have a goal, not because I'm lazy or that I don't want to put in the work like you are making me out to be.

I do not see meaning in life, I am never happy and never have been. There is no point in me working because I have no goal.

I hate myself constantly and have no self confidence. I do not like how my brain works, no one would. I loose friends easily. No one likes me. I don't enjoy anything. I am terrible.

Let's rephrase my question: Help me find meaning in life before I kill myself or start doing drugs like all the other kids of my generation.

Little Missy
12-09-16, 10:24 PM
You did not answer my question. You think I don't know what hard work is? You think I havn't had jobs I didn't like?

I don't have motivation because I don't have a goal, not because I'm lazy or that I don't want to put in the work like you are making me out to be.

I do not see meaning in life, I am never happy and never have been. There is no point in me working because I have no goal.

I hate myself constantly and have no self confidence. I do not like how my brain works, no one would. I loose friends easily. No one likes me. I don't enjoy anything. I am terrible.

Let's rephrase my question: Help me find meaning in life before I kill myself or start doing drugs like all the other kids of my generation.

I believe you need to have your parents find a good psychiatrist for you. And I really hope that you are no longer abusing your dog.

Melodrama
12-09-16, 10:47 PM
I believe you need to have your parents find a good psychiatrist for you. And I really hope that you are no longer abusing your dog.

I'm going on my third day of Prozac. We tried Evekeo, a Stimulant similar to adderal, for a week, but that only made me more anxious.

There is little hope for me. I am unchangable and nothing anyone says gets through to me. I argue with my therapist, I argue with my friends, I loose friends, I loose hope.

I hate my ego, I hate my insecurities, I hate my hair, I hate my body, I hate my nose and face and voice. I hate my feelings and emotions, my personality, I hate my art, I hate the way I think. The harder I try to change any of these the worse it gets, and that is why I hate my brain.

Jeftheginger
12-10-16, 02:13 AM
Well so, my hobby and what I enjoy is philosophy and the art of finding truth, and self truth. For me this is enjoyment, however this is the tool that can help you find yourself. So I suggest you read Discourse on Method and The Meditations, by Rene Descartes. Have fun.

cobain67
12-10-16, 01:21 PM
I relate in that I have no goals, dreams, purpose, etc. The thing that helps in the moment is being mindful and in the moment, not in tomorrow, yesterday, judgement of self or anything other than this exact moment. In the moment nothing is wrong, I am me, you are you.. The wrong is where our focus goes. I don't know what to say about goals or ambition as I have zero other than because I must do x,y,z I somehow do. Check this link out:

"Minimize Anxiety & Depression by Living in the Now" (http://www.printfriendly.com/print?source=homepage&url_s=uGGCF%25dN%25cS%25cSwHFGzvAqmBEt%25cSzvAvzvM r-nAKvrGL-qrCErFFvBA-oL-yvIvAt-vA-Gur-ABJ%25cS) by Owen O'Brien

Jeftheginger
12-13-16, 12:37 AM
I relate in that I have no goals, dreams, purpose, etc. The thing that helps in the moment is being mindful and in the moment, not in tomorrow, yesterday, judgement of self or anything other than this exact moment. In the moment nothing is wrong, I am me, you are you.. The wrong is where our focus goes. I don't know what to say about goals or ambition as I have zero other than because I must do x,y,z I somehow do. Check this link out:

"Minimize Anxiety & Depression by Living in the Now" (http://www.printfriendly.com/print?source=homepage&url_s=uGGCF%25dN%25cS%25cSwHFGzvAqmBEt%25cSzvAvzvM r-nAKvrGL-qrCErFFvBA-oL-yvIvAt-vA-Gur-ABJ%25cS) by Owen O'Brien

Good article. Cheesy but good
Very cheesy.

cobain67
12-13-16, 03:36 AM
Good article. Cheesy but good
Very cheesy.

The examples used are not great, but the message delivered is valuable, at least for starters IMO. :)